Bits and tids

[princesofswords]

Apparently I haven't updated since I started grad school. So here are the main things going on:

• I'm teaching three classes at SF State now; Algebra 1, and two sections of a Pre-Calculus discussion section. I have a bit over 70 students total, and I'm the only person in charge of these classes. It's overwhelming at times. I always have grading to do, it seems. But my students are great. They don't always put in the effort I'd like them to, but they've never made it difficult for me to work with them, which is more than can be said about other instructors' students.
• I'm taking a teaching workshop, which is quickly teaching me that I don't want to teach. Go figure. I think it's just because worrying so much about my teaching style (which is what this class is making me do, even though I've never worried about it before) is exhausting, and I'm already tired enough as it is.
• I'm re-taking Real Analysis and as far as I can tell, I have one of the highest grades in the class so far. Everyone I've talked to is struggling with the material but compared to what I did last summer, it's a piece of cake for me. I'm aiming for an A, which will mean I can qualify for scholarships for next year and not teach anymore.
• The people in my program are a lot of fun. I think we're all generally happy with the group of first years in the program. It's nice to be making new friends for once, especially friends who are so math-nerdy. I really haven't met anyone new who I hung out with consistently in years, so this is a treat.
• I moved to Oakland and have an apartment with greatblarg and my two kitties. I'm quite happy here, but my room is never clean, and that frustrates me.
• The biggest problem in my life right now is that I am CONSTANTLY tired. I sleep in every morning, coffee doesn't wake me up, and I'm prone to napping in the middle of the day. When I'm on campus I push myself really hard, but when I'm not on campus I am so slothful. For example, I just finished cooking a big batch of Chicken Biryani and I got up to turn the stove off, but I felt too tired to get out a bowl and dish some up for myself, even though I'm hungry. I don't know what my deal is, if it's just exhaustion or a lack of motivation - probably both. This is generally accompanied by near-constant anxiety and heart palpitations, with a good strong heartflop once a day, which is not normal for me. I have a doctor's appointment next Monday and I'm going to ask to get my hormones checked, so hopefully that will answer some questions and help turn things around. Crossing my fingers.
• As always, Michael is wonderful. So so wonderful. Recently I had some of my old relationship-damaging issues come up and I was so freaked out over it, but he was so compassionate and understanding and made an effort to bring me back down to earth about us. Since I've never been in a long-term relationship like this before, I've only heard of the whole working-through-challenges-together-brings-you-closer-and-more-in-love phenomenon, but right now I'm experiencing it for the first time and it's so great. &hearts !

That's all for now, folks - time for me to attempt to grade my students' test and homework. Blegh.