Reality
Okay, so now that I've had a few days to absorb the fact that I got hired into my starting dream job, I've had proper time to reflect. And this is what I've come to terms with:
I am terrified.
This realization just hit me yesterday when I recieved my employee package from the Puralotor man and was signing my contract, filling out various government forms, and choosing my benefits package. It bascially solidified that I actually got this job -- and on my own no less, without any connections (how the hell I pulled that one, I have no idea). I put myself through 2 years of academic hell and have been rejected job after job for the last year and a half. This is what I've strived for, this is where my journey was suppose to take me and now that it's here, all I can think about is how terrifying it is. This is territory that I haven't crossed yet and I feel like I'm going through a military base with stragetically placed mines...one wrong step and the whole thing will blow up in my face.
But at the same time, this fear is exciting. It's exciting because this new territory will test my abilities, test my limits, and see how far I can actually travel through it without killing myself. Ahh. Bittersweet, isn't it?
The office is beautiful. I've been in plenty of office spaces this past year and I have to say that this is probably one of the prettiest offices I have been in. Newly renovated office with sharp black-brown furniture...very corporate yet it's inviting (probably because there's a massive beach display with sand, shells, a beach chair with a bright green cocktail just as you walk in, how can that be scary?)
;_; I'm an adult now. Boo.
I am terrified.
This realization just hit me yesterday when I recieved my employee package from the Puralotor man and was signing my contract, filling out various government forms, and choosing my benefits package. It bascially solidified that I actually got this job -- and on my own no less, without any connections (how the hell I pulled that one, I have no idea). I put myself through 2 years of academic hell and have been rejected job after job for the last year and a half. This is what I've strived for, this is where my journey was suppose to take me and now that it's here, all I can think about is how terrifying it is. This is territory that I haven't crossed yet and I feel like I'm going through a military base with stragetically placed mines...one wrong step and the whole thing will blow up in my face.
But at the same time, this fear is exciting. It's exciting because this new territory will test my abilities, test my limits, and see how far I can actually travel through it without killing myself. Ahh. Bittersweet, isn't it?
The office is beautiful. I've been in plenty of office spaces this past year and I have to say that this is probably one of the prettiest offices I have been in. Newly renovated office with sharp black-brown furniture...very corporate yet it's inviting (probably because there's a massive beach display with sand, shells, a beach chair with a bright green cocktail just as you walk in, how can that be scary?)
;_; I'm an adult now. Boo.