Daylight Savings Time, you foil my plans again!
HI EVERYONE. So perhaps I will be in and out (mostly out) this week like a pesky, invisible mosquito. I want to spam a lot of awesome people (including you! yes you!) but RL is clawing at me for attention and if I ignore it any longer, I fear that my wounds will require medical attention.
In the meantime, here is a fic.
Title: This Might Have Been Easier Without the Death Ray
Rating: PG-13 for swearing
Warnings: THE STORYLINE IS KIND OF WEIRD, MAYBE.
Pairing: Ohmiya, but it's not the focus.
Summary: A story of the hilarious tragedy that is Ninomiya's life: trying to balance out school, love, stigma, arch-nemeses, and not really taking over the world city.
Genre: College AU? I... really don't know how to classify it.
Notes: a) Japan doesn't have Chancellors, I know, but "Prime Ministers" just didn't have the same ring to it. Maybe the setting isn't even Japan! As was pointed out by oviparous , the fic has a decidedly North American feel to it. I call artistic license? b) All information about lasers was obtained through browsing Wikipedia. I'm not scientist! (If this was not already obvious.) The laser in question is a hydrogen fluoride laser. c) I actually started writing this fic for the Valentine's Contest at ohmiyaday. OTL I stopped when I realized that the longer it got, the less Ohmiya it contained. That was probably the wisest decision I have ever made in my life. Anyway, this is for
pink_tofu and fluttering, who organized the contest and are therefore the reasons for this story's existence in the first place.
More notes? Inspired by Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.
MONDAY
"Nino-chan," Aiba said, coming in the room. "I'm going to the convenience store for some milk, do you want any- what are you doing?"
"I'm working," Nino said, bent low over his table. "Go away."
"What are you working on?" Aiba asked. He tried to peer over Nino's shoulder, but Nino kept blocking his view. "Do you want anything from the store?"
"I'm working on none of your business. And no. So go away."
But now Aiba's curiousity was piqued. He wrapped his arms around Nino's waist, bent his knees, and lifted.
"Hey!" Nino cried, twisting. "Aiba!" Aiba deposited him on the ratty Doraemon beanbag chair and returned to Nino's worktable. On it laid a large gun, made mostly of metal and few rubber tubes.
"Is this a water gun?" Aiba asked, picking it up.
"Don’t touch it!" Nino said, leaping across the room to grab his weapon. Aiba turned around and Nino's hands missed their target.
"I'm not going to turn it on," Aiba said, rolling his eyes. "I just want to see it."
"You don't need to use your hands to see," Nino said, reaching for the gun. Aiba held it above his head and Nino glared; using height was an unfair battle. "Give it back; you're going to break it."
"Just tell me what it is," Aiba said, stroking its shiny chrome finish.
Nino sighed. "It's a death ray."
"Oooh!" Aiba grinned, eyes lighting up. He raised the gun to eye level and mimicked shooting different things in the room: the bookcase, the whiteboard, the tool chest. "So this is the secret project you've been working on! Neat!"
"Yes, fine," Nino said, crossing his arms. "It's 'neat'. Great. Are you done now? Can you let me work in peace?"
Aiba aimed the laser at Nino. "I'm going to shoot you! Pew pew!" Nino silently put out his hand and Aiba reluctantly returned the gun.
"What are you making a death ray for anyway?" Aiba asked, following Nino back to his workstation. "I thought we were experimenting with that new gas bomb. If you're going to use all the neon for your laser what are we going to use for fluorescence?"
"I'm not touching your stupid neon," Nino replied, picking up a tiny screwdriver. "I want to power it with deuterium."
"We don't have any deuterium."
"That is why," Nino said patiently, "we are going to steal some."
Nino glanced at the clock.
"After school," he amended.
It was a tough life that Nino led, as a college student, and as a... whatever it was that Nino was. Aiba called them Defenders of Love and Justice, but they were on the wrong side of the law for that; plus, only idiots named themselves after Sailor Moon catchphrases. Nino preferred to be called an outlaw, minus the whole being kicked out of town thing. Renegade, maybe. Misunderstood genius, definitely. Anything but a juvenile delinquent, which was probably what the courts would label him, which was part of the reason why Nino resolved never to get caught -- he had a reputation to uphold.
Nino didn’t have some lame ass alter ego or anything, but being even a part-time radical type person was hard work. Sho gained great pleasure from scolding Nino for never doing any homework, but Nino didn’t like to waste his time on such menial chores; there were better things to do than drawing flow charts and reading political activism articles. Nino was political activism. Or at least political tomfoolery. Just last week, he and Aiba had released a cage of stray mice into the city council meeting, sending thirty old, balding men fleeing from their seats and clutching their pant legs as they screamed for security. It had been the funniest thing ever, and the delay of the meeting meant that they hadn’t been able to sign the by-law to reduce the number of shuttle buses driving daily to the hospital. Nino had recorded the entire camera feed onto DVD and planned to watch it whenever he needed a good laugh, twice on holidays.
See, based on Nino’s tendency to do seemingly evil deeds, some people might (mistakenly) assume that Nino was evil, but that wasn’t Nino’s intention. Nino wasn’t one of those self-righteous megalomaniacs with too much ambition and too little common sense. So maybe he wanted to upset the status quo a little bit -- was that so unreasonable? Society catered to the rich and powerful, but the problem was that Nino was none of these things, and neither was anyone else he knew. Nino only wanted to even out the playing field. So his methods were a bit unorthodox, so his motives were sometimes murky. It didn't mean that Nino was evil. If Nino was evil, then Aiba was too by default, only that was retarded and a half: Aiba was about an evil as a hamster on ecstasy.
No, Nino wasn’t evil, but he wasn’t noble, either. Nino was a handsome shade of grey. Nino was a delicate flower struggling in harsh environments, trying its best to survive. By no means was he a staunch advocate of social change or a guardian of underdogs everywhere, and he could care less about the current (large amount of) inequality that poisoned their society. Nino’s motivations were deliciously and utterly selfish: he wanted money, but since he couldn’t get money, he displaced his anger onto the people who were preventing him from getting money. So what if it was petty. It was fun.
He and Aiba usually worked small-scale, things like setting stink bombs off in bank offices, or placing a fly on a wall at some big-shot business meeting and playing Spice Girls at maximum volume. Nino’s favourite victims were stuck-up politicians. So you want to impose an evening curfew for all underage teens? Great, there go all of your prize geraniums, up in flames. You want to drive too close to the curb and splash people standing at the bus stop? Fantastic, have fun dealing with the police when your car is reported for trafficking drugs. Basically, it was a give and take sort of prank war, only Nino’s opponents didn’t know they were playing. Was it stupid? Was it immature? Yeah, probably, but Nino was a college student, not a cop. Just a measly kid who recognized when some people needed to be knocked down a few pegs.
Nino was aware that not everyone agreed with his views about the incompetency of their city council - these were the people who might call Nino “evil” - but they were probably cut from the same incompetent cloth as the council itself, so what did they know. Whatever. Nino could be handcuffed to a toilet and still make a better leader than those empty-headed, senile twits. Not that Nino wanted to be one. But if he did, he could.
He just needed to graduate first.
Nino: did you click on that link i sent?
Aiba: o yea w/ news report ab our heist? lmao the police thought it was the mafia or smth??
lololol
Nino: yeah, we did well
Aiba: (h5)
Nino: (h5)
oh, about today.
can you remember?
just the one bottle, okay? don't screw up
Aiba: im not gonna screw up
chillax
Nino: if you screw up I'm going to kill you
Aiba: dude i said chilllaaax
i got dis thing
finish my lab, loiter a bit, sneakity sneak, and tadahhhh done!
rite? eazy peazy
why dont u go hit on ohchan or smth stop bugging me im trying to take notes
Nino: no you're not you liar. I bet you're watching anime.
i do not hit on ohno
Aiba: u def do
Nino: wrong
i am friendly in a perfectly socially acceptable manner
Aiba: w/e
ur hot 4 him
nino nino ninooo kissy kissy ohchan
Nino: diaf
my class is starting, i'll talk to you later. JUST GET THE STUFF, OKAY? I really need it.
Aiba: nino
srsly
have i ever let u down b4
wait
dont answer that
Nino has logged offline.
Nino hated art history. What a waste of his only elective this semester. Why didn't he sign up for a fun course, like drama? He always got great grades in high school drama class. And it was interactive. Art history was nothing but projector slides and memorizing dates and forcing himself to see symbolism in things that Nino didn't believe held any hidden meaning beyond, "Hey, look at this thing I made, aren't I incredible?"
The professor was already on the sixth slide by the time Ohno scuttled into class, opening and closing the classroom doors with very little noise. Nino lifted up his bag from the seat beside him, and Ohno slid in it, bumping into Nino's shoulder as he took off his backpack. Nino tingled there.
"Morning," Ohno mumbled. Nino wordlessly slid over his first page of notes for Ohno to copy. "Thanks."
"Slept through your alarm again?" Nino asked quietly, still keeping one ear to the lecture.
"I forgot to set it," Ohno said.
"I thought your mom would wake you up if you were still in bed by nine."
"She left early today. She had an appointment."
"How is she?"
"Okay," Ohno answered softly.
Nino left it at that.
Aiba was misinterpreting things. Nino did not hit on Ohno. That would be crass. Ohno wasn’t just some guy who Nino found it fun to flirt with; he deserved to be treated better than that. Ohno deserved the best kind of attention. Ohno deserved butt gropes.
The thing Nino had with Ohno was complicated. Okay, sure, Nino liked him, but Nino was realistic. He could never be in a relationship with someone who didn't know about Nino's… choice of lifestyle, to be putting it mildly. (Leanings towards a life of crime, to be putting it less mildly.) Nino was of the traditional sort; he believed in sharing your ongoing secret plan to publicly embarrass your city’s leaders before starting something serious with another person. That was the proper thing to do. It was at least more preferable than letting the person find out on their own, which, worst case scenario, was by seeing a close-up of Nino’s police-beaten face on the front page of the newspaper with the headline, BOY WONDER CONVICTED! NOW JAILBAIT.
But therein lay the catch-22: Nino just couldn't go around revealing his plans to just anybody -- they were called Secret Plans for a reason.
It was a risky business, divulging your hidden depths (that might land you in jail). Other people might not be as empathetic to his situation as Aiba was - and Aiba really didn’t have a choice. Sho, for example. Nino's been friends with Sho for years and Sho still had no clue that Nino made weapons of noticeable destruction in his spare time. And Nino was fine with that. It was easier to brush Sho off with excuses like, "I can't, I'm working tonight," and "I'm a vegetarian, go on without me," and "SORRY? WHAT? THE CONNECTION IS BAD, SHO-CHAN, I CAN'T HEA--" then hang up, rather than to explain to Sho the tragic comedy that was Nino's life. Surely Sho: caring, compassionate, journalism major Sho-chan, would ask too many probing questions Nino wasn't yet willing to answer. It was one thing to know that your best friend was an amateur vigilante, but Nino feared for Sho's sanity were he ever to be dragged into Nino's twisted world.
That was actually what made Nino’s relationship with Ohno a bit on the hesitant side: Ohno was the kind of person who Nino thought could be trusted with any secret, regardless of size and scope, and judge nothing. Nino would be happy to tell Ohno his secrets, if only to see Ohno's smile light up and say, "Oh, cool, can I see your lab?" Ohno would take the news the correct way; that is, be not surprised at all. That's really all Nino wanted. Someone to know everything about Nino, whether good or bad, and just -- be fine with it, to the point that it was a non-issue, to the point that tomorrow's weather forecast would cause more interest. And Nino felt that Ohno could be that someone, was that someone. But that was shit-in-the-pants frightening. Because he might be wrong. The millions of daydreams Nino had of revealing himself to Ohno and Ohno simply accepting the news: they were all speculation, figments of Nino’s unhealthy imagination. Real life was dangerous. Real life stabbed you in the back. Nino didn’t ever want to regret telling Ohno his secrets. People came and went out of Nino’s life all the time, but if Ohno ever left, and left because of Nino, well - that would be bad, obviously.
Maybe all Nino needed was the perfect moment to let it out. Aiba was the type to do or die; he was always harping Nino to just plop himself into Ohno’s lap and grind down. “There’s no faster message gotten across than a raging boner,” Aiba often said, but Nino had standards (also, the ability to think with his brain and not his dick). Plus, Nino had the sneaking suspicion that Ohno thought he was a pretty cool guy, if the sheer amount of smiling Ohno did around Nino was any indication. Nino didn’t want to scare him off. Most importantly, he didn’t want Ohno to think Nino was evil, because Nino wasn’t. In the two years, four months and three days Nino had known Ohno, such a moment had never presented itself, but Nino had hope. Because Ohno liked to smile for Nino and Nino fantasized about groping Ohno’s butt and if that wasn’t destiny calling, then Nino didn’t know what was.
Nino took art history because of Ohno. It was the only class where he could take with Ohno and not fail, because while Nino could draw up blueprints well enough (maybe “well” was a bit of an exaggeration), he was about as artistic as the pinky finger on Ohno's left hand, and Ohno was right handed. And though Nino sat through art history grinding his teeth and imagining the professor trapped, mad, in the surrealism paintings he so worshipped, Nino always regretted how fast time went by when the class began to wrap up. He wouldn't be able to see Ohno until after Ohno's last class, if he was lucky, or tomorrow morning, if he wasn't.
And today he wasn't lucky. He had to go find Aiba, make sure that idiot hadn't hurt himself, or worse, jeopardized Nino's project.
But just as Nino turned to go to his next class, Ohno grabbed his wrist. Nino stopped.
"Can you come over tonight?" Ohno asked.
YES, was Nino's first thought.
"Sure," Nino said casually. "What for?"
"I need to do someone's portrait for my summative project," Ohno said, still holding onto Nino's arm. "I have to pick someone really important to me."
Nino's heart trilled. Did that mean that Ohno wanted Nino to --
"And I started two of my mom in different styles," Ohno continued. "I’d like your opinion about which one is better.”
Oh.
"Sounds good," Nino faked a grin, and Ohno grinned back as he waved Nino goodbye. Nino sighed, watching until Ohno was swallowed up by the crowd of students before moving away. Alright, so it wasn't a portrait. A visit home was still good. Nino rarely ever got invited over to Ohno's house. Still, for a second there, Nino had thought -- never mind.
Walking to his next class, Nino's phone beeped.
im heading 2 my lab now, so don’t fone me. call u l8ter! ps rocked fisix!!!
Sender: Aibaka
Sent: 11:33:04am, 02/09/2009
k good luck, Nino typed back. (i thought you dropped physics.)
no got midterm bak, turns out ima genis
Sender: Aibaka
Sent: 11:35:43am, 02/09/2009
genius. not penis
Sender: Aibaka
Sent: 11:35:57am, 02/09/2009
"Nino!"
Nino looked up from his cell. "Sho-chan, hey." He hurriedly closed his messages window.
Sho jogged up to him, looking excited.
"Morning," he said. "How was your weekend?”
“Normal,” Nino replied. “There was a SpongeBob marathon on TV so Aiba didn’t go on his usual city-wide hunt for stray animals. You?”
Sho grinned. “I've actually got cool news. Two pieces of news, actually. Remember that incident last week? Where a bunch of mice burst out into the city council meeting and scared the Chancellor into calling Pest Control? They found the building was clean! So somebody must have set those mice loose.”
“Is that so,” Nino said, trying to keep a straight face.
Sho frowned. “It was a serious matter, Nino, I don’t know why you and Aiba were laughing so hard about it. The council had to adjourn, and reschedule the meeting. Progress was being delayed.”
“It wasn’t good progress, anyway,” Nino shrugged, looking sideways.
Sho sighed. “Sometimes I really wonder about you. One day you hate any mention of politics and the next you can’t get soak up enough information about it.”
“I’m a beautiful, multi-layered onion,” Nino said, batting his eyelashes.
“You do make me want to cry sometimes,” Sho admitted. “But actually!” He held up a finger. “The bigger news! Did you hear? We’ve got a big shot on campus today. I haven't seen him yet, but everybody is really buzzing. A group of girls are going from classroom to classroom, trying to find him."
"Who?"
Sho glanced around them, as if checking for eavesdroppers. "The Chancellor's son,” he said.
Nino froze. "Seriously. Here?"
Sho laughed. "Yeah, that's what I thought too. I mean, we're a great school, but still. It's surprising, isn't it?"
"Why?" Nino demanded. "Why did he come?"
"No one knows yet," Sho shrugged. "Someone saw him talking with the Dean this morning, and overheard him accept an invitation to sit in a bunch of classes today. I'm going to the newspaper office now; hopefully someone there has some more details about it. Come with me," he offered.
Nino debated it. Did he really want to go learn about Ethics and Society? He always ended up sleeping through the two hours anyway.
"Sure," Nino agreed. He had to admit, he was a bit curious about this sudden visit from the city's golden boy. In this town, people that rich never stepped foot onto public school grounds; they never had reason to. Why would the Chancellor’s son be interested in their university? He was probably planning to make a huge, fat, donation to get a hall or auditorium named after him, Nino thought bitterly. If there was one thing the Chancellor's office was good at, it was throwing money at things to get what they wanted.
"Do you think we'll see him?" Sho asked eagerly. His eyes were already bright with thoughts of potential material for his future articles.
Nino frowned. "I would rather die."
"Nino," Sho said gently. "You can't possibly be mad at him for the policies his father made, can you? For all we know, he might be actively trying to change them. Maybe that's why he's here. To get some opinions from the next generation."
"Don't get your hopes up," Nino muttered. "If you're such a fan, why don't you go join the stalkfest?"
"I'm not getting my hopes up," Sho sighed. "I'm just not as pessimistic as you. But then, I guess I don't have the right to be." He squeezed Nino's shoulder, briefly, and tactfully changed the subject.
Nino's reasons for hating the Chancellor, and the Chancellor's son, were twofold.
One, the Chancellor had corrupted his entire cabinet. The legislations they passed were the reason why Nino's grandfather and Ohno's mother could not afford to pay their medical bills and were forced to work, even while sick. They were the reason why Aiba's family had to sell their restaurant, their home, in order to send Aiba to university. And while Nino was not as irrational as to believe that he could blame the Chancellor for the car crash that killed both his and Aiba's parents (although he would like to), he could sure as hell blame him for the lack of monetary and social support given to the city's orphans and less unfortunate.
Two, that no good goody-two-shoes of a son of his kept on upstaging Nino and Aiba's brilliant heists. Every time they pulled off some amazing prank (Nino called them pranks; Aiba called them bonding activities), the Chancellor's son would step in oh so casually and make a donation to reimburse whatever was stolen or repair whatever was broken, "in order to protect our citizens from the loathsome deeds that are the scum of the city." When Nino had first heard that press statement on the evening news, accompanied by the speaker's blindingly white smile and perfect hair being artfully ruffled in the wind, he'd nearly thrown a vial of acid at the television set. Scum of the city? Scum? Scum was a word reserved for ignorant fools who focused on only the superficial layer of social issues and made no attempts to probe beneath the exterior to find out why the problems had arrived in the first place. Scum? Nino was breaking the law, sure, but he did it with finesse. Shouldn't he get some sort of recognition for that? A word with two syllables, at least.
Nino was an anti-hero. Outlaw. Renegade. Or something. Why did people insist on labeling others anyway? The point was that Ninomiya Kazunari was the protagonist of Ninomiya Kazunari's life, Aiba was his trusted yet bumbling sidekick, and the Chancellor's son was Nino's arch nemesis. Logically it should actually be the Chancellor, but come on: the Chancellor's son was Nino's age.
So what if everyone thought the guy was the greatest thing since the dawn of man. Nino knew better: he didn't fall for that compassionate-eyes-great-teeth bullshit. The kid was an attention hog, and nothing else.
"Everyone, I'm extremely honoured and privileged to introduce our special guest today," the professor started, and the class immediately broke out into whispers. There were a few muffled squeals from the girls, while all the guys sat up straighter in their seats. Nino rolled his eyes and slunk down in his chair. Just his stupid luck. Why, he berated himself, why in the world did he leave Sho's office? Sho's office had candy and video games (hidden in the bottom of his filing cabinet, but Nino knew where the key was), Sho's office had Sho, and Sho's office was free from fancy-pants princes and their accompanying love struck fans.
"Now now, students," the professor said, rapping on his podium for attention, "calm down, calm down." Some girl up front was hyperventilating, grabbing her chest, eyes big as saucers. "I suppose there's no use delaying it, since you all seem to know exactly who I'm referring to," the professor smiled. "Our Chancellor's son was very kind to bestow a visit to our university today, and we're even more fortunate to have him attend this class. Please, give a warm welcome to Matsumoto Jun-san."
The side door opened and someone walked in; Nino didn't get a good look because everyone stood up in unison, applauding -- and Nino was faced with a sea of butts.
"Thank you very much for allowing me to sit in with you all today," said the voice from Nino's nightmares. "Please, I ask that you treat me as a regular student. I'm here to learn, the same as you."
Nino snorted. The guy sounded so practiced; he must have said the same thing to every class he'd visited today.
The professor rapped for attention and the students sat back down, still whispering excitedly. Nino doodled lasers in the margin of his notebook, drew them shooting a stick figure with a crown on his head. Two x's for eyes and a tongue hanging out and --
"Nice," someone right next to him said. Nino nearly jumped out of his seat. He turned around.
Matsumoto Jun raised his perfectly waxed eyebrows in greeting. "You could be a professional, with that sort of skill,” he said, nodding to Nino’s scribbles.
"Are you fucking kidding me," Nino swore. The guy decided to sit here, of all places?
"It was a joke, yes," Matsumoto smirked, and deliberately made a show of turning his attention back to the lecture.
"Now you've got to be kidding me," Nino repeated. No one thought they were that hot.
"Quiet back there!" the professor yelled. Nino ducked his head in apology. Matsumoto Jun's face remained perfectly composed.
Nino picked up his red pen and started making his drawing as bloody as possible.
Nino: Sho. He's sitting beside me, right now.
Sho: Who is?
Nino: Three guesses, Einstein. you're the one with the A+ average.
Sho: no way! seriously?? Right beside you??
no wait
you're lying.
I just saw that gang of girls run off to the cafeteria.
woah I almost believed you.
Nino: i can take a picture of him with my phone if you want
if he asks why I'll just tell him that my friend's gay for him
Sho: dammit, no way!!
you're being serious.
Nino
ask him for an interview please?
Nino: hell no, i'm not talking to him
Sho: Nino if you get me an interview with him I will buy you dinner for a week.
Nino: there is no amount of incentive you could offer me to willingly start a conversation with prissy mcpriss over there
let alone ask him for a favour
Sho: two weeks.
Nino: 3
Sho: f u. no. two
Nino: 4
Sho: fine three
Nino: 5
A piece of paper slid across Nino's desk from the person in question. It said, I can see what you're writing, you know. He didn't look too pleased about it, either.
Nino glared at Jun and kept on typing.
Nino: excuse me but
you are being incredibly rude
reading other ppl's private conversations
have you no manners?
stop reading this, right now
aren't you supposed to be paying attention to the lecture?
don't give me that look, i know this stuff like the back of my hand
rolling your eyes, eh? think u’re hot stuff
go sit with your fanclub then
oh ho! guess even you can see how creepy they are
what's with that frown?
Prissy mcpriss? you don't like it eh
PRISSY MCPRISS
PRISSSSYYYYYYY MCPRRRHDuewqqqqqqq
Sho: wtf
Nino is experiencing technical difficulties that are preventing his chats from being sent.
The second class ended, Nino grabbed his stuff and left. What Nino did not expect was for Matsumoto Jun to follow.
"Hey, you," he called. Nino ignored him.
"I'm talking to you! Hey!"
Nino whirled around. "Look," he said, as patiently as he could, "it was one thing to read my conversation with my friend, but was it really necessary for you to close my laptop?"
Jun crossed his arms. "It’s a laptop - you weren’t going to lose any information. And I had valid reason, you two were gossiping about me."
"Oh, I was not," Nino said. "How do you know I wasn't talking about the person sitting on my other side?"
"You called me Prissy McPriss!"
"So you automatically think I meant you, huh," Nino smirked.
"What's your name?" Jun asked abruptly.
"What's yours?" Nino retorted.
Jun gave a short laugh. "It's Matsumoto." He walked up to Nino and peered at him closely. Nino stamped down his reflex to turn away. "You look familiar," Jun said.
Shit, Nino thought. That wasn't good.
"I get that a lot," Nino lied smoothly. "I've got one of those really average faces, so my mom used to tell me."
"I see," Jun said, but he still looked skeptical.
Nino shifted his feet. Just say anything, he told himself. Anything to make him leave. Nino wanted this conversation to end. "I mean, Matsumoto-san must see so many people everyday, it's quite possible you've come across many people who look alike, right?"
"Why the politeness all of the sudden?" Jun laughed. "It was more interesting when you were being rude to me."
"What?" Nino said.
Jun glanced at his watch. "I have to go, but I apologize for that laptop thing. I know people talk about me, but you were being so obvious about it, it kind of pissed me off. Right, well. It was nice to meet you." He strode away, jacket flapping like a model's.
Nino belatedly realized that he just missed the perfect opportunity to ask Jun for Sho's interview. Alright. Something else that Sho could never find out.
Okay, so maybe Nino should have expected Jun to sort of recognize him. They'd crossed each other’s paths lots of times. In fact, way too many times for Nino's liking. Nino looked familiar because Nino liked to go to the scene of his crime to see how the events played out, which was where, inevitably, police and news reporters would show up. More often than not, Jun would show up too. Nino always stood near the back of the crowd, but he could tell when Jun arrived because the crowd would ripple and quiet to hear him speak. Jun would then find a slightly elevated place to stand on and make an elaborate speech talking about how much he regretted whatever incident it was, what he was planning to do to help, so on and so forth, blah blah blah. Nino hated that, how in less than five minutes, the little civil unrest he'd so painstakingly created got completely glossed over by Jun's promises of better days and sunny horizons. Nino stood near the back of the crowd and tried to assassinate Matsumoto Jun with his mind.
But Jun was never supposed to have noticed Nino; Nino had always assumed that Jun was the type who couldn’t see past the end of his own nose. But if Jun had noticed Nino at each of the settings - he might figure it out. That it was more than a coincidence that Nino was always there. Maybe Jun suspected. Maybe Jun knew. Why was he on campus? Dammit, Nino thought. This week was off to a terrible start.
Nino couldn’t find Aiba. He wasn't answering his texts so Nino called him. The line rang for a long time before Aiba finally answered with a hushed voice.
"Nino, you got me in trouble, we're not allowed cell phones in here."
"Where the hell are you?" Nino demanded. "I went to your lab building and got blocked by the campus security and there was a paramedic truck outside. What the fuck happened?"
"I'm okay," Aiba reassured him. "It wasn't me. I mean, it was me, but I'm fine. I just came to the clinic with Yuna-chan, that's where I am now, waiting outside her room, because I felt bad."
"What did you do?! If you tell me you spilt acid on yourself again, I swear I'll --"
"No, that wasn't it! I was mixing a solution in a flask and forgot to let out the gas. Yuna-chan leaned in to see what was the matter, because it was hissing, right? Then bang! The stopper shot up! Bang, right into her eye!"
"She wasn't wearing safety glasses?"
"She was, she was! But she was surprised, right? She tripped back into a bunch of other students and everyone fell down and crashed into each other and there were a ton of things broken."
Why wasn’t Nino surprised? "You realize this is all your fault, right?" he said, rubbing his face. "But you're okay?"
"I'm totally okay. But Yuna-chan cut up her hands a bit. And I feel guilty, so I'm here. As moral support."
Nino frowned. "And? How long are you planning to stay there?"
"Huh? Why? Oh. Um."
"It's almost five now," Nino said. "The laboratory materials room is locked after classes. You'll have to leave now if you're going to get there in time."
Aiba was silent.
"Aiba!" Nino cried. "The deuterium is only accessible today; they're going to use it all for that stupid research tomorrow! And then the school won't get anymore until it gets another grant or whatever! And who knows when that will be!"
"I know, I know! I'm sorry, Nino-chan," Aiba said. "But -- I caused a big mess today, so..." he trailed off.
Nino groaned. Why was he friends with such an idiot? He should've done everything himself, this morning. "Fine, fine. You stay there, I'll go get it."
"Great!" Aiba agreed quickly. "Come get me afterwards, okay? I have to go, the nurse is really glaring at me. Bye!"
Nino sighed.
His fingers were numb as Nino mechanically dialed out another number (he rarely, so rarely, got to use it, but he'd memorized it pretty much the second he'd gotten it). God, he thought. How did things turn out like this? What horrible timing. Why did that guy have to invite Nino over today of all days?
The line picked up. "Hello?"
"Hi Oh-chan," Nino murmured. This was one call that Nino never thought he'd be making in his life: bailing out on a da-- a meeting, a meeting -- with Ohno.
"Nino?" Ohno said softly. Nino tried not to melt.
"Hey, about going to your house today?" Nino asked.
"Oh, yeah. Do you want to meet now?"
"Oh-chan, I can't come today," Nino cringed. "I'm really sorry. Aiba did something really stupid, and I have to go make sure he's all right." There, that wasn't lying. "Maybe I can come by tomorrow instead?"
"Aiba-chan? Is he okay?"
"He's fine," Nino said regretfully.
"If Nino can't make it, it's okay," Ohno said. "It's not that important, I think."
"No, Oh-chan," Nino rushed. "I really wanted to go and see your art. Really. I love your art. And I want you to get a great mark for your project."
Ohno laughed. "Yeah, maybe next time then. ...but the project is due soon, so maybe I'll ask -- hm?" There was the distant overlap of voices, muffled through Ohno's hand covering the receiver. Nino waited.
"Nino?" Ohno said, after a moment. "Don't worry about me, Jun-kun just offered to help. I'll see you in class tomorrow. Take care of Aiba-chan! Bye bye."
Ohno hung up.
"What?" Nino said dully. Jun-kun? He couldn't possibly mean --
No. Freaking. Way.
Nino snuck into the lab materials room. Nino stole one thermos of deuterium. Nino doubled back on his way out and also took a small vial of hydrochloric acid. The next time he caught Jun's face on the television he was going to need something to throw.
part two
Thank you for reading! I will try to get the next part up by Tuesday, but I am not swearing with blood or anything, okay. It's up!
In the meantime, here is a fic.
Title: This Might Have Been Easier Without the Death Ray
Rating: PG-13 for swearing
Warnings: THE STORYLINE IS KIND OF WEIRD, MAYBE.
Pairing: Ohmiya, but it's not the focus.
Summary: A story of the hilarious tragedy that is Ninomiya's life: trying to balance out school, love, stigma, arch-nemeses, and not really taking over the world city.
Genre: College AU? I... really don't know how to classify it.
Notes: a) Japan doesn't have Chancellors, I know, but "Prime Ministers" just didn't have the same ring to it. Maybe the setting isn't even Japan! As was pointed out by oviparous , the fic has a decidedly North American feel to it. I call artistic license? b) All information about lasers was obtained through browsing Wikipedia. I'm not scientist! (If this was not already obvious.) The laser in question is a hydrogen fluoride laser. c) I actually started writing this fic for the Valentine's Contest at ohmiyaday. OTL I stopped when I realized that the longer it got, the less Ohmiya it contained. That was probably the wisest decision I have ever made in my life. Anyway, this is for
pink_tofu and fluttering, who organized the contest and are therefore the reasons for this story's existence in the first place.
More notes? Inspired by Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.
MONDAY
"Nino-chan," Aiba said, coming in the room. "I'm going to the convenience store for some milk, do you want any- what are you doing?"
"I'm working," Nino said, bent low over his table. "Go away."
"What are you working on?" Aiba asked. He tried to peer over Nino's shoulder, but Nino kept blocking his view. "Do you want anything from the store?"
"I'm working on none of your business. And no. So go away."
But now Aiba's curiousity was piqued. He wrapped his arms around Nino's waist, bent his knees, and lifted.
"Hey!" Nino cried, twisting. "Aiba!" Aiba deposited him on the ratty Doraemon beanbag chair and returned to Nino's worktable. On it laid a large gun, made mostly of metal and few rubber tubes.
"Is this a water gun?" Aiba asked, picking it up.
"Don’t touch it!" Nino said, leaping across the room to grab his weapon. Aiba turned around and Nino's hands missed their target.
"I'm not going to turn it on," Aiba said, rolling his eyes. "I just want to see it."
"You don't need to use your hands to see," Nino said, reaching for the gun. Aiba held it above his head and Nino glared; using height was an unfair battle. "Give it back; you're going to break it."
"Just tell me what it is," Aiba said, stroking its shiny chrome finish.
Nino sighed. "It's a death ray."
"Oooh!" Aiba grinned, eyes lighting up. He raised the gun to eye level and mimicked shooting different things in the room: the bookcase, the whiteboard, the tool chest. "So this is the secret project you've been working on! Neat!"
"Yes, fine," Nino said, crossing his arms. "It's 'neat'. Great. Are you done now? Can you let me work in peace?"
Aiba aimed the laser at Nino. "I'm going to shoot you! Pew pew!" Nino silently put out his hand and Aiba reluctantly returned the gun.
"What are you making a death ray for anyway?" Aiba asked, following Nino back to his workstation. "I thought we were experimenting with that new gas bomb. If you're going to use all the neon for your laser what are we going to use for fluorescence?"
"I'm not touching your stupid neon," Nino replied, picking up a tiny screwdriver. "I want to power it with deuterium."
"We don't have any deuterium."
"That is why," Nino said patiently, "we are going to steal some."
Nino glanced at the clock.
"After school," he amended.
It was a tough life that Nino led, as a college student, and as a... whatever it was that Nino was. Aiba called them Defenders of Love and Justice, but they were on the wrong side of the law for that; plus, only idiots named themselves after Sailor Moon catchphrases. Nino preferred to be called an outlaw, minus the whole being kicked out of town thing. Renegade, maybe. Misunderstood genius, definitely. Anything but a juvenile delinquent, which was probably what the courts would label him, which was part of the reason why Nino resolved never to get caught -- he had a reputation to uphold.
Nino didn’t have some lame ass alter ego or anything, but being even a part-time radical type person was hard work. Sho gained great pleasure from scolding Nino for never doing any homework, but Nino didn’t like to waste his time on such menial chores; there were better things to do than drawing flow charts and reading political activism articles. Nino was political activism. Or at least political tomfoolery. Just last week, he and Aiba had released a cage of stray mice into the city council meeting, sending thirty old, balding men fleeing from their seats and clutching their pant legs as they screamed for security. It had been the funniest thing ever, and the delay of the meeting meant that they hadn’t been able to sign the by-law to reduce the number of shuttle buses driving daily to the hospital. Nino had recorded the entire camera feed onto DVD and planned to watch it whenever he needed a good laugh, twice on holidays.
See, based on Nino’s tendency to do seemingly evil deeds, some people might (mistakenly) assume that Nino was evil, but that wasn’t Nino’s intention. Nino wasn’t one of those self-righteous megalomaniacs with too much ambition and too little common sense. So maybe he wanted to upset the status quo a little bit -- was that so unreasonable? Society catered to the rich and powerful, but the problem was that Nino was none of these things, and neither was anyone else he knew. Nino only wanted to even out the playing field. So his methods were a bit unorthodox, so his motives were sometimes murky. It didn't mean that Nino was evil. If Nino was evil, then Aiba was too by default, only that was retarded and a half: Aiba was about an evil as a hamster on ecstasy.
No, Nino wasn’t evil, but he wasn’t noble, either. Nino was a handsome shade of grey. Nino was a delicate flower struggling in harsh environments, trying its best to survive. By no means was he a staunch advocate of social change or a guardian of underdogs everywhere, and he could care less about the current (large amount of) inequality that poisoned their society. Nino’s motivations were deliciously and utterly selfish: he wanted money, but since he couldn’t get money, he displaced his anger onto the people who were preventing him from getting money. So what if it was petty. It was fun.
He and Aiba usually worked small-scale, things like setting stink bombs off in bank offices, or placing a fly on a wall at some big-shot business meeting and playing Spice Girls at maximum volume. Nino’s favourite victims were stuck-up politicians. So you want to impose an evening curfew for all underage teens? Great, there go all of your prize geraniums, up in flames. You want to drive too close to the curb and splash people standing at the bus stop? Fantastic, have fun dealing with the police when your car is reported for trafficking drugs. Basically, it was a give and take sort of prank war, only Nino’s opponents didn’t know they were playing. Was it stupid? Was it immature? Yeah, probably, but Nino was a college student, not a cop. Just a measly kid who recognized when some people needed to be knocked down a few pegs.
Nino was aware that not everyone agreed with his views about the incompetency of their city council - these were the people who might call Nino “evil” - but they were probably cut from the same incompetent cloth as the council itself, so what did they know. Whatever. Nino could be handcuffed to a toilet and still make a better leader than those empty-headed, senile twits. Not that Nino wanted to be one. But if he did, he could.
He just needed to graduate first.
Nino: did you click on that link i sent?
Aiba: o yea w/ news report ab our heist? lmao the police thought it was the mafia or smth??
lololol
Nino: yeah, we did well
Aiba: (h5)
Nino: (h5)
oh, about today.
can you remember?
just the one bottle, okay? don't screw up
Aiba: im not gonna screw up
chillax
Nino: if you screw up I'm going to kill you
Aiba: dude i said chilllaaax
i got dis thing
finish my lab, loiter a bit, sneakity sneak, and tadahhhh done!
rite? eazy peazy
why dont u go hit on ohchan or smth stop bugging me im trying to take notes
Nino: no you're not you liar. I bet you're watching anime.
i do not hit on ohno
Aiba: u def do
Nino: wrong
i am friendly in a perfectly socially acceptable manner
Aiba: w/e
ur hot 4 him
nino nino ninooo kissy kissy ohchan
Nino: diaf
my class is starting, i'll talk to you later. JUST GET THE STUFF, OKAY? I really need it.
Aiba: nino
srsly
have i ever let u down b4
wait
dont answer that
Nino has logged offline.
Nino hated art history. What a waste of his only elective this semester. Why didn't he sign up for a fun course, like drama? He always got great grades in high school drama class. And it was interactive. Art history was nothing but projector slides and memorizing dates and forcing himself to see symbolism in things that Nino didn't believe held any hidden meaning beyond, "Hey, look at this thing I made, aren't I incredible?"
The professor was already on the sixth slide by the time Ohno scuttled into class, opening and closing the classroom doors with very little noise. Nino lifted up his bag from the seat beside him, and Ohno slid in it, bumping into Nino's shoulder as he took off his backpack. Nino tingled there.
"Morning," Ohno mumbled. Nino wordlessly slid over his first page of notes for Ohno to copy. "Thanks."
"Slept through your alarm again?" Nino asked quietly, still keeping one ear to the lecture.
"I forgot to set it," Ohno said.
"I thought your mom would wake you up if you were still in bed by nine."
"She left early today. She had an appointment."
"How is she?"
"Okay," Ohno answered softly.
Nino left it at that.
Aiba was misinterpreting things. Nino did not hit on Ohno. That would be crass. Ohno wasn’t just some guy who Nino found it fun to flirt with; he deserved to be treated better than that. Ohno deserved the best kind of attention. Ohno deserved butt gropes.
The thing Nino had with Ohno was complicated. Okay, sure, Nino liked him, but Nino was realistic. He could never be in a relationship with someone who didn't know about Nino's… choice of lifestyle, to be putting it mildly. (Leanings towards a life of crime, to be putting it less mildly.) Nino was of the traditional sort; he believed in sharing your ongoing secret plan to publicly embarrass your city’s leaders before starting something serious with another person. That was the proper thing to do. It was at least more preferable than letting the person find out on their own, which, worst case scenario, was by seeing a close-up of Nino’s police-beaten face on the front page of the newspaper with the headline, BOY WONDER CONVICTED! NOW JAILBAIT.
But therein lay the catch-22: Nino just couldn't go around revealing his plans to just anybody -- they were called Secret Plans for a reason.
It was a risky business, divulging your hidden depths (that might land you in jail). Other people might not be as empathetic to his situation as Aiba was - and Aiba really didn’t have a choice. Sho, for example. Nino's been friends with Sho for years and Sho still had no clue that Nino made weapons of noticeable destruction in his spare time. And Nino was fine with that. It was easier to brush Sho off with excuses like, "I can't, I'm working tonight," and "I'm a vegetarian, go on without me," and "SORRY? WHAT? THE CONNECTION IS BAD, SHO-CHAN, I CAN'T HEA--" then hang up, rather than to explain to Sho the tragic comedy that was Nino's life. Surely Sho: caring, compassionate, journalism major Sho-chan, would ask too many probing questions Nino wasn't yet willing to answer. It was one thing to know that your best friend was an amateur vigilante, but Nino feared for Sho's sanity were he ever to be dragged into Nino's twisted world.
That was actually what made Nino’s relationship with Ohno a bit on the hesitant side: Ohno was the kind of person who Nino thought could be trusted with any secret, regardless of size and scope, and judge nothing. Nino would be happy to tell Ohno his secrets, if only to see Ohno's smile light up and say, "Oh, cool, can I see your lab?" Ohno would take the news the correct way; that is, be not surprised at all. That's really all Nino wanted. Someone to know everything about Nino, whether good or bad, and just -- be fine with it, to the point that it was a non-issue, to the point that tomorrow's weather forecast would cause more interest. And Nino felt that Ohno could be that someone, was that someone. But that was shit-in-the-pants frightening. Because he might be wrong. The millions of daydreams Nino had of revealing himself to Ohno and Ohno simply accepting the news: they were all speculation, figments of Nino’s unhealthy imagination. Real life was dangerous. Real life stabbed you in the back. Nino didn’t ever want to regret telling Ohno his secrets. People came and went out of Nino’s life all the time, but if Ohno ever left, and left because of Nino, well - that would be bad, obviously.
Maybe all Nino needed was the perfect moment to let it out. Aiba was the type to do or die; he was always harping Nino to just plop himself into Ohno’s lap and grind down. “There’s no faster message gotten across than a raging boner,” Aiba often said, but Nino had standards (also, the ability to think with his brain and not his dick). Plus, Nino had the sneaking suspicion that Ohno thought he was a pretty cool guy, if the sheer amount of smiling Ohno did around Nino was any indication. Nino didn’t want to scare him off. Most importantly, he didn’t want Ohno to think Nino was evil, because Nino wasn’t. In the two years, four months and three days Nino had known Ohno, such a moment had never presented itself, but Nino had hope. Because Ohno liked to smile for Nino and Nino fantasized about groping Ohno’s butt and if that wasn’t destiny calling, then Nino didn’t know what was.
Nino took art history because of Ohno. It was the only class where he could take with Ohno and not fail, because while Nino could draw up blueprints well enough (maybe “well” was a bit of an exaggeration), he was about as artistic as the pinky finger on Ohno's left hand, and Ohno was right handed. And though Nino sat through art history grinding his teeth and imagining the professor trapped, mad, in the surrealism paintings he so worshipped, Nino always regretted how fast time went by when the class began to wrap up. He wouldn't be able to see Ohno until after Ohno's last class, if he was lucky, or tomorrow morning, if he wasn't.
And today he wasn't lucky. He had to go find Aiba, make sure that idiot hadn't hurt himself, or worse, jeopardized Nino's project.
But just as Nino turned to go to his next class, Ohno grabbed his wrist. Nino stopped.
"Can you come over tonight?" Ohno asked.
YES, was Nino's first thought.
"Sure," Nino said casually. "What for?"
"I need to do someone's portrait for my summative project," Ohno said, still holding onto Nino's arm. "I have to pick someone really important to me."
Nino's heart trilled. Did that mean that Ohno wanted Nino to --
"And I started two of my mom in different styles," Ohno continued. "I’d like your opinion about which one is better.”
Oh.
"Sounds good," Nino faked a grin, and Ohno grinned back as he waved Nino goodbye. Nino sighed, watching until Ohno was swallowed up by the crowd of students before moving away. Alright, so it wasn't a portrait. A visit home was still good. Nino rarely ever got invited over to Ohno's house. Still, for a second there, Nino had thought -- never mind.
Walking to his next class, Nino's phone beeped.
im heading 2 my lab now, so don’t fone me. call u l8ter! ps rocked fisix!!!
Sender: Aibaka
Sent: 11:33:04am, 02/09/2009
k good luck, Nino typed back. (i thought you dropped physics.)
no got midterm bak, turns out ima genis
Sender: Aibaka
Sent: 11:35:43am, 02/09/2009
genius. not penis
Sender: Aibaka
Sent: 11:35:57am, 02/09/2009
"Nino!"
Nino looked up from his cell. "Sho-chan, hey." He hurriedly closed his messages window.
Sho jogged up to him, looking excited.
"Morning," he said. "How was your weekend?”
“Normal,” Nino replied. “There was a SpongeBob marathon on TV so Aiba didn’t go on his usual city-wide hunt for stray animals. You?”
Sho grinned. “I've actually got cool news. Two pieces of news, actually. Remember that incident last week? Where a bunch of mice burst out into the city council meeting and scared the Chancellor into calling Pest Control? They found the building was clean! So somebody must have set those mice loose.”
“Is that so,” Nino said, trying to keep a straight face.
Sho frowned. “It was a serious matter, Nino, I don’t know why you and Aiba were laughing so hard about it. The council had to adjourn, and reschedule the meeting. Progress was being delayed.”
“It wasn’t good progress, anyway,” Nino shrugged, looking sideways.
Sho sighed. “Sometimes I really wonder about you. One day you hate any mention of politics and the next you can’t get soak up enough information about it.”
“I’m a beautiful, multi-layered onion,” Nino said, batting his eyelashes.
“You do make me want to cry sometimes,” Sho admitted. “But actually!” He held up a finger. “The bigger news! Did you hear? We’ve got a big shot on campus today. I haven't seen him yet, but everybody is really buzzing. A group of girls are going from classroom to classroom, trying to find him."
"Who?"
Sho glanced around them, as if checking for eavesdroppers. "The Chancellor's son,” he said.
Nino froze. "Seriously. Here?"
Sho laughed. "Yeah, that's what I thought too. I mean, we're a great school, but still. It's surprising, isn't it?"
"Why?" Nino demanded. "Why did he come?"
"No one knows yet," Sho shrugged. "Someone saw him talking with the Dean this morning, and overheard him accept an invitation to sit in a bunch of classes today. I'm going to the newspaper office now; hopefully someone there has some more details about it. Come with me," he offered.
Nino debated it. Did he really want to go learn about Ethics and Society? He always ended up sleeping through the two hours anyway.
"Sure," Nino agreed. He had to admit, he was a bit curious about this sudden visit from the city's golden boy. In this town, people that rich never stepped foot onto public school grounds; they never had reason to. Why would the Chancellor’s son be interested in their university? He was probably planning to make a huge, fat, donation to get a hall or auditorium named after him, Nino thought bitterly. If there was one thing the Chancellor's office was good at, it was throwing money at things to get what they wanted.
"Do you think we'll see him?" Sho asked eagerly. His eyes were already bright with thoughts of potential material for his future articles.
Nino frowned. "I would rather die."
"Nino," Sho said gently. "You can't possibly be mad at him for the policies his father made, can you? For all we know, he might be actively trying to change them. Maybe that's why he's here. To get some opinions from the next generation."
"Don't get your hopes up," Nino muttered. "If you're such a fan, why don't you go join the stalkfest?"
"I'm not getting my hopes up," Sho sighed. "I'm just not as pessimistic as you. But then, I guess I don't have the right to be." He squeezed Nino's shoulder, briefly, and tactfully changed the subject.
Nino's reasons for hating the Chancellor, and the Chancellor's son, were twofold.
One, the Chancellor had corrupted his entire cabinet. The legislations they passed were the reason why Nino's grandfather and Ohno's mother could not afford to pay their medical bills and were forced to work, even while sick. They were the reason why Aiba's family had to sell their restaurant, their home, in order to send Aiba to university. And while Nino was not as irrational as to believe that he could blame the Chancellor for the car crash that killed both his and Aiba's parents (although he would like to), he could sure as hell blame him for the lack of monetary and social support given to the city's orphans and less unfortunate.
Two, that no good goody-two-shoes of a son of his kept on upstaging Nino and Aiba's brilliant heists. Every time they pulled off some amazing prank (Nino called them pranks; Aiba called them bonding activities), the Chancellor's son would step in oh so casually and make a donation to reimburse whatever was stolen or repair whatever was broken, "in order to protect our citizens from the loathsome deeds that are the scum of the city." When Nino had first heard that press statement on the evening news, accompanied by the speaker's blindingly white smile and perfect hair being artfully ruffled in the wind, he'd nearly thrown a vial of acid at the television set. Scum of the city? Scum? Scum was a word reserved for ignorant fools who focused on only the superficial layer of social issues and made no attempts to probe beneath the exterior to find out why the problems had arrived in the first place. Scum? Nino was breaking the law, sure, but he did it with finesse. Shouldn't he get some sort of recognition for that? A word with two syllables, at least.
Nino was an anti-hero. Outlaw. Renegade. Or something. Why did people insist on labeling others anyway? The point was that Ninomiya Kazunari was the protagonist of Ninomiya Kazunari's life, Aiba was his trusted yet bumbling sidekick, and the Chancellor's son was Nino's arch nemesis. Logically it should actually be the Chancellor, but come on: the Chancellor's son was Nino's age.
So what if everyone thought the guy was the greatest thing since the dawn of man. Nino knew better: he didn't fall for that compassionate-eyes-great-teeth bullshit. The kid was an attention hog, and nothing else.
"Everyone, I'm extremely honoured and privileged to introduce our special guest today," the professor started, and the class immediately broke out into whispers. There were a few muffled squeals from the girls, while all the guys sat up straighter in their seats. Nino rolled his eyes and slunk down in his chair. Just his stupid luck. Why, he berated himself, why in the world did he leave Sho's office? Sho's office had candy and video games (hidden in the bottom of his filing cabinet, but Nino knew where the key was), Sho's office had Sho, and Sho's office was free from fancy-pants princes and their accompanying love struck fans.
"Now now, students," the professor said, rapping on his podium for attention, "calm down, calm down." Some girl up front was hyperventilating, grabbing her chest, eyes big as saucers. "I suppose there's no use delaying it, since you all seem to know exactly who I'm referring to," the professor smiled. "Our Chancellor's son was very kind to bestow a visit to our university today, and we're even more fortunate to have him attend this class. Please, give a warm welcome to Matsumoto Jun-san."
The side door opened and someone walked in; Nino didn't get a good look because everyone stood up in unison, applauding -- and Nino was faced with a sea of butts.
"Thank you very much for allowing me to sit in with you all today," said the voice from Nino's nightmares. "Please, I ask that you treat me as a regular student. I'm here to learn, the same as you."
Nino snorted. The guy sounded so practiced; he must have said the same thing to every class he'd visited today.
The professor rapped for attention and the students sat back down, still whispering excitedly. Nino doodled lasers in the margin of his notebook, drew them shooting a stick figure with a crown on his head. Two x's for eyes and a tongue hanging out and --
"Nice," someone right next to him said. Nino nearly jumped out of his seat. He turned around.
Matsumoto Jun raised his perfectly waxed eyebrows in greeting. "You could be a professional, with that sort of skill,” he said, nodding to Nino’s scribbles.
"Are you fucking kidding me," Nino swore. The guy decided to sit here, of all places?
"It was a joke, yes," Matsumoto smirked, and deliberately made a show of turning his attention back to the lecture.
"Now you've got to be kidding me," Nino repeated. No one thought they were that hot.
"Quiet back there!" the professor yelled. Nino ducked his head in apology. Matsumoto Jun's face remained perfectly composed.
Nino picked up his red pen and started making his drawing as bloody as possible.
Nino: Sho. He's sitting beside me, right now.
Sho: Who is?
Nino: Three guesses, Einstein. you're the one with the A+ average.
Sho: no way! seriously?? Right beside you??
no wait
you're lying.
I just saw that gang of girls run off to the cafeteria.
woah I almost believed you.
Nino: i can take a picture of him with my phone if you want
if he asks why I'll just tell him that my friend's gay for him
Sho: dammit, no way!!
you're being serious.
Nino
ask him for an interview please?
Nino: hell no, i'm not talking to him
Sho: Nino if you get me an interview with him I will buy you dinner for a week.
Nino: there is no amount of incentive you could offer me to willingly start a conversation with prissy mcpriss over there
let alone ask him for a favour
Sho: two weeks.
Nino: 3
Sho: f u. no. two
Nino: 4
Sho: fine three
Nino: 5
A piece of paper slid across Nino's desk from the person in question. It said, I can see what you're writing, you know. He didn't look too pleased about it, either.
Nino glared at Jun and kept on typing.
Nino: excuse me but
you are being incredibly rude
reading other ppl's private conversations
have you no manners?
stop reading this, right now
aren't you supposed to be paying attention to the lecture?
don't give me that look, i know this stuff like the back of my hand
rolling your eyes, eh? think u’re hot stuff
go sit with your fanclub then
oh ho! guess even you can see how creepy they are
what's with that frown?
Prissy mcpriss? you don't like it eh
PRISSY MCPRISS
PRISSSSYYYYYYY MCPRRRHDuewqqqqqqq
Sho: wtf
Nino is experiencing technical difficulties that are preventing his chats from being sent.
The second class ended, Nino grabbed his stuff and left. What Nino did not expect was for Matsumoto Jun to follow.
"Hey, you," he called. Nino ignored him.
"I'm talking to you! Hey!"
Nino whirled around. "Look," he said, as patiently as he could, "it was one thing to read my conversation with my friend, but was it really necessary for you to close my laptop?"
Jun crossed his arms. "It’s a laptop - you weren’t going to lose any information. And I had valid reason, you two were gossiping about me."
"Oh, I was not," Nino said. "How do you know I wasn't talking about the person sitting on my other side?"
"You called me Prissy McPriss!"
"So you automatically think I meant you, huh," Nino smirked.
"What's your name?" Jun asked abruptly.
"What's yours?" Nino retorted.
Jun gave a short laugh. "It's Matsumoto." He walked up to Nino and peered at him closely. Nino stamped down his reflex to turn away. "You look familiar," Jun said.
Shit, Nino thought. That wasn't good.
"I get that a lot," Nino lied smoothly. "I've got one of those really average faces, so my mom used to tell me."
"I see," Jun said, but he still looked skeptical.
Nino shifted his feet. Just say anything, he told himself. Anything to make him leave. Nino wanted this conversation to end. "I mean, Matsumoto-san must see so many people everyday, it's quite possible you've come across many people who look alike, right?"
"Why the politeness all of the sudden?" Jun laughed. "It was more interesting when you were being rude to me."
"What?" Nino said.
Jun glanced at his watch. "I have to go, but I apologize for that laptop thing. I know people talk about me, but you were being so obvious about it, it kind of pissed me off. Right, well. It was nice to meet you." He strode away, jacket flapping like a model's.
Nino belatedly realized that he just missed the perfect opportunity to ask Jun for Sho's interview. Alright. Something else that Sho could never find out.
Okay, so maybe Nino should have expected Jun to sort of recognize him. They'd crossed each other’s paths lots of times. In fact, way too many times for Nino's liking. Nino looked familiar because Nino liked to go to the scene of his crime to see how the events played out, which was where, inevitably, police and news reporters would show up. More often than not, Jun would show up too. Nino always stood near the back of the crowd, but he could tell when Jun arrived because the crowd would ripple and quiet to hear him speak. Jun would then find a slightly elevated place to stand on and make an elaborate speech talking about how much he regretted whatever incident it was, what he was planning to do to help, so on and so forth, blah blah blah. Nino hated that, how in less than five minutes, the little civil unrest he'd so painstakingly created got completely glossed over by Jun's promises of better days and sunny horizons. Nino stood near the back of the crowd and tried to assassinate Matsumoto Jun with his mind.
But Jun was never supposed to have noticed Nino; Nino had always assumed that Jun was the type who couldn’t see past the end of his own nose. But if Jun had noticed Nino at each of the settings - he might figure it out. That it was more than a coincidence that Nino was always there. Maybe Jun suspected. Maybe Jun knew. Why was he on campus? Dammit, Nino thought. This week was off to a terrible start.
Nino couldn’t find Aiba. He wasn't answering his texts so Nino called him. The line rang for a long time before Aiba finally answered with a hushed voice.
"Nino, you got me in trouble, we're not allowed cell phones in here."
"Where the hell are you?" Nino demanded. "I went to your lab building and got blocked by the campus security and there was a paramedic truck outside. What the fuck happened?"
"I'm okay," Aiba reassured him. "It wasn't me. I mean, it was me, but I'm fine. I just came to the clinic with Yuna-chan, that's where I am now, waiting outside her room, because I felt bad."
"What did you do?! If you tell me you spilt acid on yourself again, I swear I'll --"
"No, that wasn't it! I was mixing a solution in a flask and forgot to let out the gas. Yuna-chan leaned in to see what was the matter, because it was hissing, right? Then bang! The stopper shot up! Bang, right into her eye!"
"She wasn't wearing safety glasses?"
"She was, she was! But she was surprised, right? She tripped back into a bunch of other students and everyone fell down and crashed into each other and there were a ton of things broken."
Why wasn’t Nino surprised? "You realize this is all your fault, right?" he said, rubbing his face. "But you're okay?"
"I'm totally okay. But Yuna-chan cut up her hands a bit. And I feel guilty, so I'm here. As moral support."
Nino frowned. "And? How long are you planning to stay there?"
"Huh? Why? Oh. Um."
"It's almost five now," Nino said. "The laboratory materials room is locked after classes. You'll have to leave now if you're going to get there in time."
Aiba was silent.
"Aiba!" Nino cried. "The deuterium is only accessible today; they're going to use it all for that stupid research tomorrow! And then the school won't get anymore until it gets another grant or whatever! And who knows when that will be!"
"I know, I know! I'm sorry, Nino-chan," Aiba said. "But -- I caused a big mess today, so..." he trailed off.
Nino groaned. Why was he friends with such an idiot? He should've done everything himself, this morning. "Fine, fine. You stay there, I'll go get it."
"Great!" Aiba agreed quickly. "Come get me afterwards, okay? I have to go, the nurse is really glaring at me. Bye!"
Nino sighed.
His fingers were numb as Nino mechanically dialed out another number (he rarely, so rarely, got to use it, but he'd memorized it pretty much the second he'd gotten it). God, he thought. How did things turn out like this? What horrible timing. Why did that guy have to invite Nino over today of all days?
The line picked up. "Hello?"
"Hi Oh-chan," Nino murmured. This was one call that Nino never thought he'd be making in his life: bailing out on a da-- a meeting, a meeting -- with Ohno.
"Nino?" Ohno said softly. Nino tried not to melt.
"Hey, about going to your house today?" Nino asked.
"Oh, yeah. Do you want to meet now?"
"Oh-chan, I can't come today," Nino cringed. "I'm really sorry. Aiba did something really stupid, and I have to go make sure he's all right." There, that wasn't lying. "Maybe I can come by tomorrow instead?"
"Aiba-chan? Is he okay?"
"He's fine," Nino said regretfully.
"If Nino can't make it, it's okay," Ohno said. "It's not that important, I think."
"No, Oh-chan," Nino rushed. "I really wanted to go and see your art. Really. I love your art. And I want you to get a great mark for your project."
Ohno laughed. "Yeah, maybe next time then. ...but the project is due soon, so maybe I'll ask -- hm?" There was the distant overlap of voices, muffled through Ohno's hand covering the receiver. Nino waited.
"Nino?" Ohno said, after a moment. "Don't worry about me, Jun-kun just offered to help. I'll see you in class tomorrow. Take care of Aiba-chan! Bye bye."
Ohno hung up.
"What?" Nino said dully. Jun-kun? He couldn't possibly mean --
No. Freaking. Way.
Nino snuck into the lab materials room. Nino stole one thermos of deuterium. Nino doubled back on his way out and also took a small vial of hydrochloric acid. The next time he caught Jun's face on the television he was going to need something to throw.
part two
Thank you for reading! I will try to get the next part up by Tuesday, but I am not swearing with blood or anything, okay. It's up!