(no subject)
i leave for hawaii tomorrow. i'll be gone 8 days, saturday the 19th to saturday the 26th. this is where i'm staying. i have my own cabin and everything.
i haven't been to hawaii since i was like, 8 years old or something. all i remember is humidity, palm trees, huge bugs, and t-shirt stands everywhere. this time around, i hope to experience the more natural aspect(s) of the island.
most people get super excited before flying somewhere as scenic as hawaii. i remember how excited i used to get as a child. i wish i could be excited too.
the most annoying part of having a fear of flying on airplanes is that the anxiety doesn't let up for like 48 hours. i'm anxious the day before, i'm anxious the night before, i'm super anxious on the drive to the airport, and i have to be severely medicated to keep from having an anxiety attack during take off. that anxiety sticks around, though dulled, for the entire damn flight, and doesn't abate until the plane stops moving. it's an incredibly exhausting ordeal.
the best i can do, besides medication, is keep reminding myself that life's a crapshoot, no matter what you do. i can't not go, so there's no sense obsessing over how much i don't want to go. i just have to get through today and tomorrow, and then i'll be there, and it'll be fine until i have to fly home; and at least then, i have coming home to look forward to!
today i'm working, but i won't get much done - too distracted. instead i'm going to putter about and pack and whatnot.
love kittie
i haven't been to hawaii since i was like, 8 years old or something. all i remember is humidity, palm trees, huge bugs, and t-shirt stands everywhere. this time around, i hope to experience the more natural aspect(s) of the island.
most people get super excited before flying somewhere as scenic as hawaii. i remember how excited i used to get as a child. i wish i could be excited too.
the most annoying part of having a fear of flying on airplanes is that the anxiety doesn't let up for like 48 hours. i'm anxious the day before, i'm anxious the night before, i'm super anxious on the drive to the airport, and i have to be severely medicated to keep from having an anxiety attack during take off. that anxiety sticks around, though dulled, for the entire damn flight, and doesn't abate until the plane stops moving. it's an incredibly exhausting ordeal.
the best i can do, besides medication, is keep reminding myself that life's a crapshoot, no matter what you do. i can't not go, so there's no sense obsessing over how much i don't want to go. i just have to get through today and tomorrow, and then i'll be there, and it'll be fine until i have to fly home; and at least then, i have coming home to look forward to!
today i'm working, but i won't get much done - too distracted. instead i'm going to putter about and pack and whatnot.
love kittie