(no subject)
Man I hate being confused and lost. I feel so crazy! I've not talked to Jay for a couple days now. Sometimes I get these vibes that he is annoyed with me and sometimes I get vibes that he really digs me. I don't know what he is really feeling like, and I don't want to look like a fool so I stopped talking to him. And I have kinda lost interest. Sure, if he was interested I would pursue him. But I just can't tell with this shy boy...so I am done. I don't want to put the effort into it. He needs to make all the effort.
And Dan is the main cause of my confusion. I really need to listen to everyone else that says I need to stop talking to him completely. It would really help, I know! But it is so hard. But everything he says either annoys me, confuses me, makes me upset, or makes me really hopeful. It's such a roller coaster with him and I don't need to be on this ride!
So I have been hanging out with Amanda a lot. She is going through some tough shit right now and I am just glad I can be there for her. She doesn't want to talk to any of her other friends, so I feel kinda special. The other night I made plans with Jay, and she called right as I was leaving because she needed to talk. So I cancelled with Jay (and I thought he was annoyed)...and me and her went to Saylorville and walked in the water. It was really nice and good for her. Tonight we are doing the same, but this time we are bringing swimsuits and swimming. Way fun!
I cleaned 2 tanks yesterday. I need to clean the other 2 but I don't want to. I'll put it off until tomorrow. I should apply for jobs or something today.
I had an eye doctor appointment today. Just a yearly checkup. My right eye changed just a smidge...my left eye not at all. Ok...later...
And Dan is the main cause of my confusion. I really need to listen to everyone else that says I need to stop talking to him completely. It would really help, I know! But it is so hard. But everything he says either annoys me, confuses me, makes me upset, or makes me really hopeful. It's such a roller coaster with him and I don't need to be on this ride!
So I have been hanging out with Amanda a lot. She is going through some tough shit right now and I am just glad I can be there for her. She doesn't want to talk to any of her other friends, so I feel kinda special. The other night I made plans with Jay, and she called right as I was leaving because she needed to talk. So I cancelled with Jay (and I thought he was annoyed)...and me and her went to Saylorville and walked in the water. It was really nice and good for her. Tonight we are doing the same, but this time we are bringing swimsuits and swimming. Way fun!
I cleaned 2 tanks yesterday. I need to clean the other 2 but I don't want to. I'll put it off until tomorrow. I should apply for jobs or something today.
I had an eye doctor appointment today. Just a yearly checkup. My right eye changed just a smidge...my left eye not at all. Ok...later...