(no subject)
i was walking to class today and I realized something.
i am having a good day.
again.
:)
I am happy.
I think.
I think.
I hope.
but i really do think
i can do this.
I was walking
carrying all of my books, a paper and a coffee
wearing cloths that make me feel good.
cloths that I like.
my hair is down and it looks good.
I look good.
and I feel good.
in my head.
i feel good.
I feel loved.
and a little scared.
scared that this is a joke.
that maybe this is one of scerwtape's evil tricks
and tomorrow it will all dissappear.
but i looked at myself and for the first time in my life
i think i am everything that i had ever hoped i could be and more.
when you think about the person you are going to turn out to be
sitting in front of the mirror as a 12 year old... who doesn't even fill out
a AAA bra... smearing on bright blue sparkly eyeshadow in the morning before school.
hating your frizzy hair and awkward ways,
lack of friends and chaotic house.
i am a woman.
i am smart.
i am not perfect.
not perfect by far.
but i am learning to love my imperfections.
i am learning to love people and take care of people.
when i was young my mother loved me
and i want everyone i come into contact with to feel that love and support.
god, hold me in this place.
i beg you,
hold me in this place.
and don't let me go this time.
i am having a good day.
again.
:)
I am happy.
I think.
I think.
I hope.
but i really do think
i can do this.
I was walking
carrying all of my books, a paper and a coffee
wearing cloths that make me feel good.
cloths that I like.
my hair is down and it looks good.
I look good.
and I feel good.
in my head.
i feel good.
I feel loved.
and a little scared.
scared that this is a joke.
that maybe this is one of scerwtape's evil tricks
and tomorrow it will all dissappear.
but i looked at myself and for the first time in my life
i think i am everything that i had ever hoped i could be and more.
when you think about the person you are going to turn out to be
sitting in front of the mirror as a 12 year old... who doesn't even fill out
a AAA bra... smearing on bright blue sparkly eyeshadow in the morning before school.
hating your frizzy hair and awkward ways,
lack of friends and chaotic house.
i am a woman.
i am smart.
i am not perfect.
not perfect by far.
but i am learning to love my imperfections.
i am learning to love people and take care of people.
when i was young my mother loved me
and i want everyone i come into contact with to feel that love and support.
god, hold me in this place.
i beg you,
hold me in this place.
and don't let me go this time.