Nine...
I didn't realize I could be so scared, yet so excited for the same thing at one point. On August 9th I will be leaving Rockford for Grand Valley. Last year, it somehow seemed so much like camp. I was going to school, but I was still going to be able to get home if needed. I would sleep over there and do things, but at the drop of a hat, I could call my parents and see them. This year, it's so much different. Obviously, I won't be any farther away. But, coming home will happen much less often. I don't get that much time off, unfortunately. And, it's not just for a few months at a time here and there, it's for the whole year minus Christmas (and even then, I'll probably still spend part of break at GV). No longer will I really be a Rockford resident, as much as I will truly miss my hometown. For eleven of the twelve months of the year, I will be living in Allendale; an almost permanent resident of Grand Valley State University.
And my friends will be back in Rockford for a couple of weeks, but even then, they'll leave. It's very hard. I love my friends. I love the ones here in Rockford and I love the ones at Grand Valley and it hurts me to know that I can't have it all at the same time. That I have to switch it on and off like a lightbulb. It's very disconcerting. It's harder this year, too. Much harder. I don't know why.
It's still exciting. In many ways, it's much more exciting to go back this year than it was to start there last year. It was so unexpected last year; I could crash and burn. This year, that fear is almost completely gone. I know what I'm getting myself into. But, at the same time, leaving my friends (and yes, leaving my family) seems like it's going to be so much harder. All of my emotions, everything is intensified so much.
So in nine days, I'll make my return to Grand Valley. And I can't wait for that to happen. I can't wait to see everyone, to start training, to do all of those fun things I love doing there. At the same time, it's so soon. I have one last big hurrah with the friends in Chicago before I leave...