(no subject)
Ive been so confused and upset lately. I mean. I have Keenan back around, all my friends are back in my life, i have fun everyday, i have alot. But i just feel so danm upset. There is no doubt that it is about my weight issues. As many people who tell me 'im not fat', it still doesnt cancel out what all the other people say i am and what the scale is telling me. Ive always been edgy with my weight, back even when i was about 115llbs, only 6 months ago. I would really like to blame it on the birth control, but i really dont know if thats it. Ive always been up and about, and ive always eaten fine. But its all the sudden making me burst. Yes, ive been at one continuous weight for the summer, but that number has been bothering me the entire time. The thing that hurts the most is not being able to wear some of my old stuff, or share clothes with people i use to be just like. I feel like there is something growing fucking inside me. Why cant i just be frail. Why. Id do anything if id know id be back to okay.