The Modesty Survey V
There were also a couple of other answers that I either didn't agree with, felt were worded to strongly or just had a comment to make about them. Don't read if you don't wanna, this end is not as good as the previous one anyway.
1st Q
Modesty is extremely attractive in a pure and holy way. Beauty is fleeting. Inner purity is gorgeous! Guard your intimacy with God. If you can't do something in the Holy of holies, don't do it at all. Eternity is a long time. Spend it with Jesus. Start now, if you haven't already. If you're intimate with God it shows. Intimacy with God is the most attractive thing in a woman. Purity and holiness is beautiful. Impurity taints a womans outer beauty. Purposefully or willingly sinning is not forgivable. Don't play with that. Eternity is a long time. Get plugged in to a local healthy growing church, if you're not yet. Fall deeply and madly in love with your Maker. Love God. Love people. Devour the Word of God. Hunger and thirst for righteousness, and you will be filled. (Matthew 5) Those who do righteousness are righteous.(1 John 3:7) Those who do righteousness are born of God. (1 John 2:29) Prayer is for intimacy with God. Intimacy with God is the very essence and breath of life. (Age 26)
2nd Q
They make me wary and uncomfortable. The first thing I plan to consider in my wife (besides being a Christian) is whether she has pursued the battle for purity all her life. (age 14)
It actually really angers me. I find it disrespectful. I don't think they get it. Do they realize that they have just caused someone to have sexual thoughts about them in their mind? Now the guy feels bad because he fell AGAIN and the girl wiggles on her merry way. If an unsaved girl dresses this way it doesn't bother me that much, because really how would she know better? But a girl who says she is a Christian, and she says her body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. When that girl flaunts her body in a sexual way, I get really frustrated, because she should know better! Another thing I would like to know is..where is her father??!! He is a man, he knows how we think, how can he let her go out dressed like that??!! (Age 21)
If a girl is naturally physically attractive, she shouldn't try to conceal it, but neither should she seek to make herself unnaturally beautiful. Christian girls should look like they were made in the image of God, not in the image of perverse supermodels. Those who act as though their bodies belong solely to themselves to do with as they please, are offensive to me, especially those who claim to love God. It's hypocrisy really. God said, "If you love me, you will keep my commandments." Beauty and obedience are not mutually exclusive. He gave us rules concerning humility of demeanor, dress, and behavior, and if we truly love Him, we will obey Him, whatever the cost. Girls (and everyone else) must honor God with their bodies, otherwise they are hypocrites. "Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body." (I Corinthians 6:18-20) (age 17)
The difference (and really the only difference) is the heart. The Bible instructs girls to dress modestly (1 Timothy 2:9), but a modest heart is a much more common remonstration (See 1 Peter 5:5 and Colossians 3:12). Clothing plays a part in modesty, but it is only a part. Any item of clothing can be immodest. (Age 18) - Yeah, if you're not wearing it!
Something becomes immodest when the person wearing it has an attitude of carelessness. (Age 17) - I would contest this. I had thought that not dressing with an intent to flaunt, but with the mind engaged on things other than clothes full stop was fine. (Don't worry about what you shall wear, because clothes aren't important in the kingdom of God ==> where whatever you like, just don't give it too much attention [either way] ??)
A girl has been given something for which she is responsible. That gift is a beautiful body and mystique which has power over a man, and so in being responsible with that gift, a girl must give thought to men. This is just like how men have been given bodies with a different power - physical strength. A man is responsible for that strength and must not abuse it or be careless with it - be that in the context of other men and children, or with women. In relation to one another, we are responsible for the gifts and roles God has given us, the power and ability we have, and the godly attitude is to be diligent in ensuring we are responsible and not negligent. That's how we are to treat others. As for how we treat our own thoughts and men's part in this whole modesty thing - as Jesus said, he who harbors anger in his heart is guilty of murder and he who looks lustfully after a woman is guilty of adultery. No matter what a woman may be wearing, as a follower of Christ God has called me to deal responsibly as a servant of the King. In the extreme, even if a girl were to walk naked on the street (which would naturally be very appealing to look at) I have no right to gaze at her or lust. I never lose the responsibility to consider all things in the light of Christ and to honour Him and the individual not only with my actions but also with my thoughts. Lusting is something I should never do and it is my responsibility to control my mind and eyes. I am to serve and be a blessing to those around me and especially the precious women He has given us men. We are to lead, to protect, to encourage and provide. Not only do we fail to honour women when we think of them this way, but such thoughts eventually lead to weakened actions and from there, to wrong actions. The guarding of our thoughts is something every individual should take seriously. As said, a woman shouldn't make this harder for a guy - when she dresses immodestly it's almost saying, "I expect you to behave as though I were dressed perfectly modestly, but I'm not going to dress that way," - or add to an atmosphere or environment which suggests to a guy that it's okay for him to think a certain way. (Age 26) - Re that last point: is it ever ok to, if I say "deliberately test" someone, it sounds very deceptive. But if you make a suggestion of immorality and then they still respond by behaving perfectly morally, it will obviously reveal something about their character - that would be a good guy. SOME may say, it would also be a dead guy. And because it is the guy's responsibility to lead a relationship, not a girl's, if a guy did it it would be wholly inappropriate but if a girl did it, and the guy was able to steer the relationship out of that area quite effectively (without breaking up with the girl or anything like that), then is that really a problem? I suppose once you've done that it would be natural to want to see just how firm those boundaries were (stronger than his love for you, or not?), but you only really know that when the barriers break. And that's not good.... :(
Some of the answers, particularly in the first set/to the first question are "so holy they almost hurt"/"almost so holy that they hurt", although if I was really to be honnest they in fact actually be "so holy that it hurts". Spiritual growing pains. I don't necessarily like them, but I hope to God that I want them, really. I would appreciate it a lot if someone might pray about this for me please. :-)
So, thoughts?