(no subject)
I know I haven't posted. Only reason I am now is because I somehow managed to grab enough sleep to be somewhat lucid. It's 3:45am, though, so not like anyone will read this. :D
I have summer school 32 hours a week, and I work another 20-30. I'm taking three classes: chem, math and psychology, and I'm still slaving away over computers and crappy customers. I'm considering looking for a new job (especially after the new Fry's here opens up) but I really love being a GeekSquad Agent. I'll wait for the fulltime Double Agent spot to open up and see if I get it. If not, and if my year review doesn't bring a suitable raise (it's in August.. geez, have I been at BBY that long?) then I'll consider looking around.
Oh, I have a new car now. '03 Jetta. I love it. Now I can belong to the Car Made In The Past 10 Years Club.
I'm not currently in a relationship anymore.. but I am. But I'm not. But I am. But I'm not. I truthfully don't know sometimes. The relationship is technically over but calling someone dead doesn't keep them from living and breathing. I've never loved someone I wasn't sure I wanted to be with so much.
I've come to a lot of painful realizations about myself. The most important of which, and the one that took the most self-cajoling to admit, is that I'm currently too screwed in the head for a serious relationship. Whether or not I can finish my current one semi-gracefully (after I've already tripped and kicked it) remains to be seen, but afterwards I doubt I'll be looking for anything that involves commitment until I can get myself sorted out.
Heh. And I want to be a counselor someday. Physician heal thyself, eh?
I've lost almost all interest in computers and gaming outside of work. It's sad. Or rather, I don't have time to foster my interest and expand on my knowledge. I'd love to throw a blog up again (maybe one I'll actually update this time), get back into php, mysql, asp, learn Flash, teach my little brother a few tricks (I'm raising him into geekdom :D), build a new PC, have a few overnight LAN parties... all I can do now is barely get enough sleep to go to school again the next day.
I miss my friends on here. I miss the people I've lost time for, and the people who think I've abandoned them. I haven't. You think I've forgotten you exist; I still think about you every day. And you know who you are.
My mom once asked me if I was happy with my life. I told her no, I wasn't, but I knew that while all the stress and school and work and bills suck now, they're an important part of what I want to do with my life down the road. Money will allow me to get an education which will allow me to get more money which will allow me to get a better education so I can finally be happy with what I do, and be able to support a family. These are just the growing pains of becoming an adult.
Pff. Adult. I'm 20 and that word still has such little meaning.
So yes. That's what I've been up to.
I have summer school 32 hours a week, and I work another 20-30. I'm taking three classes: chem, math and psychology, and I'm still slaving away over computers and crappy customers. I'm considering looking for a new job (especially after the new Fry's here opens up) but I really love being a GeekSquad Agent. I'll wait for the fulltime Double Agent spot to open up and see if I get it. If not, and if my year review doesn't bring a suitable raise (it's in August.. geez, have I been at BBY that long?) then I'll consider looking around.
Oh, I have a new car now. '03 Jetta. I love it. Now I can belong to the Car Made In The Past 10 Years Club.
I'm not currently in a relationship anymore.. but I am. But I'm not. But I am. But I'm not. I truthfully don't know sometimes. The relationship is technically over but calling someone dead doesn't keep them from living and breathing. I've never loved someone I wasn't sure I wanted to be with so much.
I've come to a lot of painful realizations about myself. The most important of which, and the one that took the most self-cajoling to admit, is that I'm currently too screwed in the head for a serious relationship. Whether or not I can finish my current one semi-gracefully (after I've already tripped and kicked it) remains to be seen, but afterwards I doubt I'll be looking for anything that involves commitment until I can get myself sorted out.
Heh. And I want to be a counselor someday. Physician heal thyself, eh?
I've lost almost all interest in computers and gaming outside of work. It's sad. Or rather, I don't have time to foster my interest and expand on my knowledge. I'd love to throw a blog up again (maybe one I'll actually update this time), get back into php, mysql, asp, learn Flash, teach my little brother a few tricks (I'm raising him into geekdom :D), build a new PC, have a few overnight LAN parties... all I can do now is barely get enough sleep to go to school again the next day.
I miss my friends on here. I miss the people I've lost time for, and the people who think I've abandoned them. I haven't. You think I've forgotten you exist; I still think about you every day. And you know who you are.
My mom once asked me if I was happy with my life. I told her no, I wasn't, but I knew that while all the stress and school and work and bills suck now, they're an important part of what I want to do with my life down the road. Money will allow me to get an education which will allow me to get more money which will allow me to get a better education so I can finally be happy with what I do, and be able to support a family. These are just the growing pains of becoming an adult.
Pff. Adult. I'm 20 and that word still has such little meaning.
So yes. That's what I've been up to.