Comments | prettyasmurder: Hungry, anxious for pain+

prettyasmurder

Hungry, anxious for pain+

Aug 30, 2004 23:53

I started to update about my day but then deleted everything. I don't understand and definitely can't put to words what's going through my head. Pain in my pleasure when I feel like this, but all I can do is choke back some useless tears.

I want to tell you so bad that I feel like I'm losing you, but to something I can't quite put my finger on. I ( Read more... )

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mausoleum_door August 31 2004, 08:18:28 UTC

I hope you find what you're looking for. You know I'm always hear for you, but sometimes i think that's not exactly what you need. love.

prettyasmurder August 31 2004, 15:32:12 UTC

I don't know what I'm looking for, but at the same time.. don't we both know that we're looking for the same things? Through all those late-night half-drunk talks, we both know what we want out of life and what we still don't understand of the world. We both know that we don't belong here, with these people or especially a "9 to 5" job. We're just not like that.
I just want to be happy, and I want you to be happy, too.

Love you.

_tumor September 1 2004, 05:34:44 UTC

howabout a midnight to 8 job.

as soon as you graduate.

GOD FUCKING DAMNIT

prettyasmurder September 1 2004, 07:25:10 UTC

Haha, aw, yeah.. you're amazing for that.

mausoleum_door September 1 2004, 08:01:55 UTC

amandala, we will always be searching for meaning in our lives, thats what makes them not so useless. I don't think we'll ever fill the holes in us, but if we keep growing and changing it will get better. I think after we get out of here, stupid little things won't bother us anymore. I really hope we can go to college in the same area, cause I want to grow up with you. You will always remind me of the things I want to get out of life, and that there is always hope and a way to get better things for ourselves. I really want to travel with you too, see and experience new things. I think we both need it. I know that school will settle us back in to the usual patterns of our lives, but i hope we don't lose ourselves in it. i dont want our thoughts to just slip away. I know I'm going away this weekend, but I'm hoping i can clear my head of things so i can talk about this better.

amanda, because you understand me. love

_tumor September 2 2004, 05:29:46 UTC

gahhh I fucking hate it..

im trying to get them to move me to first shift...

which still isn't 9-5.

its 8-4, nizznach

_tumor September 2 2004, 05:30:05 UTC

god damn my sucking at life, I meant bizznach

prettyasmurder September 4 2004, 08:42:19 UTC

It's okay, you don't suck all that much.

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