well guys...
things have become normal, too normal.i need to shake things up. maybe i should go to a new school. or try something new. get new friends. i dunno. im thinking about it. its just too normal for me.
im starting to once again feel that lack of friends. i really need friends. but hel, who wants to be friends with a freak like me? i wouldnt.......ive made some new friends. like kelly. ive known her my whole life. and havnt really gotten to know her till now. she snice. i think ill enjoy being friends with her. but i cant just live with one friend. maybe i should start smoking pot. maybe then ill make more friends.....no, i shouldnt change my self to make friends. im really starting to get pathetic.
well...im starting to really hate myself again.
i hate that i cant make friends.
i mean what the hell is wrong with me?!
seriously...people comment and tell me ! what the fuck is wrong with me!!!!!!?????
urg!
too much self pitty. i really need to stop that. maybe that it. too much pitty.
urg i give up.....
* 6 months gone to waste.*
hey and heres a song ive had stuck in my head allll day.....so here it is....
*good bye to you.*
Of all the things i've believed in,
I just want to get it over with,
Tears form behind my eyes,
But i do not cry,
Counting the days that pass me by.
I've been searchin' deep down in my soul,
Words that i'm hearin' are starting to get old,
It feels like i'm starting all over again,
The last three years were just pretend,
And i say-
*goodbye to you,
Goodbye to everything i thought i knew,
You were the one i loved,
The one thing that i tried to hold on to.
I still get lost in your eyes,
And it seems that i can't live a day without you,
Closing my eyes,
And you chase my thoughts away,
To a place where i am blinded by the light,
But it's not right.
*goodbye to you,
Goodbye to everything i thought i knew,
You were the one i loved,
The one thing that i tried to hold on to.
Hold on to...
And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time,
I want what's yours and i want what's mine,
I want you,
And i'm not giving in this time.
*goodbye to you,
Goodbye to everything i thought i knew,
You were the one i loved,
The one thing that i tried to hold on to-
Goodbye to you,
Goodbye to everything i thought i knew,
You were the one i loved,
The one thing that i tried to hold on to.
Oh, oh woah,
And when the stars fall i will lie awake,
You're my shooting star.
ok now im surpreemly depressed. this is wonderful.
i just wanna go to sleep.
heres some pics....
