fanfiction, Jared/Jensen, Insanity or Reality?
Disclaimer: I do not own either Jensen Ackles or Jared Padelecki, nor do I own any rights to anything related to ‘Supernatural’.
Author:
prettiful_pout
Genre: Horror, Angst, Romance
Status: Complete
Word Count: 2000ish.
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Jensen’s spent just a little to long in the shoes of Dean and needs Jared to reassure him on reality.
A/N: Okay so I’ve had this idea for quite some time and decided to risk it. I don’t know if you’ll all like this but please be kind and if horror makes you squeamish along with homosexual pairings, please turn away now.
Insanity or Reality?
It’s always the same. He comes home late, wakes up early, maybe if you’re lucky you get a note left on your pillow. It’s not enough. Your hand grazes the handle of the gun, your fingers toying with the barrel. ‘Never enough…’ He’s sleeping right now, his face peaceful; innocent. A soft chuckle rises within your chest as you realize what a liar life can make a person. Reality steals a person’s innocence and you know it better than anyone.
The blankets fall back from his perfectly shaped chest, the skin toned and beautiful in all it’s wonderful glory. Your hands shake but you don’t dare to put the metal weapon down. Why would you? What exactly do you have to lose? He’s your brother, your best friend, and your lover. There’s something wrong there and your mind fights to realize it before you clue in. You’re in love with your little brother, your sibling, the boy you taught to pee in a bush and put bags of flaming dog shit on crude neighbours doorsteps with. Is that wrong? No. Yes? Yes… It is… Really? Hmm, not to sure about it but you shake the thought from your head. You’re Dean. You are Dean right? Your emerald green eyes flicker down over your naked expanse of flesh and a fanatical grin crosses your face. Yup, you’re definitely Dean Winchester.
The guilt grips your heart and you move back a step, clutching your chest and panting heavily. The voices in your head grow louder and you clench your eyes tightly shut to block them out. Your hands fist in your hair and a angry hiss escapes your lush lips, “Shut up! Shut up shut up shut up! You’re gonna wake him up if you don’t just shut up!” Your fist collides with your jaw and the sickening crunch of bone brings your painful attention back to your task at hand.
“Dean… What are you.. Why do you have a gun? Dean? Put the gun down and get into bed.” Sam’s voice moves you to his side and you’re instantly soothing him, your hands running up and down the sides of his face; completely ignorant of the fearful glances cast from beautiful brown eyes at the blood dripping from your mouth.
“Shhhh Sammy, it’ll all be over soon. This won’t hurt a bit. I promise you. I’m your big brother and you need to do what I say, alright?” Your face twists from a harebrained smile to an angry mold of rage and frustration and you beat at your skull, the butt of the gun hammering your tender head. “Shut up! I thought I told you to just BE QUIET!”
“Dean! Stop it!” Sam’s hand’s reach out and yank at your gun but you can’t allow that now can you? You hiss at him and back hand him. Sometime during your relationship with your little brother you know your mind began to leave you and your strength grew lunatically greater. It’s not a surprise to you when he tumbles off the bed, his hand holding his cheek and his eyes bright and big and just to damn adorable as they plead with you for an answer.
You shake your head, a sad expression on your face. “I’m sorry Sammy but you can’t be with me and I can’t be with you and we can’t be with eachother and and and people don’t work and we need to take a little itty bitty time apart, m’kay? You’re such a sweet, good little boy. You are a good boy Sammy and oyu know that don’t you? Yes you do. Now hold still, I don’t want to miss, we can’t have that now can we?”
Sam shakes his head in bewilderment. “De-Dean, what the hell? Come on man, you’re not making sense.” Tears stream down his face and you tilt your head in confusion, not understanding why he’d be crying when he knows that this was coming. Everything lead up to this. They were walking sins and they couldn’t go around spreading it could they? Sin was bad and they needed to eliminate the source of it. “Dean! Fuck! Stop it! Please! Why?”
You sigh, completely exhasperated. Why doesn’t he just understand? “We’re walking sins Sammy. We’re not meant for this world where there’s rules and restrictions. You don’t like it here with me either Sammy, or else you wouldn’t leave me alone all day and all night. You fuck me and then leave me. Day in day out day in day out day in day out, and so on and so on. You get it?”
Sam’s shaking his head furiously and you smile at him because he hasn’t made to run away, to move or to scream. “I love you Sammy.” The words are whispered prayers off your lips as you pull the trigger, the bullet moving in slow motion before your fascinated eyes. And then your little Sammy is no more. He’s gone and a sharp prickling feels behind your eyelids. You touch your eyes and are confused at the moisture you find on them.
You stroll casually over to Sam’s bleeding corpse, leaning down to poke at the gore covered brain matter spattered against the wall. Your interest is soon lost and you run your fingertips down the side of Sam’s face, smiling almost peacefully at the smoothness of the tan cheek. You lay down and hug his body close to yours, pulling his heavy form tightly against yours before putting the gun to your temple. “I’m coming Sammy, don’t worry.” The metal glints in the flickering moonlight and then the scream of the bullet slicing through the air ruins the perfect silence.
“Jen! Jen! Baby please! Come on! Stop it! You’re scaring me! Jensen Ross Ackles! Don’t make me kick your short ass!”
A groan escapes past your lips and your green eyes flicker open, your hands instantly coming to the sides of your head and massaging the throbbing area. “Jay? What’s wrong?” You bolt up in bed, a scream tearing from your throat as your memories of Jared -Sam?- laying before you, blood oozing from his head. Jared’s hugging you, rocking you back and forth but you can’t stop, can’t stop the fear and pain and anger and just down right horror from flowing through your head.
Something presses to your lips, muffling your screams and you soon realize that the soft object is Jared’s lips. Your breath leaves you and you soon find yourself on your back, Jared’s hands cradling your head delicately. Your screams have stopped but your body still continues to tremble. Jared wraps his massive arms around you and he’s cooing softly, gently, into your ear. Your breath returns and soon the both of you are merely rocking in eachother’s arms.
Jared presses a kiss to your forehead. “What’s wrong baby? What was your nightmare about?”
You look up at him with wide, teary eyes. “How’d you know?”
“How’d I know about your nightmare? Jesus Jen, you were screaming the whole damn set down. Eric and Jeff have already been here trying to calm you down. We couldn’t wake you up and-fuck, it was down right scary man. What happened?” Jared swipes at a cascading bead of sweat and you nuzzle into the touch.
“It was horrible. I was Dean and you were Sam and, god. It was like, I- Dean-, he’d lost his mind. He wasn’t making sense and then he-he shot you and god, it was the most terrible thing. I just-I-” You break off, sobs catching in your chest, and you cling to Jared’s naked chest, drawing off of his strength. His hands are running up and down your back, calming you and you stop your flow of tears.
“You won’t die on me, will you?”
“Never.” The look in his eyes as he stares at you has your breath hitching.
“I-I believe you. Please, show me you’re real and not really-really dead.” You choke on the words but Jared’s kissing you softly, stealing your fears and as his hands roam your naked body, you melt to a puddle of lusty mush.
Jared plants little feathery kisses all over your face and a hand reaches down between your legs, spreading your thighs as if it were the easiest thing he’d ever done; which it probably was because you’re completely willing in this. “I’m real,” He whispers, kissing your brow and grabbing for the small tube on his nightstand and popping the top before pouring a heavy amount of the cool liquid into the palm of his hand. The lube gets tossed to another side of the bed and you gasp as cool fingers massage your entrance. Usually you’d be ordering for Jared to just get on with it, screw you right into the mattress, but right now you need him to take complete control of you, prove to you that this is real and a dream is just that; a dream.
A finger enters you and the burn of stretching fingers has you squirming beneath Jared, wanting him to just get on with it but remaining patient as another finger slides slowly into you, the pair of them scissoring and stretching you. Your hands twitch and ache to grab Jared’s hands, jerk them from your body and just demand that he take you, but you wait. A whine catches in your throat and your eyes open to be captivated by brown eyes boring into you. Stealing a kiss as he positions himself above you, he whispers into your ear, his breath hot and too sexy for his own damn good, “I’m for real baby,” He take you in one swift movement and you squeak slightly as your body is jerked upwards with the force of it. Jared usually isn’t a rough lover but you understand his need to make you realize that he’s actually there. “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere. Don’t,” He breaks off, nipping at the hallow of your neck and picking up his pace, your body jolting up in the large bed with each thrust, “Don’t ever forget that.”
He’s finished talking and you scrape your nails down his back as his lips kiss your jaw line. “Jesus,” He breathes, gasping and jerking his hips up even harder into you. It burns but you don’t protest. This isn’t about the pleasure to be found in sex, but about feeling and knowing that you have eachother. It seems to go on forever and you know for a fact that he’s purposely missing your prostate, not giving you pleasure until you admit that you know it’s Jared above you and nothing else. Clenching your eyes tight at a particularly hard thrust, you whisper through shaky lips, “Jared.”
That simple whisper seems to be all he needed because his rapid thrusts have slowed and now its no longer a challenge of bringing you to reality or simple sex but love. He massages your prostate, rolling his hips around in a circle before thrusting up gently inside you, his hand gripping your swollen member and rubbing the pad of his thumb over the rosy tip. You whimper and when he scrapes a finger nail over your slit, you become completely undone, impaling yourself upon him before cumming in long, hot spurts all over both yours and his chest. Jared’s jaw locks at the clench of muscles around his cock and with a few last thrusts, he’s grunting and coming long and hard inside of you.
Jared collapses in a sweaty heap on you, your chests sticking to eachother, sweat and cum mixing into a musky type of bodily glue and soon you’re both laughing. Laughing so hard your sides ache and your heads become dizzy. You stay that way for what seems forever, joined both physically and emotionally. Finally, the laughter dies down and Jared pulls out of you, wiping you off with the bed sheet and wrapping a protective arm around your waist, pulling you snug up against his solid form and laying your head down on his chest.
Jared’s fingers run tenderly through your hair and you close your eyes before jerking them open, fearful of the dreams that may overcome you once again. You whimper and jerk at the feeling of a fingertip beneath your chin, tilting up your head. Jared’s lips are soft and gentle on yours and as he pulls away, your eyes lock. He nods and you let out a shaky sigh. He’s reassuring you that it’s alright to sleep; to dream. Timidly your eyes shut and you only just realize how tired you really are. You’re still scared of your nightmares but Jared’s promised you dreams and he’s never let you down before. He’s real and he’s always there for you. You drift off into a peaceful sleep with thoughts of Jared your comfort as his arms stay locked around you in a safeguard from danger.
The End
Author:
prettiful_pout
Genre: Horror, Angst, Romance
Status: Complete
Word Count: 2000ish.
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Jensen’s spent just a little to long in the shoes of Dean and needs Jared to reassure him on reality.
A/N: Okay so I’ve had this idea for quite some time and decided to risk it. I don’t know if you’ll all like this but please be kind and if horror makes you squeamish along with homosexual pairings, please turn away now.
Insanity or Reality?
It’s always the same. He comes home late, wakes up early, maybe if you’re lucky you get a note left on your pillow. It’s not enough. Your hand grazes the handle of the gun, your fingers toying with the barrel. ‘Never enough…’ He’s sleeping right now, his face peaceful; innocent. A soft chuckle rises within your chest as you realize what a liar life can make a person. Reality steals a person’s innocence and you know it better than anyone.
The blankets fall back from his perfectly shaped chest, the skin toned and beautiful in all it’s wonderful glory. Your hands shake but you don’t dare to put the metal weapon down. Why would you? What exactly do you have to lose? He’s your brother, your best friend, and your lover. There’s something wrong there and your mind fights to realize it before you clue in. You’re in love with your little brother, your sibling, the boy you taught to pee in a bush and put bags of flaming dog shit on crude neighbours doorsteps with. Is that wrong? No. Yes? Yes… It is… Really? Hmm, not to sure about it but you shake the thought from your head. You’re Dean. You are Dean right? Your emerald green eyes flicker down over your naked expanse of flesh and a fanatical grin crosses your face. Yup, you’re definitely Dean Winchester.
The guilt grips your heart and you move back a step, clutching your chest and panting heavily. The voices in your head grow louder and you clench your eyes tightly shut to block them out. Your hands fist in your hair and a angry hiss escapes your lush lips, “Shut up! Shut up shut up shut up! You’re gonna wake him up if you don’t just shut up!” Your fist collides with your jaw and the sickening crunch of bone brings your painful attention back to your task at hand.
“Dean… What are you.. Why do you have a gun? Dean? Put the gun down and get into bed.” Sam’s voice moves you to his side and you’re instantly soothing him, your hands running up and down the sides of his face; completely ignorant of the fearful glances cast from beautiful brown eyes at the blood dripping from your mouth.
“Shhhh Sammy, it’ll all be over soon. This won’t hurt a bit. I promise you. I’m your big brother and you need to do what I say, alright?” Your face twists from a harebrained smile to an angry mold of rage and frustration and you beat at your skull, the butt of the gun hammering your tender head. “Shut up! I thought I told you to just BE QUIET!”
“Dean! Stop it!” Sam’s hand’s reach out and yank at your gun but you can’t allow that now can you? You hiss at him and back hand him. Sometime during your relationship with your little brother you know your mind began to leave you and your strength grew lunatically greater. It’s not a surprise to you when he tumbles off the bed, his hand holding his cheek and his eyes bright and big and just to damn adorable as they plead with you for an answer.
You shake your head, a sad expression on your face. “I’m sorry Sammy but you can’t be with me and I can’t be with you and we can’t be with eachother and and and people don’t work and we need to take a little itty bitty time apart, m’kay? You’re such a sweet, good little boy. You are a good boy Sammy and oyu know that don’t you? Yes you do. Now hold still, I don’t want to miss, we can’t have that now can we?”
Sam shakes his head in bewilderment. “De-Dean, what the hell? Come on man, you’re not making sense.” Tears stream down his face and you tilt your head in confusion, not understanding why he’d be crying when he knows that this was coming. Everything lead up to this. They were walking sins and they couldn’t go around spreading it could they? Sin was bad and they needed to eliminate the source of it. “Dean! Fuck! Stop it! Please! Why?”
You sigh, completely exhasperated. Why doesn’t he just understand? “We’re walking sins Sammy. We’re not meant for this world where there’s rules and restrictions. You don’t like it here with me either Sammy, or else you wouldn’t leave me alone all day and all night. You fuck me and then leave me. Day in day out day in day out day in day out, and so on and so on. You get it?”
Sam’s shaking his head furiously and you smile at him because he hasn’t made to run away, to move or to scream. “I love you Sammy.” The words are whispered prayers off your lips as you pull the trigger, the bullet moving in slow motion before your fascinated eyes. And then your little Sammy is no more. He’s gone and a sharp prickling feels behind your eyelids. You touch your eyes and are confused at the moisture you find on them.
You stroll casually over to Sam’s bleeding corpse, leaning down to poke at the gore covered brain matter spattered against the wall. Your interest is soon lost and you run your fingertips down the side of Sam’s face, smiling almost peacefully at the smoothness of the tan cheek. You lay down and hug his body close to yours, pulling his heavy form tightly against yours before putting the gun to your temple. “I’m coming Sammy, don’t worry.” The metal glints in the flickering moonlight and then the scream of the bullet slicing through the air ruins the perfect silence.
“Jen! Jen! Baby please! Come on! Stop it! You’re scaring me! Jensen Ross Ackles! Don’t make me kick your short ass!”
A groan escapes past your lips and your green eyes flicker open, your hands instantly coming to the sides of your head and massaging the throbbing area. “Jay? What’s wrong?” You bolt up in bed, a scream tearing from your throat as your memories of Jared -Sam?- laying before you, blood oozing from his head. Jared’s hugging you, rocking you back and forth but you can’t stop, can’t stop the fear and pain and anger and just down right horror from flowing through your head.
Something presses to your lips, muffling your screams and you soon realize that the soft object is Jared’s lips. Your breath leaves you and you soon find yourself on your back, Jared’s hands cradling your head delicately. Your screams have stopped but your body still continues to tremble. Jared wraps his massive arms around you and he’s cooing softly, gently, into your ear. Your breath returns and soon the both of you are merely rocking in eachother’s arms.
Jared presses a kiss to your forehead. “What’s wrong baby? What was your nightmare about?”
You look up at him with wide, teary eyes. “How’d you know?”
“How’d I know about your nightmare? Jesus Jen, you were screaming the whole damn set down. Eric and Jeff have already been here trying to calm you down. We couldn’t wake you up and-fuck, it was down right scary man. What happened?” Jared swipes at a cascading bead of sweat and you nuzzle into the touch.
“It was horrible. I was Dean and you were Sam and, god. It was like, I- Dean-, he’d lost his mind. He wasn’t making sense and then he-he shot you and god, it was the most terrible thing. I just-I-” You break off, sobs catching in your chest, and you cling to Jared’s naked chest, drawing off of his strength. His hands are running up and down your back, calming you and you stop your flow of tears.
“You won’t die on me, will you?”
“Never.” The look in his eyes as he stares at you has your breath hitching.
“I-I believe you. Please, show me you’re real and not really-really dead.” You choke on the words but Jared’s kissing you softly, stealing your fears and as his hands roam your naked body, you melt to a puddle of lusty mush.
Jared plants little feathery kisses all over your face and a hand reaches down between your legs, spreading your thighs as if it were the easiest thing he’d ever done; which it probably was because you’re completely willing in this. “I’m real,” He whispers, kissing your brow and grabbing for the small tube on his nightstand and popping the top before pouring a heavy amount of the cool liquid into the palm of his hand. The lube gets tossed to another side of the bed and you gasp as cool fingers massage your entrance. Usually you’d be ordering for Jared to just get on with it, screw you right into the mattress, but right now you need him to take complete control of you, prove to you that this is real and a dream is just that; a dream.
A finger enters you and the burn of stretching fingers has you squirming beneath Jared, wanting him to just get on with it but remaining patient as another finger slides slowly into you, the pair of them scissoring and stretching you. Your hands twitch and ache to grab Jared’s hands, jerk them from your body and just demand that he take you, but you wait. A whine catches in your throat and your eyes open to be captivated by brown eyes boring into you. Stealing a kiss as he positions himself above you, he whispers into your ear, his breath hot and too sexy for his own damn good, “I’m for real baby,” He take you in one swift movement and you squeak slightly as your body is jerked upwards with the force of it. Jared usually isn’t a rough lover but you understand his need to make you realize that he’s actually there. “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere. Don’t,” He breaks off, nipping at the hallow of your neck and picking up his pace, your body jolting up in the large bed with each thrust, “Don’t ever forget that.”
He’s finished talking and you scrape your nails down his back as his lips kiss your jaw line. “Jesus,” He breathes, gasping and jerking his hips up even harder into you. It burns but you don’t protest. This isn’t about the pleasure to be found in sex, but about feeling and knowing that you have eachother. It seems to go on forever and you know for a fact that he’s purposely missing your prostate, not giving you pleasure until you admit that you know it’s Jared above you and nothing else. Clenching your eyes tight at a particularly hard thrust, you whisper through shaky lips, “Jared.”
That simple whisper seems to be all he needed because his rapid thrusts have slowed and now its no longer a challenge of bringing you to reality or simple sex but love. He massages your prostate, rolling his hips around in a circle before thrusting up gently inside you, his hand gripping your swollen member and rubbing the pad of his thumb over the rosy tip. You whimper and when he scrapes a finger nail over your slit, you become completely undone, impaling yourself upon him before cumming in long, hot spurts all over both yours and his chest. Jared’s jaw locks at the clench of muscles around his cock and with a few last thrusts, he’s grunting and coming long and hard inside of you.
Jared collapses in a sweaty heap on you, your chests sticking to eachother, sweat and cum mixing into a musky type of bodily glue and soon you’re both laughing. Laughing so hard your sides ache and your heads become dizzy. You stay that way for what seems forever, joined both physically and emotionally. Finally, the laughter dies down and Jared pulls out of you, wiping you off with the bed sheet and wrapping a protective arm around your waist, pulling you snug up against his solid form and laying your head down on his chest.
Jared’s fingers run tenderly through your hair and you close your eyes before jerking them open, fearful of the dreams that may overcome you once again. You whimper and jerk at the feeling of a fingertip beneath your chin, tilting up your head. Jared’s lips are soft and gentle on yours and as he pulls away, your eyes lock. He nods and you let out a shaky sigh. He’s reassuring you that it’s alright to sleep; to dream. Timidly your eyes shut and you only just realize how tired you really are. You’re still scared of your nightmares but Jared’s promised you dreams and he’s never let you down before. He’s real and he’s always there for you. You drift off into a peaceful sleep with thoughts of Jared your comfort as his arms stay locked around you in a safeguard from danger.
The End