(no subject)
WOW, it's been almost a full year since I've written in LJ. The only reason I even thought about it is bc I started a blog on my myspace page. Yes I have a myspace page it's myspace/princessbabyjayj for those of you who would like to see it. LOL I like to think people actually read this page. It's easier to write when you think you have an audience. But anyway, I'm fine now. I did move to Texas finally, I'm a Texan now. At first I was sad about leaving Louisiana and my friends and stuff but since I've been here I haven't received a single call from anyone so. Sometimes I feel so alone in the world. Right now I'm really upset, I'm so behind on ALL my bills and I'm barely getting paid enough to cover a 1/3 of them. I made a Vet. appt for Daisy bc I think she's pregnant and I wanted to get her checked on but now I don't think I can take her. But I think I will, it's like having a child and I know if anything was wrong with my children I'd forget about everything else and take care of them. Did I tell you guys I hae 4 dogs now. Yep, I have 2 Jack Russells and 2 Rat Terriers. You can check myspace for pics, but they're cute. All named after disney characters Dori, Dash, Daisy and Dodger. But anyway, I'm stressed about that. But I know everything will work out. I took some time and read over a few of my past entries, man so many memories. It's funny bc when I started I was so in love with Arkeen, now I'm so focused on trying to forget him. I have a new boyfriend now, I would tell you his full name but I know he wouldn't like that so it's just Jamal. He's a really nice guy, different in so many ways, but sometimes he reminds me of Arkeen. Last night we were out and everything was fine, we were watching a movie and I decided to let him lay on me, as he was laying there I just started thinking about Arkeen for some reason. My whole mood changed I really just wanted to go home and cry the rest of the night, but instead Jamal and I went out for ice cream and watched these kids act a fool; the night got better. I'm trying really hard not to mess things up with him. Back in BR after Arkeen and I broke up, a few guys wanted to date me. Of course it was way too soon then, but it's been well over a year now. I think the reason is that Jamal is really the first guy since Arkeen that I'm actually allowing a chance to get the my heart. I want things to work out. He's an interesting guy, has a very diversed family. He speaks spanish, some. Oh and he just had a baby Jamaree. I hadn't seen the baby up close yet but I've seen pictures, he's really cute. I know, I know, a man with a baby. It's actaully not a turn off for me, I'm actually jealous. I want that some bad and it feels like everyone around me is getting just what I want. Well anyway, I plan to make LJ a daily thing now, so I'm babble more tomorrow or later today or whatever. Thanks for listening.