(no subject)
Im more depressed then i have ever been in my whole life......i wish my pain would just go away..i get no happiness and when i see my friends that is my ONLY happiness and there is still pain that i hide when i am with them..I just cant get away from being depressed i really scare my self sometimes i dont wanna end up you know....i no i will never be gothic or anything but i dont wanna be depressed...Its falling into a matter where tha only person who can make me smile and i really am not hiding behind it would be zach he is my life and i love him..he is tha only thing that can truely heal me right now and thats not gonna help all tha way..and i guess it looks like zach and i are both really screwed up...i dont blame ppl for not liking me at my skool im effing screwed up and i know this i need zachs help and hes not here!! Hes my best friend hes suppose to be here....but instead im here for him and i am proud of myself for not giving up on him like i did my dad becuz i NEED him more then anything.............i hate my life and i need a break