Nobody Knows: Chapter 13
Title: Nobody Knows
Pairing(s): Yunho/Jaejoong, a.o.
Genre: Romance, Angst, Drama, Humor
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Incest, Sexual content (involving minors)
Length: 13/15
Beta'd by: daramjwi
Summary: In a broken family two brothers cling onto each other for affection, but when their childlike need for attention result in less and less innocent experiments, things go downhill fast. Struggling with jealousy, forbidden attraction and the desperate need to be loved, Yunho and Jaejoong keep forgetting about one thing: What would happen if someone found out?
---
After the success of their first time Yunho regained his confidence and Jaejoong was delighted to note that his little brother had turned back to his old, experimental self. Even though he had to admit that first time was far from comfortable, Yunho's tender care and eagerness to try again made it all better. While the winter passed by and the first spring flowers began to sprout, their mother was absent more often again. She still wasn't gone every night, like before, but once every two weeks she'd stay over at her boyfriend's place for two or three days. Those were opportunities he and Yunho never missed.
The first few trials started of as clumsy; one time Yunho tore their last condom in his excitement, another time Jaejoong wasn't looking at what he was doing when he reached for the lube and kneed Yunh by accident, who had spend the next hour or so whimpering. But gradually they started to get the hang of things. And the more Jaejoong grew accustomed to the feeling of having Yunho inside of him, the more he started to crave for it. Sometimes it was all he could think about, and the relief when it was finally just the two of them again was almost as intense as the orgasms he gave him every single time. The thought that whatever they were doing was wrong barely crossed his mind; it felt too good.
When he walked back home from school on that frosty Friday afternoon his mind was already lingering towards that night. Last time he and Yunho had tried to have sex in the bathroom, but that had proven a failure. They were so used to their secrecy that any place outside of their comfortable, locked bedrooms felt like a potential threat. In the end they had rushed back to Yunho's room in fluffy towels and with their hair still dripping. They had wound up against the desk, and eventually on the floor. The mere thought made his heart flutter and anticipating for what might happen tonight.
Like always he yelled 'I'm home' the moment he entered the house, and then reminded himself Yunho wasn’t home yet; he was doing research for some paper at Kangin's place and would not be back until later. He picked the mail up from the floor, kicked off his shoes and flopped down the couch.
It was the same as usual: a letter from mister Jung written to Yunho, some envelopes he identified as bills, an unfamiliar 'court' noted letter and a postcard from Jihyo, who had somehow wound up in Australia. After reading the postcard he put all the letters aside and fished his notebook out of his backpack to start drawing.
No inspiration came.
While he tapped his pencil against his bottom lip Jaejoong glossed over the 'court' letter that lay on top of the pile. It wasn't the envelope itself that drew his attention-over the past few weeks he had seen quite a few of those come by-but the red stamp on the cover. Urgent, it read. Curiously he scooted the envelope’s way, lifted it up and tried to peak inside to see what the contents were without actually opening it. It didn't work.
He placed the letter back down, took his pencil and stared at his paper, wishing for inspiration. He gave up. With an exasperated groan he rolled over, stood up, went towards his mother's desk where he found an opener, and re-entered the living room. After opening the envelope he felt a little guilty towards his mother, but that did not stop him from reading it.
It looked formal, but also very different from the usual bills he saw his mother handle. The top read 'summation', and it was directed at his mother. His frown deepened when he trailed his eyes over the lines, over the case subject named Jung Yunho current age fourteen and the date of trial. He halted at the bottom line, ‘request for parental custody transfer, as filed by biological father: Jung Yanghyun’.
---
At the other side of town Yunho was staring at Kangin's computer screen. Because Kangin was the only one who owned a computer he and Heechul had decided to go to his place to write their report for next week's history class. The fact that they had more than a week left to get this done was not really beneficial for their motivation however. After barely ten minutes they had ended up talking about nothing but games and movies. In the end Kangin and Heechul had gone out to get themselves 'well earned snacks', Yunho being forced to stay and keep up the pretense that someone was doing something useful. Knowing his friends they wouldn't be back for another hour.
Bored he clicked away the window he had been playing snake in and opened his mailbox, then opened snake again, and ended with reading a web page advising women on how to please their partners. Most of it he had already read before-his inventiveness in bed did not come out of thin air-but then his eyes caught sight of something that was new.
'The male g-spot: how to give your man the most intense orgasm of his life.'
He looked over his shoulder, making sure no one was there before he scooted his desk chair closer and scrolled down the page to the interesting parts. Absorbed he drew his notebook out, fervently taking notes until the front door opened and Heechul shouted he had chocolate bars that he would trade for a kiss on his feet. Panicked Yunho closed the tabs, threw his notebook back in his backpack and had just finished deleting the search history when his two friends entered the room.
Heechul came in first, and narrowed his eyes at him. "Were you watching porn?"
"No!" he exclaimed, but by the time his friends found out he had deleted the history, he could no longer convince them otherwise.
It didn't really matter however; his notebook was overflowing with new ideas and tonight he and Jaejoong would be by themselves again. The happy smile that had crept on his face halfway through the ride back home would not disappear, and by the time he entered the house and shouted that he was home he was grinning like a fool. He took off his shoes and coat and had just dumped them in a corner when he noticed something. The house smelled like food, burning food.
"Hyung?" He walked inside the living room, towards the kitchen where he noticed Jaejoong rested half on top of the dinner table, focused on one of his sketches. Behind him the meat on the stove was turning black and Yunho rushed towards it, taking it off the stove before something caught fire. Dazed Jaejoong looked up.
"Ah, I wasn't paying attention," Jaejoong stated the obvious, getting up quickly and taking the pan to see if the food could still be saved. It was clear it couldn’t. Yunho glanced at the drawing Jaejoong had been working on, but was surprised to note the paper showed only doodles and insensible scribbles. Jaejoong rarely burned his food, but that he hadn’t even being occupied with something important was worrying.
Unsettled he eyed his older brother, who made an unenthusiastic attempt to scrape the blackened meat off the bottom of the pan. "Are you okay?" he asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine."
The lie was undeniable and the fact that Jaejoong refused to look up at him only emphasized that. He waited for his brother to give up on the food, and when Jaejoong turned to walk away, took his hand and halted him.
"I said I was fine," Jaejoong repeated a little stiffly, caught his eyes and bit his lip before he looked down again. He seemed far from fine. Yunho waited, leaning against the counter with Jaejoong's hand loosely locked in his. "There was a letter for mom," Jaejoong said eventually, pulling his hand away before he folded his arms over his chest and turned to face Yunho. Not for the first time Yunho noticed that he was starting to outgrow Jaejoong and was looking down on his older brother instead of up.
"And?" he asked.
"I think she and your dad are fighting over your custody."
Yunho frowned as he waited for his brother to explain in terms he could understand.
"If your dad wins it would mean you... You'd have to leave here and live with him."
He sighed, relieved. He had expected something much worse. "Well that's easy to solve, isn't it?" he said, shrugging his shoulders. "I'll just go to court and tell him I want to stay here."
Jaejoong glanced up at him, his posture still stiff, and fumbled with his shirt. "You're underage, I'm not sure it'll be that easy."
He eyed his brother and took pity on Jaejoong, who looked small and breakable the way he was standing; his thin shoulders were visible through the thin fabric of his slightly too large shirt. He took a step forward and pulled him into a hug. "Don't worry about it," he said confidently, "If that doesn't work we can always just run away and live at Jihyo's place." That idea had never crossed his mind before, but it didn't sound too bad. Jaejoong would be finished with middle school in a few weeks and he only needed one more year. They could both get a job after that and wait until they had earned enough money for their own place and then-
"Did your dad mention something about this before?" Jaejoong's muffled voice sounded from the sweater he had pressed his nose in.
He tried to remember, and replied without giving it much though, "Yeah, now that you mention it, he said something about us going to the States once because of-"
"The States?" Jaejoong said in a high and panicked voice, pulling away from Yunho's arms and looking up.
"I already told him I had no interest," Yunho replied quickly. Jaejoong seemed on the verge of crying now. "Let's not talk about this anymore, okay?" Yunho said desperately the moment he realized that no matter what he said he was only going to make it worse. "And let's go out and have dinner somewhere, I'm hungry."
Jaejoong nodded, but not wholeheartedly so. Even after they had gone outside and reached the district Yunho had chosen for dinner he remained uncharacteristically quiet.
"What do you want to eat?" he asked, pretending to be unaware of his brother's gloomy mood.
"I don't really care," the muttered reply came, "You can choose."
Yunho did; roughly ten minutes later they were seated on the wobbly stools of a street food stand, a royally sized bowl filled with fried chicken and spicy rice cake Yunho clumsily tried to pull apart with cocktail sticks placed in front of them. Jaejoong was watching him, his hands rested on his lap, his woolly beanie pulled over his ears and his collar set high. Even though spring was coming closer their breaths formed puffs of smoke in the frosty air, Jaejoong's cheeks were flushed pink from the cold.
"Here," Yunho said, holding out an exceptionally large chunk of chicken for Jaejoong to eat.
"You know, I can feed myself," his brother muttered right before Yunho fed him the piece. He sniffled a little, shifted in his seat, but leaned in the moment Yunho held out a spicy rice-cake.
The old, female shop clerk was watching them closely, the corners of her small mouth curling upward, but neither of them paid attention to it.
"You feel better?" Yunho asked once he had stuffed the sixth piece inside Jaejoong's mouth, taking short breaks only to feed himself. Jaejoong nodded, smiling a little when Yunho cooed at him and told him to stop being ridiculous. This only encouraged Yunho to belittle him more.
"You're so cute," Yunho said when Jaejoong mumbled he would punch him if he didn't stop that soon, and to his delight his older brother blushed. The familiar butterflies were wildly dancing in his stomach and his smile broadened.
"Hand me your bowl."
Both of them looked up when the old lady took the bowl from Yunho's hands. She filled it to the brim and handed it back. Confused Yunho looked down on it, Jaejoong already reaching for his wallet.
"No, this one is on me." She winked, something that might have appeared suggestive if it wasn't for her innocent, grandmotherly appearance. She leaned towards Yunho and whispered. "You don't find girls like this often kid, make sure you hold on to her."
Yunho blinked, dumbfounded and completely at loss over what she was talking about when he heard her whisper to herself: 'puppy love, so cute’. He turned to his brother, who was staring at the woman as if she had just tried to murder their cat. Then he burst out in laughter.
"Yah," Jaejoong hissed so that the woman wouldn't hear, "That's not funny! I don't even look like a girl, there must be something wrong with her eyes."
"Ah honey," Yunho replied, enjoying this way too much. "It's okay, you can be a girl if you like, I'll love you anywa-" He yelped when Jaejoong smacked his head, almost dropping the food.
"Yah! Do you have a death wish?!"
"Ah, but Jaejoongie~" Yunho pouted, receiving another slap. He quickly held out the extra food, pointing out they got it for free because of Jaejoong's girly charm, and could only just prevent from being hit again.
---
By the time they arrived back home it was past ten and Yunho could barely move his fingers with how stiff the cold had made them. He rushed inside, sighing with gratitude for the warmth and kicked off his shoes. When he hung his coat on the hook he noticed Jaejoong trying to take off his shoes while balancing on one foot. He grinned, secretly hoping Jaejoong would fall so he could catch him and use that as an excuse to kiss him straight away. Jaejoong didn't.
"What are you looking at?" his brother asked as he took off his coat. His mood was a lot better than a few hours ago, Yunho could tell from his expression, and he decided he didn't need an excuse. Pressing Jaejoong against the hung up coats he leaned in and stopped right before their lips touched. Jaejoong looked up, surprised. His hands were rested in the nape of Jaejoong's neck, and he could feel his rapid heartbeat right through the tender skin. He smiled, tilted his head and kissed him.
Kissing Jaejoong had turned into second nature by now, as familiar and effortless as going to sleep in the evening or brushing his teeth, except that it was a lot more pleasurable. He parted his lips, feeling his brother's tongue ghost over his before pressing in. Sometimes they would tease each other, at other times they would turn it into a game of who could last the longest without suffering from a jaw lock or lack of oxygen, but not this time. This time Yunho kept his kiss simple, deep but gentle, stopping at the right time, only to start over again when they had regained their breath.
Not for the first time he wondered if what he was feeling was normal. He wasn't stupid, he knew what they were doing certainly wasn't-or at least he had never heard of someone else doing the same things with their siblings. But the consistent longing towards his brother's body, the almost suffocating need to hold him close, keep him hidden from the world and only to himself, were what worried him the most. He wanted Jaejoong to be his and his alone, and the intensity of this need that was growing every day was a little frightening.
"I should take a shower," Jaejoong breathed against his lips, breaking their kiss.
"Hyung..." he started hesitantly, and brushed through his brother's hair. "We’ll always stay together... right?" He felt terribly insecure all of a sudden.
Jaejoong smiled. "Silly, of course we will," he replied, full of his old confidence. "No matter what happens." He wrapped his arms around Yunho's shoulders and pressed their foreheads together. "In the end there's nothing that matters but the two of us, just remember that."
Yunho nodded, his hands loosely rested on Jaejoong's hips. Lately the times where he really felt like the younger one were scarce, but this moment was one of them.
"Now am I allowed to go and take a shower or do you want to stand here for the rest of the night?"
The other's smile was soothing and Yunho dared to let go. "Can I-"
"No joining," Jaejoong beat him to it, flinging his sweater on the couch and halfway taking off his shirt. "Give me half an hour."
"Half an hour?" Yunho groaned exasperated, secretly glad Jaejoong didn't linger on the things he had just blurted out. Then again, they never lingered long on anything. "What do you even do in there?"
"Wash myself," came the simple reply, and Yunho had nothing to say to that.
It seemed as if Jaejoong's 'half hour' lasted for days, and by the time he finally came out and Yunho was allowed to go in he had decided two minutes was long enough for a bath. He quickly rushed through the shower, washed everything he could reach and dried off in a matter of seconds. When he returned to Jaejoong's room in nothing but his boxers the other was still busy blow-drying his hair, looking startled when Yunho took the dryer out of his hand and pulled him off his chair and onto the bed.
"Yah, Dongsaeng!" Jaejoong laughed, not caring to stop Yunho from pulling away the towels that covered his body. "Is this how you treat your Hyung?"
"Yes," Yunho stated, quickly jumping off the bed to turn of the main light and shut the door. "I want to try something new." He slipped in between Jaejoong's legs, looking around and deciding on Jaejoong's pillow to stuff underneath his brother's tailbone. His brother’s hips were now slightly elevated.
"Something that requires the door closed and a pillow under my butt?" Jaejoong asked amused.
"Definitely."
He drew out the new bottle of lube Jaejoong had bought them a few days back and cracked his knuckles. His brother cast him a disturbed look.
"You're not going to do something perverted, are you?"
"Depends on your definition of perverted," Yunho replied, parting Jaejoong's legs before sliding his hands down his inner thighs. Jaejoong was still soft, but he'd take care of that.
"Yunho..." His name was spoken like a warning and he replied by looking up as innocently as possible.
It didn't work, like it usually didn't. And so instead he replied, "Nothing too weird, I swear. Now sit back, relax, and let the master do his work."
He pretended not to see Jaejoong rolling his eyes and started massaging his thighs, leaning in and softly biting the tender flesh. He had once placed a bet with Jaejoong over who could make the other come the fastest and he had been very proud that it had cost him barely a minute to get Jaejoong off. The fact that his brother had managed in half that time he still considered unfair, since he had been second and was already turned on by then. But today he wasn't aiming on getting Jaejoong off, at least not yet, and definitely not as fast as possible.
When he had made sure Jaejoong was hard enough, the other’s breathing irregular while muttering him to hurry up already, he sat back and took the lube. "Tell me when it hurts, okay?"
Jaejoong nodded, his gaze unfocused. He was too far gone already to care what Yunho did to him. He gave himself a mental reminder to stop his teasing a little sooner next time.
He watched his brother's features attentively. On days like this, even though it was just the two of them and they had no fear of interruptions, their preparation tended to be quick and messy. Yunho had always had a hard time not to jump his brother straight away, and usually the real experimenting started only after round two or three. Not today however, but consequently Jaejoong's entrance was still dry when he pried a finger inside of him.
Yunho went slower, pushing first one, then two digits inside of him as he held Jaejoong's erection loosely in the other hand. He shifted uncomfortably and regretted not taking the time to jerk off in the shower; his own boner was starting to get distracting.
He pressed his crotch against Jaejoong's leg for some relief and at the same time crooked his fingers, searching for the spot he had read about. "Yunho-yah," Jaejoong whispered, his legs trembling a little. "You want me to get a condom?"
He ignored his brother's unsubtle hints, pressing in deeper. Jaejoong was looking at him, his expression lidded, but nowhere near losing it yet. He changed his position, twisted his fingers and then, suddenly, realized what was being meant. The texture at the tip of his fingers felt different, but it wasn't that; Jaejoong gasped in surprise.
Feeling encouraged he tried again. He brushed over the spot softly, made circular motions around it while watching his brother's expression turn from surprised to slightly pained and then distorted with pleasure.
"You like it?" He felt a glimpse of pride when Jaejoong nodded quickly.
"What is... oh god," he moaned as he fell back onto the sheets, his eyes closed and his hand clenching the sheets. Taking the hint Yunho settled back in between his legs.
"Don't stop," Jaejoong whined when he drew his hand out to be able to settle comfortably. He gave a teasing reply, scolding him for being so needy all of a sudden, but secretly loved it. He loved being in control, but above all, he loved being able to give Jaejoong this much pleasure. While he returned to gently teasing Jaejoong's prostate he leaned in and started licking his hard-on. He began with the tip, then moved his way down the shaft to eventually take all of him.
"Y-Yun..." Jaejoong was probably trying to say he was coming close, but his breathing was labored and his words incoherent. Yunho could not remember when he had heard him panting like this before. When he looked up he saw his brother's pale cheeks were completely flushed with pleasure, his bottom lip crimson red where he had bitten it too harshly and his legs shaking against his arms. Concentrating became difficult all of a sudden.
He tried to keep his motions even, but when his own erection started to harden to full length this became impossible. Impatiently he began abusing the spot inside Jaejoong, the other's breath hitching. He wrapped his hand around Jaejoong’s erection and jerked until Jaejoong’s gasps turned to needy moans and warm ribbons of milky white semen spurted over his hand. Yunho paid no attention to it and wiped it off the bed sheets before reaching and taking a condom with trembling hands. While he pulled the rubber over his erection and took the lube again Jaejoong was still lingering in the aftermath. He was looking at him dazed, his eyes heavily lidded, but if he realized what was going on he was no longer in a state of mind to give his opinion on it.
And so Yunho lifted up his legs without asking, pressed them against his chest and pushed his way inside. His brother's lips parted, but not a sound came as his eyes fluttered close. There was no strain; he could easily slip inside without a trace of pain appearing on Jaejoong's face. There was only bliss.
"Don't pass out on me," he half joked, half pleaded as he forced his way in deeper. Jaejoong tilted his head, smiled a trembling, feeble smile and wrapped his shaking hands around his shoulders.
“I won’t…” He leaned in and kissed him.
No matter how hard Yunho tried, he could not set a steady rhythm. Jaejoong's body was too slippery and his own too set on getting release. He sat up, Jaejoong arms dropping uselessly beside him as he started pounding into him faster, groaning when his orgasm crashed over him. He tried to prevent himself from falling on top of him, but his arms gave away. With his nose pressed against Jaejoong’s shoulder he rode out his orgasm. He breathed heavily, his shaky hands wrapping around Jaejoong’s arms before he slid off him.
Completely out of breath he looked up at the ceiling, and then at his brother beside him. He let out a lighthearted chuckle when he noticed Jaejoong's still extremely dazed expression. "Was it that good?" he asked, and rolled onto his side. Jaejoong nodded, and his smile broadened. Yunho decided at that moment that this overcome, blissful Jaejoong was the one he liked best. He reached and stroked the other’s fringe out of his eyes. "So what do you say?"
"I love you."
His heart skipped a beat, confusion washing over him as he looked up at his brother. He had expected a ‘thank you’ or maybe a ‘Yunho you’re the best’, but certainly not that. "What?"
"I love you, Dongsaeng," Jaejoong hummed, shifting closer and nuzzling against Yunho's chest. “In every way possible.”
Overwhelmed, Yunho held him, staring at nothing in particular as he tried to wrap his mind around what was just being said to him. 'In every way possible...' A slow smile appeared on his lips, and he suddenly clenched Jaejoong tight.
"I love you too," he blurted out, "Every way..."
He heard Jaejoong chuckle, muttering something that sounded like 'cheesy' and before he knew it they were kissing again. Slowly, this time.
---
Previous || Next
---
Pairing(s): Yunho/Jaejoong, a.o.
Genre: Romance, Angst, Drama, Humor
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Incest, Sexual content (involving minors)
Length: 13/15
Beta'd by: daramjwi
Summary: In a broken family two brothers cling onto each other for affection, but when their childlike need for attention result in less and less innocent experiments, things go downhill fast. Struggling with jealousy, forbidden attraction and the desperate need to be loved, Yunho and Jaejoong keep forgetting about one thing: What would happen if someone found out?
---
After the success of their first time Yunho regained his confidence and Jaejoong was delighted to note that his little brother had turned back to his old, experimental self. Even though he had to admit that first time was far from comfortable, Yunho's tender care and eagerness to try again made it all better. While the winter passed by and the first spring flowers began to sprout, their mother was absent more often again. She still wasn't gone every night, like before, but once every two weeks she'd stay over at her boyfriend's place for two or three days. Those were opportunities he and Yunho never missed.
The first few trials started of as clumsy; one time Yunho tore their last condom in his excitement, another time Jaejoong wasn't looking at what he was doing when he reached for the lube and kneed Yunh by accident, who had spend the next hour or so whimpering. But gradually they started to get the hang of things. And the more Jaejoong grew accustomed to the feeling of having Yunho inside of him, the more he started to crave for it. Sometimes it was all he could think about, and the relief when it was finally just the two of them again was almost as intense as the orgasms he gave him every single time. The thought that whatever they were doing was wrong barely crossed his mind; it felt too good.
When he walked back home from school on that frosty Friday afternoon his mind was already lingering towards that night. Last time he and Yunho had tried to have sex in the bathroom, but that had proven a failure. They were so used to their secrecy that any place outside of their comfortable, locked bedrooms felt like a potential threat. In the end they had rushed back to Yunho's room in fluffy towels and with their hair still dripping. They had wound up against the desk, and eventually on the floor. The mere thought made his heart flutter and anticipating for what might happen tonight.
Like always he yelled 'I'm home' the moment he entered the house, and then reminded himself Yunho wasn’t home yet; he was doing research for some paper at Kangin's place and would not be back until later. He picked the mail up from the floor, kicked off his shoes and flopped down the couch.
It was the same as usual: a letter from mister Jung written to Yunho, some envelopes he identified as bills, an unfamiliar 'court' noted letter and a postcard from Jihyo, who had somehow wound up in Australia. After reading the postcard he put all the letters aside and fished his notebook out of his backpack to start drawing.
No inspiration came.
While he tapped his pencil against his bottom lip Jaejoong glossed over the 'court' letter that lay on top of the pile. It wasn't the envelope itself that drew his attention-over the past few weeks he had seen quite a few of those come by-but the red stamp on the cover. Urgent, it read. Curiously he scooted the envelope’s way, lifted it up and tried to peak inside to see what the contents were without actually opening it. It didn't work.
He placed the letter back down, took his pencil and stared at his paper, wishing for inspiration. He gave up. With an exasperated groan he rolled over, stood up, went towards his mother's desk where he found an opener, and re-entered the living room. After opening the envelope he felt a little guilty towards his mother, but that did not stop him from reading it.
It looked formal, but also very different from the usual bills he saw his mother handle. The top read 'summation', and it was directed at his mother. His frown deepened when he trailed his eyes over the lines, over the case subject named Jung Yunho current age fourteen and the date of trial. He halted at the bottom line, ‘request for parental custody transfer, as filed by biological father: Jung Yanghyun’.
---
At the other side of town Yunho was staring at Kangin's computer screen. Because Kangin was the only one who owned a computer he and Heechul had decided to go to his place to write their report for next week's history class. The fact that they had more than a week left to get this done was not really beneficial for their motivation however. After barely ten minutes they had ended up talking about nothing but games and movies. In the end Kangin and Heechul had gone out to get themselves 'well earned snacks', Yunho being forced to stay and keep up the pretense that someone was doing something useful. Knowing his friends they wouldn't be back for another hour.
Bored he clicked away the window he had been playing snake in and opened his mailbox, then opened snake again, and ended with reading a web page advising women on how to please their partners. Most of it he had already read before-his inventiveness in bed did not come out of thin air-but then his eyes caught sight of something that was new.
'The male g-spot: how to give your man the most intense orgasm of his life.'
He looked over his shoulder, making sure no one was there before he scooted his desk chair closer and scrolled down the page to the interesting parts. Absorbed he drew his notebook out, fervently taking notes until the front door opened and Heechul shouted he had chocolate bars that he would trade for a kiss on his feet. Panicked Yunho closed the tabs, threw his notebook back in his backpack and had just finished deleting the search history when his two friends entered the room.
Heechul came in first, and narrowed his eyes at him. "Were you watching porn?"
"No!" he exclaimed, but by the time his friends found out he had deleted the history, he could no longer convince them otherwise.
It didn't really matter however; his notebook was overflowing with new ideas and tonight he and Jaejoong would be by themselves again. The happy smile that had crept on his face halfway through the ride back home would not disappear, and by the time he entered the house and shouted that he was home he was grinning like a fool. He took off his shoes and coat and had just dumped them in a corner when he noticed something. The house smelled like food, burning food.
"Hyung?" He walked inside the living room, towards the kitchen where he noticed Jaejoong rested half on top of the dinner table, focused on one of his sketches. Behind him the meat on the stove was turning black and Yunho rushed towards it, taking it off the stove before something caught fire. Dazed Jaejoong looked up.
"Ah, I wasn't paying attention," Jaejoong stated the obvious, getting up quickly and taking the pan to see if the food could still be saved. It was clear it couldn’t. Yunho glanced at the drawing Jaejoong had been working on, but was surprised to note the paper showed only doodles and insensible scribbles. Jaejoong rarely burned his food, but that he hadn’t even being occupied with something important was worrying.
Unsettled he eyed his older brother, who made an unenthusiastic attempt to scrape the blackened meat off the bottom of the pan. "Are you okay?" he asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine."
The lie was undeniable and the fact that Jaejoong refused to look up at him only emphasized that. He waited for his brother to give up on the food, and when Jaejoong turned to walk away, took his hand and halted him.
"I said I was fine," Jaejoong repeated a little stiffly, caught his eyes and bit his lip before he looked down again. He seemed far from fine. Yunho waited, leaning against the counter with Jaejoong's hand loosely locked in his. "There was a letter for mom," Jaejoong said eventually, pulling his hand away before he folded his arms over his chest and turned to face Yunho. Not for the first time Yunho noticed that he was starting to outgrow Jaejoong and was looking down on his older brother instead of up.
"And?" he asked.
"I think she and your dad are fighting over your custody."
Yunho frowned as he waited for his brother to explain in terms he could understand.
"If your dad wins it would mean you... You'd have to leave here and live with him."
He sighed, relieved. He had expected something much worse. "Well that's easy to solve, isn't it?" he said, shrugging his shoulders. "I'll just go to court and tell him I want to stay here."
Jaejoong glanced up at him, his posture still stiff, and fumbled with his shirt. "You're underage, I'm not sure it'll be that easy."
He eyed his brother and took pity on Jaejoong, who looked small and breakable the way he was standing; his thin shoulders were visible through the thin fabric of his slightly too large shirt. He took a step forward and pulled him into a hug. "Don't worry about it," he said confidently, "If that doesn't work we can always just run away and live at Jihyo's place." That idea had never crossed his mind before, but it didn't sound too bad. Jaejoong would be finished with middle school in a few weeks and he only needed one more year. They could both get a job after that and wait until they had earned enough money for their own place and then-
"Did your dad mention something about this before?" Jaejoong's muffled voice sounded from the sweater he had pressed his nose in.
He tried to remember, and replied without giving it much though, "Yeah, now that you mention it, he said something about us going to the States once because of-"
"The States?" Jaejoong said in a high and panicked voice, pulling away from Yunho's arms and looking up.
"I already told him I had no interest," Yunho replied quickly. Jaejoong seemed on the verge of crying now. "Let's not talk about this anymore, okay?" Yunho said desperately the moment he realized that no matter what he said he was only going to make it worse. "And let's go out and have dinner somewhere, I'm hungry."
Jaejoong nodded, but not wholeheartedly so. Even after they had gone outside and reached the district Yunho had chosen for dinner he remained uncharacteristically quiet.
"What do you want to eat?" he asked, pretending to be unaware of his brother's gloomy mood.
"I don't really care," the muttered reply came, "You can choose."
Yunho did; roughly ten minutes later they were seated on the wobbly stools of a street food stand, a royally sized bowl filled with fried chicken and spicy rice cake Yunho clumsily tried to pull apart with cocktail sticks placed in front of them. Jaejoong was watching him, his hands rested on his lap, his woolly beanie pulled over his ears and his collar set high. Even though spring was coming closer their breaths formed puffs of smoke in the frosty air, Jaejoong's cheeks were flushed pink from the cold.
"Here," Yunho said, holding out an exceptionally large chunk of chicken for Jaejoong to eat.
"You know, I can feed myself," his brother muttered right before Yunho fed him the piece. He sniffled a little, shifted in his seat, but leaned in the moment Yunho held out a spicy rice-cake.
The old, female shop clerk was watching them closely, the corners of her small mouth curling upward, but neither of them paid attention to it.
"You feel better?" Yunho asked once he had stuffed the sixth piece inside Jaejoong's mouth, taking short breaks only to feed himself. Jaejoong nodded, smiling a little when Yunho cooed at him and told him to stop being ridiculous. This only encouraged Yunho to belittle him more.
"You're so cute," Yunho said when Jaejoong mumbled he would punch him if he didn't stop that soon, and to his delight his older brother blushed. The familiar butterflies were wildly dancing in his stomach and his smile broadened.
"Hand me your bowl."
Both of them looked up when the old lady took the bowl from Yunho's hands. She filled it to the brim and handed it back. Confused Yunho looked down on it, Jaejoong already reaching for his wallet.
"No, this one is on me." She winked, something that might have appeared suggestive if it wasn't for her innocent, grandmotherly appearance. She leaned towards Yunho and whispered. "You don't find girls like this often kid, make sure you hold on to her."
Yunho blinked, dumbfounded and completely at loss over what she was talking about when he heard her whisper to herself: 'puppy love, so cute’. He turned to his brother, who was staring at the woman as if she had just tried to murder their cat. Then he burst out in laughter.
"Yah," Jaejoong hissed so that the woman wouldn't hear, "That's not funny! I don't even look like a girl, there must be something wrong with her eyes."
"Ah honey," Yunho replied, enjoying this way too much. "It's okay, you can be a girl if you like, I'll love you anywa-" He yelped when Jaejoong smacked his head, almost dropping the food.
"Yah! Do you have a death wish?!"
"Ah, but Jaejoongie~" Yunho pouted, receiving another slap. He quickly held out the extra food, pointing out they got it for free because of Jaejoong's girly charm, and could only just prevent from being hit again.
---
By the time they arrived back home it was past ten and Yunho could barely move his fingers with how stiff the cold had made them. He rushed inside, sighing with gratitude for the warmth and kicked off his shoes. When he hung his coat on the hook he noticed Jaejoong trying to take off his shoes while balancing on one foot. He grinned, secretly hoping Jaejoong would fall so he could catch him and use that as an excuse to kiss him straight away. Jaejoong didn't.
"What are you looking at?" his brother asked as he took off his coat. His mood was a lot better than a few hours ago, Yunho could tell from his expression, and he decided he didn't need an excuse. Pressing Jaejoong against the hung up coats he leaned in and stopped right before their lips touched. Jaejoong looked up, surprised. His hands were rested in the nape of Jaejoong's neck, and he could feel his rapid heartbeat right through the tender skin. He smiled, tilted his head and kissed him.
Kissing Jaejoong had turned into second nature by now, as familiar and effortless as going to sleep in the evening or brushing his teeth, except that it was a lot more pleasurable. He parted his lips, feeling his brother's tongue ghost over his before pressing in. Sometimes they would tease each other, at other times they would turn it into a game of who could last the longest without suffering from a jaw lock or lack of oxygen, but not this time. This time Yunho kept his kiss simple, deep but gentle, stopping at the right time, only to start over again when they had regained their breath.
Not for the first time he wondered if what he was feeling was normal. He wasn't stupid, he knew what they were doing certainly wasn't-or at least he had never heard of someone else doing the same things with their siblings. But the consistent longing towards his brother's body, the almost suffocating need to hold him close, keep him hidden from the world and only to himself, were what worried him the most. He wanted Jaejoong to be his and his alone, and the intensity of this need that was growing every day was a little frightening.
"I should take a shower," Jaejoong breathed against his lips, breaking their kiss.
"Hyung..." he started hesitantly, and brushed through his brother's hair. "We’ll always stay together... right?" He felt terribly insecure all of a sudden.
Jaejoong smiled. "Silly, of course we will," he replied, full of his old confidence. "No matter what happens." He wrapped his arms around Yunho's shoulders and pressed their foreheads together. "In the end there's nothing that matters but the two of us, just remember that."
Yunho nodded, his hands loosely rested on Jaejoong's hips. Lately the times where he really felt like the younger one were scarce, but this moment was one of them.
"Now am I allowed to go and take a shower or do you want to stand here for the rest of the night?"
The other's smile was soothing and Yunho dared to let go. "Can I-"
"No joining," Jaejoong beat him to it, flinging his sweater on the couch and halfway taking off his shirt. "Give me half an hour."
"Half an hour?" Yunho groaned exasperated, secretly glad Jaejoong didn't linger on the things he had just blurted out. Then again, they never lingered long on anything. "What do you even do in there?"
"Wash myself," came the simple reply, and Yunho had nothing to say to that.
It seemed as if Jaejoong's 'half hour' lasted for days, and by the time he finally came out and Yunho was allowed to go in he had decided two minutes was long enough for a bath. He quickly rushed through the shower, washed everything he could reach and dried off in a matter of seconds. When he returned to Jaejoong's room in nothing but his boxers the other was still busy blow-drying his hair, looking startled when Yunho took the dryer out of his hand and pulled him off his chair and onto the bed.
"Yah, Dongsaeng!" Jaejoong laughed, not caring to stop Yunho from pulling away the towels that covered his body. "Is this how you treat your Hyung?"
"Yes," Yunho stated, quickly jumping off the bed to turn of the main light and shut the door. "I want to try something new." He slipped in between Jaejoong's legs, looking around and deciding on Jaejoong's pillow to stuff underneath his brother's tailbone. His brother’s hips were now slightly elevated.
"Something that requires the door closed and a pillow under my butt?" Jaejoong asked amused.
"Definitely."
He drew out the new bottle of lube Jaejoong had bought them a few days back and cracked his knuckles. His brother cast him a disturbed look.
"You're not going to do something perverted, are you?"
"Depends on your definition of perverted," Yunho replied, parting Jaejoong's legs before sliding his hands down his inner thighs. Jaejoong was still soft, but he'd take care of that.
"Yunho..." His name was spoken like a warning and he replied by looking up as innocently as possible.
It didn't work, like it usually didn't. And so instead he replied, "Nothing too weird, I swear. Now sit back, relax, and let the master do his work."
He pretended not to see Jaejoong rolling his eyes and started massaging his thighs, leaning in and softly biting the tender flesh. He had once placed a bet with Jaejoong over who could make the other come the fastest and he had been very proud that it had cost him barely a minute to get Jaejoong off. The fact that his brother had managed in half that time he still considered unfair, since he had been second and was already turned on by then. But today he wasn't aiming on getting Jaejoong off, at least not yet, and definitely not as fast as possible.
When he had made sure Jaejoong was hard enough, the other’s breathing irregular while muttering him to hurry up already, he sat back and took the lube. "Tell me when it hurts, okay?"
Jaejoong nodded, his gaze unfocused. He was too far gone already to care what Yunho did to him. He gave himself a mental reminder to stop his teasing a little sooner next time.
He watched his brother's features attentively. On days like this, even though it was just the two of them and they had no fear of interruptions, their preparation tended to be quick and messy. Yunho had always had a hard time not to jump his brother straight away, and usually the real experimenting started only after round two or three. Not today however, but consequently Jaejoong's entrance was still dry when he pried a finger inside of him.
Yunho went slower, pushing first one, then two digits inside of him as he held Jaejoong's erection loosely in the other hand. He shifted uncomfortably and regretted not taking the time to jerk off in the shower; his own boner was starting to get distracting.
He pressed his crotch against Jaejoong's leg for some relief and at the same time crooked his fingers, searching for the spot he had read about. "Yunho-yah," Jaejoong whispered, his legs trembling a little. "You want me to get a condom?"
He ignored his brother's unsubtle hints, pressing in deeper. Jaejoong was looking at him, his expression lidded, but nowhere near losing it yet. He changed his position, twisted his fingers and then, suddenly, realized what was being meant. The texture at the tip of his fingers felt different, but it wasn't that; Jaejoong gasped in surprise.
Feeling encouraged he tried again. He brushed over the spot softly, made circular motions around it while watching his brother's expression turn from surprised to slightly pained and then distorted with pleasure.
"You like it?" He felt a glimpse of pride when Jaejoong nodded quickly.
"What is... oh god," he moaned as he fell back onto the sheets, his eyes closed and his hand clenching the sheets. Taking the hint Yunho settled back in between his legs.
"Don't stop," Jaejoong whined when he drew his hand out to be able to settle comfortably. He gave a teasing reply, scolding him for being so needy all of a sudden, but secretly loved it. He loved being in control, but above all, he loved being able to give Jaejoong this much pleasure. While he returned to gently teasing Jaejoong's prostate he leaned in and started licking his hard-on. He began with the tip, then moved his way down the shaft to eventually take all of him.
"Y-Yun..." Jaejoong was probably trying to say he was coming close, but his breathing was labored and his words incoherent. Yunho could not remember when he had heard him panting like this before. When he looked up he saw his brother's pale cheeks were completely flushed with pleasure, his bottom lip crimson red where he had bitten it too harshly and his legs shaking against his arms. Concentrating became difficult all of a sudden.
He tried to keep his motions even, but when his own erection started to harden to full length this became impossible. Impatiently he began abusing the spot inside Jaejoong, the other's breath hitching. He wrapped his hand around Jaejoong’s erection and jerked until Jaejoong’s gasps turned to needy moans and warm ribbons of milky white semen spurted over his hand. Yunho paid no attention to it and wiped it off the bed sheets before reaching and taking a condom with trembling hands. While he pulled the rubber over his erection and took the lube again Jaejoong was still lingering in the aftermath. He was looking at him dazed, his eyes heavily lidded, but if he realized what was going on he was no longer in a state of mind to give his opinion on it.
And so Yunho lifted up his legs without asking, pressed them against his chest and pushed his way inside. His brother's lips parted, but not a sound came as his eyes fluttered close. There was no strain; he could easily slip inside without a trace of pain appearing on Jaejoong's face. There was only bliss.
"Don't pass out on me," he half joked, half pleaded as he forced his way in deeper. Jaejoong tilted his head, smiled a trembling, feeble smile and wrapped his shaking hands around his shoulders.
“I won’t…” He leaned in and kissed him.
No matter how hard Yunho tried, he could not set a steady rhythm. Jaejoong's body was too slippery and his own too set on getting release. He sat up, Jaejoong arms dropping uselessly beside him as he started pounding into him faster, groaning when his orgasm crashed over him. He tried to prevent himself from falling on top of him, but his arms gave away. With his nose pressed against Jaejoong’s shoulder he rode out his orgasm. He breathed heavily, his shaky hands wrapping around Jaejoong’s arms before he slid off him.
Completely out of breath he looked up at the ceiling, and then at his brother beside him. He let out a lighthearted chuckle when he noticed Jaejoong's still extremely dazed expression. "Was it that good?" he asked, and rolled onto his side. Jaejoong nodded, and his smile broadened. Yunho decided at that moment that this overcome, blissful Jaejoong was the one he liked best. He reached and stroked the other’s fringe out of his eyes. "So what do you say?"
"I love you."
His heart skipped a beat, confusion washing over him as he looked up at his brother. He had expected a ‘thank you’ or maybe a ‘Yunho you’re the best’, but certainly not that. "What?"
"I love you, Dongsaeng," Jaejoong hummed, shifting closer and nuzzling against Yunho's chest. “In every way possible.”
Overwhelmed, Yunho held him, staring at nothing in particular as he tried to wrap his mind around what was just being said to him. 'In every way possible...' A slow smile appeared on his lips, and he suddenly clenched Jaejoong tight.
"I love you too," he blurted out, "Every way..."
He heard Jaejoong chuckle, muttering something that sounded like 'cheesy' and before he knew it they were kissing again. Slowly, this time.
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