Ah! vous dirais-je, maman (drabble)
Title: Ah! vous dirais-je, maman
Pairing: QMi
Genre: Crack
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Princesses did not have mothers, according to most fairytales.
Disclaimer: I surely don't own anybody in this!
Note: Total crack. Side drabble to A not-so-typical fairytale. The title comes from a very old nursery rhyme to which Mozart composed a melody to (Twinkle Twinkle Little Star in English).
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Ah! vous dirais-je, maman
The princess, like most of the princesses, did not have a mother. Years ago, her father had unfortunately married a witch who could not stand the social ways of this world and who, one day, had run away to live a life of solitude. That had happened before little Rachel had come to live in the castle and no one had heard about the lost queen ever again.
Fortunately, the princess had not been too affected by the lost of her mother - it was not as if her fellow princesses had any mothers to begin with - but did wonder, sometimes, when she was thinking about others than herself, why her father had not remarried yet.
It must be said that the princess, to begin with, was not one to be very observant as she was, most of the time, centered on herself. That was why she had quite a shock when she surprised her father and the head doctor frolicking in the throne room.
A feminine gasp and wide eyes were followed by a yell of,
“MY EYES! Ew! EW!”
The king immediately pushed his companion - who had been straddling his thighs while he had been sitting on his mighty throne - away to land on his generous behind, on the lovely scarlet red carpet, while the princess tried to cover her eyes more even though her palms were already flat against her eyelids.
She, however, continued with the yelling, probably alerting half of the castle with her high-pitched voice, “Can you not keep it in your room, Father?! I did not need to see this!”
The king quickly straightened himself and quickly ran to the royal maiden, eyes suddenly all innocent and hands in the air. “It is not what you think, my daughter!” he also said in a high-pitched tone, panic in his voice.
The princess stopped with the yelling and crossed her arms as she gave a sceptical look to her father,
“Sure, Baba,” she used the informal way to call him, “It is not what I think. Doctor Cho was, of course, just proceeding with your regular physical exam, which meant observing your pulse very closely and making sure it did not accelerate too much while manually checking if your reproductive system still responded well!”
Kyuhyun, the young head doctor, snickered. King Zhou Mi wore an expression of utter horror on his face.
“Baobei!” he whined, resulting in the use of her lovely nickname.
She sighed, “I don’t mind who you’re fucking - or who you’re being fucked by - but please, don’t play doctor in the damn throne room!”
Kyuhyun was now literally rolling on the carpeted floor. Zhou Mi seemed to be on the verge of a heart attack,
“Baobei! Who taught you such words?!”
“At least, I hope you were not taking advantage of him,” she muttered her thoughts out loud.
“BAOBEI!” the king whined even more while Kyuhyun was on the verge of dying from too much laughter, “It is me you should be worried about being taken advantage of!” he pouted.
“Right...” the princess said sceptically, watching as the young doctor caught his breath back.
She spent the next few seconds looking from her panicking father to her nonchalant head doctor with serious eyes.
She finally nodded, as if giving her approval, and proceeded to leave. As she opened the door - her father had probably sent all of the guards out of the room to have a little privacy, so there was no one to open the door for her - she turned around for the last time,
“By the way, Father...”
The king bit in lower lip in apprehension.
“... you are so gay.” she shook her head and left.
Zhou Mi collapsed on his throne while Kyuhyun was hit with another fit of laughter.
The king pouted, arms crossed. Kyuhyun calmed his melodious laugh before saying,
“She’s right, you know,” and continued with the laughter.
(“Oh Sungmin, am I really that unobservant? the princess dramatically asked as she laid her head on her prince’s shoulder.
As far as she knew now, everybody in the castle had known about the king’s affair with the head doctor.
He squeezed her hand, “Of course not, my lady.”
She pouted. It was the adorable and lovely, but also very enticing, pout she had inherited from her father.
Prince Sungmin closed his eyes, I hope we’ll get married soon. Very soon.)
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Pairing: QMi
Genre: Crack
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Princesses did not have mothers, according to most fairytales.
Disclaimer: I surely don't own anybody in this!
Note: Total crack. Side drabble to A not-so-typical fairytale. The title comes from a very old nursery rhyme to which Mozart composed a melody to (Twinkle Twinkle Little Star in English).
________________________________________________
Ah! vous dirais-je, maman
The princess, like most of the princesses, did not have a mother. Years ago, her father had unfortunately married a witch who could not stand the social ways of this world and who, one day, had run away to live a life of solitude. That had happened before little Rachel had come to live in the castle and no one had heard about the lost queen ever again.
Fortunately, the princess had not been too affected by the lost of her mother - it was not as if her fellow princesses had any mothers to begin with - but did wonder, sometimes, when she was thinking about others than herself, why her father had not remarried yet.
It must be said that the princess, to begin with, was not one to be very observant as she was, most of the time, centered on herself. That was why she had quite a shock when she surprised her father and the head doctor frolicking in the throne room.
A feminine gasp and wide eyes were followed by a yell of,
“MY EYES! Ew! EW!”
The king immediately pushed his companion - who had been straddling his thighs while he had been sitting on his mighty throne - away to land on his generous behind, on the lovely scarlet red carpet, while the princess tried to cover her eyes more even though her palms were already flat against her eyelids.
She, however, continued with the yelling, probably alerting half of the castle with her high-pitched voice, “Can you not keep it in your room, Father?! I did not need to see this!”
The king quickly straightened himself and quickly ran to the royal maiden, eyes suddenly all innocent and hands in the air. “It is not what you think, my daughter!” he also said in a high-pitched tone, panic in his voice.
The princess stopped with the yelling and crossed her arms as she gave a sceptical look to her father,
“Sure, Baba,” she used the informal way to call him, “It is not what I think. Doctor Cho was, of course, just proceeding with your regular physical exam, which meant observing your pulse very closely and making sure it did not accelerate too much while manually checking if your reproductive system still responded well!”
Kyuhyun, the young head doctor, snickered. King Zhou Mi wore an expression of utter horror on his face.
“Baobei!” he whined, resulting in the use of her lovely nickname.
She sighed, “I don’t mind who you’re fucking - or who you’re being fucked by - but please, don’t play doctor in the damn throne room!”
Kyuhyun was now literally rolling on the carpeted floor. Zhou Mi seemed to be on the verge of a heart attack,
“Baobei! Who taught you such words?!”
“At least, I hope you were not taking advantage of him,” she muttered her thoughts out loud.
“BAOBEI!” the king whined even more while Kyuhyun was on the verge of dying from too much laughter, “It is me you should be worried about being taken advantage of!” he pouted.
“Right...” the princess said sceptically, watching as the young doctor caught his breath back.
She spent the next few seconds looking from her panicking father to her nonchalant head doctor with serious eyes.
She finally nodded, as if giving her approval, and proceeded to leave. As she opened the door - her father had probably sent all of the guards out of the room to have a little privacy, so there was no one to open the door for her - she turned around for the last time,
“By the way, Father...”
The king bit in lower lip in apprehension.
“... you are so gay.” she shook her head and left.
Zhou Mi collapsed on his throne while Kyuhyun was hit with another fit of laughter.
The king pouted, arms crossed. Kyuhyun calmed his melodious laugh before saying,
“She’s right, you know,” and continued with the laughter.
(“Oh Sungmin, am I really that unobservant? the princess dramatically asked as she laid her head on her prince’s shoulder.
As far as she knew now, everybody in the castle had known about the king’s affair with the head doctor.
He squeezed her hand, “Of course not, my lady.”
She pouted. It was the adorable and lovely, but also very enticing, pout she had inherited from her father.
Prince Sungmin closed his eyes, I hope we’ll get married soon. Very soon.)
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