MY FANTASTICAL SUMMER!!!!!!!!!!!
Well thsi might be quite the long entry. On July 2nd I saw Cree again, and I met this one kid Alex. Now for the time being, he has been one of the most important things in my life. We were lovers of sorts, and in only three months of knwoing him, he is the only other person ( Besides Dana and Kaitlyn of course!) that I would fully die for. He's fucked me over and loved me throughout that.
The low down. I met him drunk at a grad party. Then I hung out with him about three days later. Then I had a friend birthday party at my house, then We made out for about half the night, then in my parents bedroom, I gave him head. It was amazing, the first action I've gotten in two years. THen he sucked Danny off, which made me mad for a little while. Then when we spooned at Cree's house on the fourth of july I realized that I can really like this kid. Then that friday, which was when I helped Dana Pack so she could move to her Dad's house, we had a talk, stating that our relationship would be a non monogimus one. Which I was okay with for a long time. Then I introduced his to Gary, I guy that I had jsut met really for the first time, about a month and ahalf before this, and then they started going out behind my back. For about two weeks I didn't know, then, when I visited Dana for the first time, since she had moved, I found out over the fucking internet, that they were. Now this was one of the most devastating things to happen to me so far. I was inevitably stuck on him that I couldn't think about him without making my stomach ache. Then, after about a month and a half they broke up ( as I had told Alex before, Gary has often gotten bored with people he's getting into). Alex called me crying on the phone, giving me all this bullshit. I didn't know what to think. I thought that this might be my one chance with Alex again, but he didn't want to date me? This blew my mind away. I have never hurt the kid at all, and I truly love him and no matter what he would do to me I would love him forever. But he wanted to sleep with other guys, getting back into his old lifestyle. I hated him for that. Taking my feeling out of everything, I wanted him to be happy with someone, even if that someone was not me.
I don't really think he knows how much I care for him. I don't know how to explain it but there is something that I completely adore and envy, inside of him and it makes me sick thinking about it. People keep on telling me that I need to get over him, he fucked up our friendship, but I can't becuase life right now without him, even if we're not together seems unimaginable. I need to apologize to everyone that I have bitched to about this, everyone that has truly listened to me. I love you all and you have no idea how much that helped me through this time. DANA, my love, my friend, you are the most important thing in my life, becuase I know I can come to you, no matter the time, no matter how busy you are, no matter what's going on in either of our lives, that you will always be there for me. As I am for you. Thanks.
The low down. I met him drunk at a grad party. Then I hung out with him about three days later. Then I had a friend birthday party at my house, then We made out for about half the night, then in my parents bedroom, I gave him head. It was amazing, the first action I've gotten in two years. THen he sucked Danny off, which made me mad for a little while. Then when we spooned at Cree's house on the fourth of july I realized that I can really like this kid. Then that friday, which was when I helped Dana Pack so she could move to her Dad's house, we had a talk, stating that our relationship would be a non monogimus one. Which I was okay with for a long time. Then I introduced his to Gary, I guy that I had jsut met really for the first time, about a month and ahalf before this, and then they started going out behind my back. For about two weeks I didn't know, then, when I visited Dana for the first time, since she had moved, I found out over the fucking internet, that they were. Now this was one of the most devastating things to happen to me so far. I was inevitably stuck on him that I couldn't think about him without making my stomach ache. Then, after about a month and a half they broke up ( as I had told Alex before, Gary has often gotten bored with people he's getting into). Alex called me crying on the phone, giving me all this bullshit. I didn't know what to think. I thought that this might be my one chance with Alex again, but he didn't want to date me? This blew my mind away. I have never hurt the kid at all, and I truly love him and no matter what he would do to me I would love him forever. But he wanted to sleep with other guys, getting back into his old lifestyle. I hated him for that. Taking my feeling out of everything, I wanted him to be happy with someone, even if that someone was not me.
I don't really think he knows how much I care for him. I don't know how to explain it but there is something that I completely adore and envy, inside of him and it makes me sick thinking about it. People keep on telling me that I need to get over him, he fucked up our friendship, but I can't becuase life right now without him, even if we're not together seems unimaginable. I need to apologize to everyone that I have bitched to about this, everyone that has truly listened to me. I love you all and you have no idea how much that helped me through this time. DANA, my love, my friend, you are the most important thing in my life, becuase I know I can come to you, no matter the time, no matter how busy you are, no matter what's going on in either of our lives, that you will always be there for me. As I am for you. Thanks.