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Should it be that I, in no small way, have found myself in a quandry, a situation wrought by myself and the wildy schizophrenic synapses which fire around inside my head much like a small time warlord with an itchy trigger finger and a penchant for self pity. Mired in my own doubts and bi-polarity, as much use as a cardboard belt in a monsoon. My
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It's too easy to blame Hollywood for the diaspora you're, we're, enduring. The human condition, loss, suffering- and desire, essentially, to overcome these things (the looking and edifying through whatever external means)- has been packaged up neatly into categories of 'true love', 'overcoming adversity', 'family values' and 'allegiance to nation/state' largely by Hollywood, or the corporate shenanigans it represents- films dispense ideology with subtlety and ease (the mythology that if it bears high production values and a cast of celebrities and familiar faces, it consequently must be of high moral bearing and a valuable cultural artifact) - but you could just as easily blame this overarching sense of human loss on Freudian concepts (loss of womb comfort), or in post-structuralist thinking, the detachment one feels when subjugated in linguistic modes. If one's mind is structured within semiotic formations, the identity, or meaning, of one's self is continual in deference, pointing irrevocably toward a meaning that is forever just out of reach, or trying to articulate itself perfectly- but cannot, because language is a faulty system of signs, that holds no truth.
Giant robots, ask anyone, should frankly be left in the 80s where they belong.
Happiness as an attainable state of mind, a lasting experience you work toward and achieve, is I think, an immature dream and a futile pursuit. I feel excitement, and hope- but emotions are tied specifically to moments, constructed from a billion different variables in your biology, environment, company- and on a post-concious level, I would even say, mood, and how electrons between you and the people around you are affecting each other.
It's in our nature, or culture- to be colonisers, to appropriate knowledge, or people, or land- and make it safe, make it our own. With the people I interact with, I have come to realise that they are just as unique, alone, and on their own as I am. This renders our interaction, our friendships beautiful. When we come together and express ideas, writing together, making films as we did at Uni, the bands I've played with- we're just a group of individuals overcoming our dissatisfaction with the world, subconciously, through creative means. It's healthy. And fortunately, it's in our nature to desire to transcend the unsatisfactory boundaries of the human condition. I read a novel recently in which a character, a Professor from an American University, declared that life should not be a race toward happiness or an idyll, but rather the pursuit of incredible experiences.
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