one love

[princejewels]

Wow....a month has past since the valentines day that will never forget.we have gone from sun to rain,from i like you to i love you,tears,rumors,phone calls,pallets in the park at midnight.....i know now that i have never felt this way about anyone ever....not even elena which really got my head to spin. it kinda kinda wierd to think that i could have waited to have v or one of my other friends to pick the girl that i would go out with...and normally i would have agreed. but im acting so strange as far as my heart is concerned that no one is able to keep up with how i feel...so they rebel and i lose a friend....speaking of which, my uncle greg who is probly my favorite family member, got sent to jail fri for failure to appear in court over 3 felonys. he will be gone for 5 years....you have no idea how much that hurts...as far as my family goes....im alone...again. then in the same day, my brother broke into someones house and tried to steal some shit out of the house but got caught.....guess who they called.....me. i just dont understand that if im the youngest of the family...why do i have to put up with all my familys bullshit? now this may sound bad but the truth always hurts......i think ive gotten to the point where i dont have that special kind of love for my family....its just unconditional. because i just cant deal with there ignorant ghetto ass bullshit no more. and ill get the usual sayin " nigga you aint white so deal wit the nigga shit like you should" but im not in a fucked up situation any more so maybe i just shouldnt care...but if i dont then my granmother probly will end up dead, my brother in jail for life and every body lookin at me wonderin what happened...even my uncle dino is on me. the love i had for most of my family is gone. all they want me to do is make money so i can give it to them to spend on shit that i cant even say right now. and if i dont then they cop a attude and tell me what i should be doin with my money. so my question now is what will happen when i move out? will you still be as dependent on me and put the pressure on me just like you did high shcool? im tired of pressure. im tired of stereo types. im tired of being what you want me to be. so im just doin what i feel i should now and you will enjoy it cuz i only pay attention to the ones i love. sorry about the ranting but theres two reasons for this: 1 i have nothing to hide and two the most important...

other then the love i got for the man upstairs, sara is the only person i love right now with all my heart and even though i dont like sayin this, i need her. Maybe thats what happens when you only have one love...