Quest 129
[Private//Hackable by Friends]
Well, this is just a fine mess, then, isn't it? Rue's confessed, Blue's angry, Caspian and Tony are likely annoyed with me, and everything's gone topsy-turvy, to say nothing of that curse on Thursday where we were all starting fires all over the place. And while it's tempting to say that Thursday's curse couldn't have been better if they'd planned it, I'm certainly not about to, since the likelihood that someone did is entirely too great.
I suppose it's true that I ought to have done something to prevent it. Perhaps I should've known better than to trust Rue when she approached me, or I should've known that something was wrong and done something about it, or I should've--I don't know what I should've done, really. If I did, perhaps then I would've done it, rather than having things turn out as they did. It's my fault Todd ended up the way he did, there's no denying that. He came out to look for me, and that's how he got caught.
But the alternative...the alternative would be to not trust my friends at all, and given the choice between the two, which is worse?
When we had that awful time with the prison last month, there came a moment when I had a choice to make, and I made it, and I'm still making my peace with it now but I made it and there's no taking it back. I did what the people I care about thought was right, and not necessarily what I thought was right, myself. And looking back on it, they were right to keep me home. As much as I may hate that I couldn't do more to help, it's likely I'm alive at all right now because I listened to them.
This time, I listened to what I thought was right. I can't turn my back on her, even after what she did. Not when I know why it happened. Not when I know how miserable she's been all this time. She's my friend, and she's been my friend almost since I arrived here, and in all that time, she's never hurt me. She knows me. Wasn't it silly, back last Christmas when I decided to tell my friends who I really was, and I was so nervous about confessing--and she'd already guessed all along? And how beautiful she looked on her wedding day, so happy and so bright...and how long it's been since I've seen her that way...
Should I give up on her after all that, when she made a mistake under the influence of a curse and her despair? Even if it was a mistake that cost me my heart, for a time?
Some things are more important, aren't they?
Or maybe I'm just an odd sort of girl who doesn't understand things as she ought to, as usual. But I suppose if someone needs to be an oddity around here, it might as well be me, since I have so much practice at it, already.
...Mm. Things really were much simpler in Daventry, weren't they?
[/Private]
Well, we're ten days into October, and already I'm finding myself growing sick of it. Though I suppose, on the other hand, today being the tenth means we're just about a third of the way done with October, and in five more days we'll be just about halfway. So it's all in how one looks at things, I suppose.
I wonder--has anyone noticed a theme to the curses this month, the way that animals seemed to be the theme of the last? We had one day of discussing the state of our lives, one day when I'm told people couldn't help but go around taking things from others, one day of tea parties, and now a day of starting fires. One that could be good or bad, then one bad. Another that could be good or bad, and then one bad. Or perhaps it's threes--two bad and one good?
Or perhaps it's two, and then a reward--one emotional, one physical, and one treat. Starting the fires did seem to be linked to emotions running high, didn't it? I wonder, then. If the next curse prompts us all to take action in a silly way, and then the one following it is something harmless, that might be the beginnings of a pattern. I suppose there's really not much point in tracking the curses, since I'm sure as soon as we hit upon a pattern, the deities will go and change things on us again, but it's something to do, anyway.
And speaking of things to do, does anyone have a good pumpkin pie recipe, by any chance? I suppose I could always go look one up in the Library, but it's always more fun to trade with someone else. Jack-o-lanterns and pumpkin pie and apples and cider and all the leaves turning colors in the trees...it's nice to stop and remember, every once in a while, that there are still some good things about October, despite all the dread that goes into it here in the City.
...I think I'm getting a bit homesick again.
Well, this is just a fine mess, then, isn't it? Rue's confessed, Blue's angry, Caspian and Tony are likely annoyed with me, and everything's gone topsy-turvy, to say nothing of that curse on Thursday where we were all starting fires all over the place. And while it's tempting to say that Thursday's curse couldn't have been better if they'd planned it, I'm certainly not about to, since the likelihood that someone did is entirely too great.
I suppose it's true that I ought to have done something to prevent it. Perhaps I should've known better than to trust Rue when she approached me, or I should've known that something was wrong and done something about it, or I should've--I don't know what I should've done, really. If I did, perhaps then I would've done it, rather than having things turn out as they did. It's my fault Todd ended up the way he did, there's no denying that. He came out to look for me, and that's how he got caught.
But the alternative...the alternative would be to not trust my friends at all, and given the choice between the two, which is worse?
When we had that awful time with the prison last month, there came a moment when I had a choice to make, and I made it, and I'm still making my peace with it now but I made it and there's no taking it back. I did what the people I care about thought was right, and not necessarily what I thought was right, myself. And looking back on it, they were right to keep me home. As much as I may hate that I couldn't do more to help, it's likely I'm alive at all right now because I listened to them.
This time, I listened to what I thought was right. I can't turn my back on her, even after what she did. Not when I know why it happened. Not when I know how miserable she's been all this time. She's my friend, and she's been my friend almost since I arrived here, and in all that time, she's never hurt me. She knows me. Wasn't it silly, back last Christmas when I decided to tell my friends who I really was, and I was so nervous about confessing--and she'd already guessed all along? And how beautiful she looked on her wedding day, so happy and so bright...and how long it's been since I've seen her that way...
Should I give up on her after all that, when she made a mistake under the influence of a curse and her despair? Even if it was a mistake that cost me my heart, for a time?
Some things are more important, aren't they?
Or maybe I'm just an odd sort of girl who doesn't understand things as she ought to, as usual. But I suppose if someone needs to be an oddity around here, it might as well be me, since I have so much practice at it, already.
...Mm. Things really were much simpler in Daventry, weren't they?
[/Private]
Well, we're ten days into October, and already I'm finding myself growing sick of it. Though I suppose, on the other hand, today being the tenth means we're just about a third of the way done with October, and in five more days we'll be just about halfway. So it's all in how one looks at things, I suppose.
I wonder--has anyone noticed a theme to the curses this month, the way that animals seemed to be the theme of the last? We had one day of discussing the state of our lives, one day when I'm told people couldn't help but go around taking things from others, one day of tea parties, and now a day of starting fires. One that could be good or bad, then one bad. Another that could be good or bad, and then one bad. Or perhaps it's threes--two bad and one good?
Or perhaps it's two, and then a reward--one emotional, one physical, and one treat. Starting the fires did seem to be linked to emotions running high, didn't it? I wonder, then. If the next curse prompts us all to take action in a silly way, and then the one following it is something harmless, that might be the beginnings of a pattern. I suppose there's really not much point in tracking the curses, since I'm sure as soon as we hit upon a pattern, the deities will go and change things on us again, but it's something to do, anyway.
And speaking of things to do, does anyone have a good pumpkin pie recipe, by any chance? I suppose I could always go look one up in the Library, but it's always more fun to trade with someone else. Jack-o-lanterns and pumpkin pie and apples and cider and all the leaves turning colors in the trees...it's nice to stop and remember, every once in a while, that there are still some good things about October, despite all the dread that goes into it here in the City.
...I think I'm getting a bit homesick again.