(no subject)
We have had my aunt staying with us since Thursday. I love all my aunts dearly (well, except Auntie K, who is narrow minded and intolerant and Auntie E who doesn't consider us good enough for her family get togethers) but I am so glad she has gone home! She is my mum's eldest surviving sister. That sounds terrible, but my mum and her siblings are spread over 20 years, Mum being the youngest and Auntie R now being the eldest - with 15 years between the two. It is the first time Auntie R has been away from home since Uncle K died about 18 months ago and it was initially awful to have her arrive without him. Uncle K and I always got on famously (he is the uncle who left me his Violet Needham books in his will).
Poor old auntie has had a terrible time and I did feel bad when I had less than good niece thoughts over the four days she was with us. Not only has she lost her husband, she has also lost a cherished daughter in law very suddenly from a galloping tumour (six weeks from diagnosis to the end) and her own health has been bad too. She has 40% of her heart function remaining for no known reason. The missing 60% is dead, no bringing it back with a bypass (if she'd survive the surgery, which I doubt) and you can tell. She's always been healthy but you could really tell the difference. You could also tell that she is lonely. She has her son and grandchildren nearby but of course they have their own lives, however much time they spend with her. She goes out to play bridge two or three times a week and I think that's the only kind of socialising she does regularly. She talked non-stop, almost! And during a conversation if she wants to say something instead of waiting her turn she just turns her volume up to get her point across. My dad doesn't need any encouragement in that line so mum and I didn't get much chance to speak! And she never shut up! Even during programmes on the TV she chit chatted all the time, which was a bit irritating. We didn't really watch TV but there was a Miss Marple on that we entertained her with and a documentary about Elizabeth I and we didn't get to hear much of either. Mum is a little concerned that Auntie R's mind is going as she doesn't always get her facts right. I don't know about that as this was mainly on the Sunday when we had gone to my uncle W's and they were all reminiscing about the past.
Actually that was fascinating. Both Auntie R and Uncle W were born in the early 30s and so had vivid memories of Yorkshire village life before WWII. I really must ask Uncle W to write it all down for me before it's too late. He's done a massive amount of research along with recalling his own memories and it is my own heritage. I feel closer to that side of my family than the more privileged paternal history - probably because by the time I was born all the family money had long gone so we had nothing! Once more if you wanted to say anything during the conversation though you had to be the loudest. As I've always been told off for doing that I kept quiet!
Poor old auntie has had a terrible time and I did feel bad when I had less than good niece thoughts over the four days she was with us. Not only has she lost her husband, she has also lost a cherished daughter in law very suddenly from a galloping tumour (six weeks from diagnosis to the end) and her own health has been bad too. She has 40% of her heart function remaining for no known reason. The missing 60% is dead, no bringing it back with a bypass (if she'd survive the surgery, which I doubt) and you can tell. She's always been healthy but you could really tell the difference. You could also tell that she is lonely. She has her son and grandchildren nearby but of course they have their own lives, however much time they spend with her. She goes out to play bridge two or three times a week and I think that's the only kind of socialising she does regularly. She talked non-stop, almost! And during a conversation if she wants to say something instead of waiting her turn she just turns her volume up to get her point across. My dad doesn't need any encouragement in that line so mum and I didn't get much chance to speak! And she never shut up! Even during programmes on the TV she chit chatted all the time, which was a bit irritating. We didn't really watch TV but there was a Miss Marple on that we entertained her with and a documentary about Elizabeth I and we didn't get to hear much of either. Mum is a little concerned that Auntie R's mind is going as she doesn't always get her facts right. I don't know about that as this was mainly on the Sunday when we had gone to my uncle W's and they were all reminiscing about the past.
Actually that was fascinating. Both Auntie R and Uncle W were born in the early 30s and so had vivid memories of Yorkshire village life before WWII. I really must ask Uncle W to write it all down for me before it's too late. He's done a massive amount of research along with recalling his own memories and it is my own heritage. I feel closer to that side of my family than the more privileged paternal history - probably because by the time I was born all the family money had long gone so we had nothing! Once more if you wanted to say anything during the conversation though you had to be the loudest. As I've always been told off for doing that I kept quiet!