Trapped: Chapter 9
Title: Trapped
Pairings: Yoochun/Junsu, implied Yunho/Jaejoong
Rating:NC-17
Genre: Romance, Drama, Humor, Angst
Warnings: Language, sexual content,suggested anxiety/panic disorder, mentioning of death (none of the main characters).
Length: 9/?
Summary: With his entire future planned out for him Yoochun has lead an predictable life until the day
he met Junsu, a shut-in who hasn’t left his room for many years in a row. Throw in some excessively random colleagues, insane friend and growing forbidden feelings and all of a sudden Yoochun’s life seems to get more complicated than it has ever been.
~~~
“Do you?” Junsu asked.
Yoochun frowned his eyebrows in worry. It sounded strangely like a marriage vow, but Junsu’s face didn’t match, looking up at him dead serious. The heavy rain streamed over his face and passed his eyes, almost like tears.
Yoochun hesitated. He didn’t have to look up to know there were people looking from behind the hotel windows. His uncle and Taeyeon were probably out there too, watching him with hawk eyes, ready to attack if he made a wrong move.
Junsu looked at him almost pleadingly. When he exhaled his breath was visible as a white puff in the air. Is it even that cold? Yoochun leaned in closer and pressed his nose against Junsu’s, or at least his body did, strangely out of his control.
“I do,” he heard himself say, and he knew he sincerely meant it.
The reaction was almost immediate; a bright smile grew on Junsu’s face. The rain didn’t let up, but it seemed lighter somehow, tickling rather than drowning them.
“Good,” Junsu smiled with an almost childish innocence, and brushed Yoochun’s face with his hand.
Yoochun knew he shouldn’t, they were all watching, but his heart was beating so fast and the longing was so strong, it almost physically hurt not to kiss him.
Junsu’s lips tasted like rainwater, strangely warm against the cold of the air, but so comfortable, so right. His hands had somehow ended up underneath Junsu’s shirt, roaming over the slick, warm skin, increasing his longing even more.
He felt dizzy from the lack of oxygen but couldn’t stop, deepening their kiss further and further, needing to feel Junsu closer than he already was. He heard Junsu smother a moan when he pressed into him, his hands reaching…
~~~
Beep beep beep be…
In a very unsophisticated and possibly barbaric manner Yoochun smashed the alarm clock off the table. The poor thing beeped once or twice more before it died an insignificant death, just like many of his predecessors.
With a groan Yoochun turned around, trying his best to recollect the last part of his dream so he could go on and finish… finish… Yoochun blinked. Did he just dream what he thought he had dreamt?
Aish, Yoochun you’re such a twisted pervert, Yoochun thought furiously before he rolled out of his bed with a scowl. If it wasn’t bad enough that he had spent at least half the night turning, thinking about why exactly he had been kissing Junsu, he had now dreamt about it too.
Yoochun muttered something, annoyed with himself, as he walked towards the shower and turned it on far too cold to be healthy.
When he was clean and his mind slightly more cleared up, he had somehow managed to talk everything right again. It wasn't even a real kiss, and come on, it’s not like I dreamt of him naked and I totally wasn’t going to have sex or anything… no way… It didn’t sound convincing at all, not even to him.
Mumbling annoyedly to nobody in particular, he walked towards the tiny kitchen and took out a bowl of one thing or another before he looked up at the clock: a little before nine. He frowned; nine? It was Saturday today, why the heck did he set an alarm in the first place? He did what any sane man would do: he turned around and made his way back towards his bed and he was just about to lurch into it when his phone vibrated.
The restaurant my father chose for us to have breakfast at is really boring! I’d rather see the hotel where you work. I presume you’re already on your way, so why don’t you just pick me up and we’ll go to your hotel together? Don’t leave me waiting too long!
X Taeyeon.
Confused Yoochun stared down at the message. Who the hell is Tae… oh… my god. Shocked, he eyed his clock. What time were they supposed to meet again? Nine? Half past? While cursing loudly, he grabbed his stuff together and flew out of the door, only to return five seconds later because he had forgotten his wallet.
---
In total he was late by fifteen minutes, not a bad score, he thought to himself. Unfortunately, Taeyeon didn’t seem that pleased.
“Are you always this late?” When she looked this annoyed, she resembled her mother, which was rather disturbing really.
“I suppose?” Yoochun smiled. What else was he supposed to say? ‘Yeah sorry, I was too busy dreaming about getting it on with a guy which pretty much made me forget about your entire existence.’ Nope, not a good idea. “But I’ll buy you an extra large ice cream to make up for it, ok?” He opened the door so she could get into his car.
“No thanks,” Taeyeon answered shortly. “Ice cream makes me fat, just buy me something before our next date. I like earrings.”
Yoochun couldn’t help but smile a little. This sure was different from any of the girls he had dated so far. It could get interesting.
Unfortunately, it didn’t. For the entire ride to the hotel she talked solo, discussing and gossiping about the members of her, apparently very exclusive, social circle. Who was dating who, who was going to wind up hurt about it. Once or twice Yoochun subtly tried to turn the conversation to another subject, but she would simply ignore him and ramble on. Even after they had arrived she kept on chatting while he opened the door for her.
“So, I told Jessica: you have to dump that guy, he’s totally after Tifanny. But like I said, she didn’t, and now she’s all whiny towards me that her boyfriend cheated on her. I mean, duh, have you even taken a proper look at yourself?! Come on…”
Yoochun nodded absentmindedly as he guided her towards the hotel where he was pleasantly surprised to see Jaejoong, who was not as lucky as him to have his Saturdays off.
“Ah, Jae,” he called, interrupting Taeyeon who was still babbling on about some skin-product she’d recommended to someone or another. “I’d like you to meet…”
“Hi,” Taeyeon smiled and bounced forward, “his fiancé,” she stuck her hand out and Jaejoong shook it.
“Fiancé?” He asked, eyeing Yoochun, surprised. “I didn’t know you were dating?”
“Well we…”
“It’s an arranged marriage,” Taeyeon intervened, “You are?”
“Kim Jaejoong,” he smiled politely, “nice to meet you.”
“Pleasure,” Taeyeon said, not impolite, before she returned her attention to Yoochun. “Now, guide me. I want to see where you work.”
Yoochun smiled at her in what he hoped was a sincere way. There was a fine line between knowing what you wanted and being downright bossy and he felt like she wasn’t on the good side right now. “Sure, where would you like to start first? Maybe the kitchens?”
Jaejoong coughed. “Ehm… Yoochun, you might not want to do that because there are still some you-know-whats in the you-know-where.”
Taeyeon stared at him blankly.
“Ah right, well, how about we go to the back? There is a very nice courtyard where…”
Jaejoong shook his head. Yoochun frowned. “I presume the basement is still…”
Jaejoong shook his head once more, “You will want to avoid that place as well.”
“Hey, why don’t we just go somewhere else,” Yoochun suggested, knowing this wasn’t going to get them anywhere.
“No. I came all the way here to get a tour, and I won’t leave until I get one,” she stated firmly before turning around and making her way towards, how else could it, the basement.
Yoochun was already half way to preventing her from going downstairs when Yunho opened the door and walked inside while, for no apparent reason, being shirtless.
“Oh hold it missy,” he smiled, Taeyeon practically bumping into him, “this is a no go area, I’m sorry.”
Taeyeon stared at his muscled torso, up at his face, and back at his chest.
“Oh, hey Yunho,” Yoochun said, “this is my fiancé, Kim Taeyeon-ah.”
“Well what a pleasure,” Yunho said, “I would give you a hand but unfortunately they’re a little gross right now,” he smiled sheepishly. “Nice to meet you though Kim Taeyeon-sshi. I hope Yoochun here isn’t giving you too much trouble.”
“Not at all,” Taeyeon said breathless. Yoochun had trouble not frowning at the sudden attitude change. “And you can just call me Taeyeon-ah.”
“Sure,” Yunho smiled before bowing a little. “Now if you don’t mind, the boss is calling." He pointed at Jaejoong.
“Oh, yeah, I understand,” Taeyeon smiled breathlessly before taking a step back. Yoochun wasn’t feeling too comfortable about this. Even though he couldn’t say he was attached to her, downright swooning over one of his colleagues while she was supposed to be looking at him wasn’t really good for his ego either.
“Hey why don’t we…” he started, but Taeyeon ignored him, completely occupied with a conversation that was going on behind him.
“… and where is your shirt?” he could hear Jaejoong say, somewhat annoyed.
“I took it off to impress you. You don’t like it?” Yunho wiggled his eyebrows suggestively as he leaned on the counter like the real macho man he was pretending to be.
“Whatever,” Jaejoong said, but he appeared rather flushed. No wonder everyone things they’re secretly getting it on every night. Yoochun couldn’t help but smile. “Just go back downstairs. You can flash yourself to everyone outside of working time,” Jaejoong snapped.
Yunho just grinned, “whatever you say,” and turned around. “Back to kill some rats,” he winked at Yoochun and bowed politely to Taeyeon.
Yoochun rolled his eyes at the terminator-like behaviour Yunho was flashing and returned his attention back to Taeyeon who, by now, didn’t look so well.
“Eh… Taeyeon?” he asked, slightly nudging the very pale girl. She wasn’t going to get sick now was she? “Are you ok?”
“Did you… did you just say rats?” she asked Yunho in a strange squeaky voice.
“Well, we’re busy exterminating them, so they should be gone soon but…” Yunho’s face changed when he saw Yoochun's and Jaejoong's thunderous gaze. “Oops?”
But it was too late. Taeyeon had already fled outside, screaming some insults at Yoochun, as this was obviously his fault, before demanding he’d take her back home, indicating just the beginning of what was soon to become a very hectic evening.
---
In the meantime Junsu still sat in his room, as ever, staring at his panda toy from his desk chair. He felt empty inside. Of course Yoochun must’ve had a good reason he hadn’t visited him yet, even though it was already past dinner time. He was probably just busy, but why hadn’t he texted? He sighed and turned back towards his pc-game, which wasn’t as interesting as he remembered it to be.
Maybe he had done something wrong. He had been rather difficult about going outside yesterday. That could have caused Yoochun to finally realize how boring he really was. Or maybe it was because of his lack of reaction when Yoochun had kissed him. Should he have kissed him back? Maybe he should’ve… or he could at least have walked after him instead of standing there like some sort of zombie with a serious brain shut-down. Aish, why are you so stupid? He roughly brushed his hands through his hair, completely messing it up before laying his head on top of his desk.
Downstairs the front door opened and closed, and even though he hadn’t heard the doorbell, which meant it probably wasn’t Yoochun, he still couldn’t help his heart from beating slightly faster. Swiftly he shuffled towards his door, leaned against it and listened intently if he could hear anything. There were indeed voices downstairs, one of them male, hoarse and low, full of authority.
His heart sped up, but this time not in a good way.
Quickly he clicked the door in its lock and ran towards his bed, took the panda and stuffed it underneath his blankets.
He heard footsteps up the stairs.
With his heart in his throat he tried to mess up his blankets in such a way the toy wouldn’t show, quickly returning back towards his desk when he was satisfied enough.
A knock sounded.
“Junsu-yah?” his mother's voice came ever so gentle from the other side. “Your father is back, why don’t you come downstairs and greet him?”
“I don’t want to,” Junsu replied, his mouth inconveniently dry, “tell him I’m sick.”
“Junsu, it would save the both of us a lot of trouble if you’d just…”
“I said I don’t want to,” he snapped, immediately regretting it. It was times like this when he felt more embarrassed than ever towards his mother.
For a second there was no sound and then he could hear his mother’s footsteps disappear. He knew it would only be a matter of seconds though, before they would return and she would ask again, first pleading, then probably crying, maybe going as far as begging him on her knees. But he also realized that in the end she would just go downstairs again and tell her husband their son wouldn’t come down. Wouldn’t come down because he was such a failure, too big a coward to even face his own father.
Junsu’s lip trembled as his hand clenched over his computer mouse. Just breathe, think about something good, think about music, think about HyukJae’s rambling, think about Yoochun…
“Junsu, open that door,” his father suddenly pounded on the door, startling Junsu completely. “I know you’re in there!”
His breathing sped up massively before Junsu rolled his chair backwards, facing the door with wide, shocked eyes. This isn’t happening…
“Where is the key?” his father asked, probably to his mother, from the other side of the door. Junsu couldn't quite make out the answer but he could pretty much guess. There was only one key, and it was inside his room.
As silently as he could he paced towards his bed and took the panda from underneath his blankets. He knew the animal was more in danger than he was but he needed it right now. Nervously he started to fumble with its ear while he eyed the door cautiously.
“Open that door right now, you hear me!” he sounded positively furious now. Junsu still didn’t move.
After a while the pounding finally stopped, leaving the room awkwardly silent.
When he was sure his father was gone he tried to draw a shaky breath, but it somehow remained stuck half way. Great, just what I needed. He closed his eyes, knowing very well how hard it was to get out of a panic attack once it had fully started. Just breathe, just relax… he mumbled some self-invented lyrics, copying something of what Yoochun had once showed him while filling it up with his own words.
It was starting to work, slowly he could feel the stress ebbing away from his system and being replaced with a mere discomforted feeling, when something very loud made him yelp.
Shocked he stared at the door. Another loud bang. Was his father trying to break the door down or what? When a third bang sounded, the entire doorframe squeaking in protest, he realized, he was doing just that.
Junsu did the first thing that came to his mind. He jumped up and ran towards the door, hoping that if he pulled the clink up strongly enough he could somehow prevent the man from entering. But he was too late. With a final loud thud the lock gave in, causing the door to swing open inside, missing Junsu by barely an inch.
He stared at the broken lock in shock, then up at his father, who appeared not to have changed a bit since the last time he saw him, except for a very dark flush on his cheeks.
“So, now we can finally…”
Junsu did the first thing that came to his mind, barely aware of what he was doing. “Get out of my room!” he yelled, way louder than he had thought himself capable of.
“As long as I’m paying for this house it’s…” his fathers voice trailed off as he spotted something on the bed. “What’s that,” he asked, his voice so dangerously low even the for five seconds brave Junsu no longer dared to say anything. He took a step forward, and grabbed Junsu’s, or rather his brother’s, old panda toy, ragged ear and all.
“I thought you said you threw everything away?” he spat at Junsu’s mother who still sat in the hallway and had by now reduced to a mere sobbing.
“I… I didn’t know… he had it…” she cried, “please. It’s just a toy…”
“Just a toy?!” his father shouted, “it belongs to that darned brat!”
His mother started to sob louder, but Junsu couldn’t comfort her. All he could do was stare at the toy, now sadly bungling in his father's hands.
“That’s it, this house has been in the claws of that little mistake for quite long enough,” his father snapped before turning around and storming down the stairs.
For a moment Junsu just stood there, not knowing what to do. He looked at his mother, who was still sitting on the floor with her face buried in her hands. All he wanted to do was go back inside his room and sleep, but he knew it wouldn’t feel safe.
He took one step towards her before a strange smell halted him. Something was burning.
An adrenaline rush shot through his body as he started running down the stairs. Was his father setting the place on fire? He wouldn’t… would he?
Junsu crossed the hall and entered the kitchen where the smell seemed to come from. A large dark plume of smoke indicated there was indeed something burning, but it wasn’t the house. Inside the sink, by now already half eaten away by the flames, lay his toy.
Junsu yelped as he ran towards the sink but got halted by his father’s hands halfway.
“Leave it,” his father spoke in his forever cold and stern voice.
“No,” Junsu cried out, “it’s mine, let go of me, I need it!” He somehow managed to struggle loose, and lurched towards it, desperately trying to pull the ablaze toy out of the sink. His hands almost got burned several times before he realized there was a tap. Pulling the tap up he filled the sink with water quickly, pushing the panda underneath the water.
He kept the water running while drawing squeaky breaths. Please please, don’t die… he wasn’t even sure if he was talking to his toy or his brother. He had never really liked his brother, now had he? Not really…
“Fuck,” he exclaimed as he accidently slammed a burned spot against the tap before turning it off. Vaguely he realized his father had disappeared, probably back upstairs to scold his mother, but he didn’t care. Motionless, he was staring at the thing inside his hands: it was no longer a plushie, not even a vague reminder of it, but just smouldered, wet remains of fur and one half blackened button eye. He stared down at the button, no tears, just stared down at it.
Faintly he tried to scrape the black parts off.
“Junsu that’s enough,” his father snapped behind him as he threw something that appeared to be a bag towards him. “The day after tomorrow you’ll be coming with me back to China, go pack your bags now!”
Junsu ignored him. Feeling utterly deserted. He realized his toy was really gone, just like his brother, and pretty much everything he had ever had in life. He stared down at the blackened mess underneath his fingers.
“Junsu.”
“Leave me alone,” Junsu spoke softly, shrugging off the hand his father had laid on his shoulder.
“Now you just listen to me!”
Without waiting for what exactly his father was going to shout at him, Junsu turned around. The button clenched tightly in one hand, he pushed his father aside with the other. Not even stopping to put on a coat, he opened the front door and stormed outside, directly into the heavy rain. There was no way he was ever, ever going back inside the house and inside that life again.
A/N: Omg, the beginning of this chapter... I'm so annoying xD Sometimes I even surprise myself! Anyways, I guess everything will get a lot more serious from this chapter on -.- (but the ratproblem'll get solved soon as well ^^ that compensates, right? ... no?)