Zephyrhills
i am home for Christmas now. we decorated the house today. wreathes. garland. lights. all that stuff. plus my mom has an obession with anna lee dolls, only the christmas kind. so we have them peeking out everywhere. we got a tree today too. it was one of the biggest at the tree store, but it looks kinda small in our new big house. but with all the familar Christmas decorations, the house looks more like home.
and i like being home and all. something is wrong though. i don't know what it is. i have a nagging feeling it is me. i want to scream all the time. like, "AHHHH" scream. Even now after everyone is asleep. i miss orlando. i miss my young life girls. i miss feeling like i belonged somewhere, i have a purpose in orlando. i am a student. and a young life leader, and a friend, and a cousin/niece. Here i am a daughter and a sister, which is just as important! But i am not sure how to be a daughter or a sister.
And of course that girlie part of me hates the idea of going through the holidays alone. i don't actually want a boyfriend, its the idea of it that sounds good. we hung mistletoe. and new years will roll around. and God still has me single. hum. it is better that way when i think logically.
i hope you all have a Merry Christmas!!
and i like being home and all. something is wrong though. i don't know what it is. i have a nagging feeling it is me. i want to scream all the time. like, "AHHHH" scream. Even now after everyone is asleep. i miss orlando. i miss my young life girls. i miss feeling like i belonged somewhere, i have a purpose in orlando. i am a student. and a young life leader, and a friend, and a cousin/niece. Here i am a daughter and a sister, which is just as important! But i am not sure how to be a daughter or a sister.
And of course that girlie part of me hates the idea of going through the holidays alone. i don't actually want a boyfriend, its the idea of it that sounds good. we hung mistletoe. and new years will roll around. and God still has me single. hum. it is better that way when i think logically.
i hope you all have a Merry Christmas!!