Year #2, Entry #2
Happy Birthday Sharon!
Birthday's are fun...even if they aren't your own.
So far, So Good...
At the beginning of last week I was having some difficulities with classes, loans, work...everything. However now things seem to be working out, getting back on track. This means i can focus on my friends err..on my studies. Now i should be showering and running some birthday errands, yet that whole motivation thing is lacking. I think its a conspiracy once you get to college. Somehow? Oh since i have been back, some really great things have happened. I have seen some familar faces, which is great. However today was the best. I saw my one, my only fiance. It was amazing. I was in Group 6, room 156, and as class ends, I am walking down the hall, past room 153, the big auditorium, and there he was. Walking out of there with such a presence. With another familar face i might add. I watched them walk together in casual conversation. As simple as it was, I wanted to be a part of it. I felt my mouth go to an automatic grin. Funny how that happens. Predictably though, i didnt say hi. So typical as Erich has pointed out to me. "The usual McParland" Maybe I will see him again on Wednesday.
Hah, i just re-read that and it made me feel so...silly. childish. immature. as fake as the 'engagement' and wedding that never happened. such as my life.
Nothing Compares to You
It's the 4 month anniversary of when my grampa died. My grampa was big into cars, he would get a new one atleast every two years. fully equipped. one thing though, he would never listen to the radio. However, if he ever had a cd in, it was always Sinead O'Connor. Of all artists. My Grampa loved the song Nothing Compares to You. He wasn't the biggest fan of my rendition. But i think about it now, and it just makes me laugh. Even when he was in Rehab (which we all thought he'd come home from) he was talking about buying a new car. I had suggested a Conversion Van because he and my gramma had one back in the late 80's. he mistaked me for saying a "Vigrin Van" then was saying "Kelel (which he called me)we do not talk about these things, we do not use those words" Joking around of course. Maybe that story means nothing to you. But i have this fear that if i dont write them down, stories of him and my Papa, i'll forget them. So there was one(two) of them.
bare with me please?