(no subject)
'm scheduled to be induced next Friday, January 14th at 9:00pm and I am freaking out! I'll be 39w1d when I'm induced. My dr. wants to induce because I have gestational diabetes. I've heard so many stories about how it hurts more because your body isn't ready and it often leads to an emergency c-section.
I'm on the fence about whether it's really necessary though. The doctor said I definitely will not be having a huge baby. At my u/s on Dec. 15 she was measuring 4 lbs. 9 oz and she has been measuring 2 weeks small on the ultrasound the entire pregnancy. At my appointment on Thursday he said my belly is measuring 36 weeks at 38. Why he still wants to induce is beyond me. One part of me wants to say I want to wait til I go naturally. If that's not til 42 weeks though, it scares me. What if the ultrasound measurement is off? And to be honest, I haven't controlled my "diabetes" like I should've this last month. I've been a lot more lax on what I've been eating and my numbers have been awesome. I even bought a new pack of strips and a new monitor to make sure I was getting accurate results. Honestly I think I just happened to take the glucose test at the wrong time when I was horribly sick. I could barely get out of bed for a week and still had to drag myself to work because no one would cover for me and I pretty much had no choice. I work 10-11 hour days as a fast food manager and it pretty much killed me. I've heard that illness and stress causes elevated blood sugar.
Anyway... if I wait til I go into labor naturally, I'm worried my baby will be too big nonetheless. I'm worried about being induced because of all the complications that can arise. I'm worried that my baby will be small and have a bunch of problems, even though every ultrasound and every NST has been fine. I'm worried about how my "lady parts" will be affected after giving birth. I'm worried about whether I'll be a good mother. I feel horrible for saying this but I found myself thinking I wish I could undo getting pregnant to eliminate all the stress! I've been so excited up until this point. My stomach has been in knots and I really have no one to talk to except my SO and he really doesn't know anything about childbirth. Ugh. Anyway... thanks for listening to me. I'm so thankful for this community.