Fandomverse Challenge: Five Reasons To Love Abed

[preosmo]

 

Five Reasons To Love Abed

1. He's a clever motherfucker. He's hyper smart and observes the world as a totally objective third party. He's both baffled by his fellow humans and understands them on such a profound level he surpasses the great psychiatrists. He's figured out people so well that he can have their side of the conversation for them. And he uses it. Despite Britta's insistence that he's their innocent, he's not. He knows how to manipulate anybody but he doesn't do it unless he needs to. Because he's that awesome.  Despite the negative connotations the idea of manipulation takes, whenever he does it you have to sit back in awe at the effective, dirty, dastardly sneakiness of it. 
2. His love of movies and TV shows. Have you SEEN his dorm room? He's got movie posters and memorabilia (and a boa). He knows pretty much every single movie out there and he uses them to understand those around him. And TV SHOWS! A man after my own heart. Anybody who loves movies and shows that much is in no way a bad character. While some may feel his smarts could be used elsewhere, I feel they are in the perfect place. After all, he'll be a great film maker one day. At least he'll be one of those niche 'what the fuck did I just watch' directors that draws an intensely loyal cult following. Just look at his movie ABED! Even though it sucked he still had everyone chomping at the bit to be a part of it.  
3. He keeps a notebook of all his friends. He has Annie, Britta, and Shirley's menstrual cycles mapped out to a T (and gives them chocolates during this time. How sweet is that?) He has all their weaknesses, likes and dislikes, and what they need in an infograph. He literally takes notes on life. I wonder what else he has in there. I mean, he's only got a few pages on his friends. What does he say about Chang or Duncan? What does he say about the WORLD? I'm dying, and a little frightened, to find out. Possibly he has figured out the meaning to life (and it isn't 42). 
4. Unf. His hands, just look at them. Long, strong fingers like that, you know he's got to put some artistic use to them. The way he gestures with his hands, so graceful and hypnotic. His fingers move almost as if by independent thought. Look at his nose, the way it wrinkles up when he laughs. He's got 'weird shoulders' and scrawny calves and oversized irises. You see this and all you want to do is hug him. He's got a surprisingly defined pack of abs and wears tighty whities. You saw that jawline and just wanted to touch it. And when he impersonates John Draper you go slightly weak in the knees. Admit it.
5. All in all, Abed's a sweet guy. He truly loves Troy and says so in the zombie episode where he's sacrificing his life so Troy can save everyone. He helped Annie with her hellish experiment with the Duncan Principal, sitting through it just because Annie is his friend. He agreed to hit on a girl just to please his friends who were worried about him. He's always there when they need him, and even when they don't. He lets Jeff bunk with him, apologizes to Shirley and saves Pierce and Jeff from a chair avalanche. He does this not just because he wants them to like them, but because he really, honestly cares.