its real now
its real now
its a choice now
its work now
i kinda wanna run, but i know i wont be happy
i know im happy now
i know it hurts when we fight but god that feeling when he looks in my eyes says he loves me cant live with out me and hes sorry
i cant live without him cant live without that love cant walk away from him
and for once in my god damn life. im with someone i shouldnt walk away from
with a guy that loves me, isnt a lying cheating asshole just telling me what i wanna hear
god fucking forbid he has opinions of his own that arent the same as mine. i cant just get scared because he is his own person and isnt just faking what i wanna see
i love that person that he is. that he is his own person and he is real
and he loves me
holy crap i found him he loves me! the way i love him. yeah this is gonna be hard so yeah i get to work on a relationship that is actually fucking worth it. amazing. i was scared but i read my last 40 or so posts. and i remembered what they did to me. how they hurt me how they fucked me up.
so i dont know how to make him happy so its work bring it on
as long as he says i love you i still want you at the end of the day
i love him but i saw today how this could fail if i dont do my part. it is a choice and yes there are options
lisa today was like you should come to fremont and have slumber party and go clubbing and blah blah blah
and i was like no i cant i have a boyfriend.. but the thing is i could. but i dont want to. those things never made me happy like he does. they entertained me but it always felt empty and fake and like i wasnt good enough.. when i love him when i look in his eyes and see how he sees me. i dont feel empty i dont feel not good enough i feel amazing i feel gorgeous i feel perfect
thats not a choice
im choosing perfection, perfection at the cost of real work, over friendships that are almost (almost is a very important word here i have a couple that i have very much under valued that are true) completely shallow and fake
you. i dont even like you anymore... looking back im not sure i ever did. you are selfish and judgmental and just too much damn work. and i dont get shit and what i get i have to fight and degrade myself for.. fuck that but mostly just fuck you
i guess today i just saw our fallibility
but i not sure thats a bad thing. unless i see it i cant stop it
as long as its just a fairytale i cant trust it.
now that its a choice to say i trust you knowing we might fuck this up.
its real
its has more value
i love him
its a choice now
its work now
i kinda wanna run, but i know i wont be happy
i know im happy now
i know it hurts when we fight but god that feeling when he looks in my eyes says he loves me cant live with out me and hes sorry
i cant live without him cant live without that love cant walk away from him
and for once in my god damn life. im with someone i shouldnt walk away from
with a guy that loves me, isnt a lying cheating asshole just telling me what i wanna hear
god fucking forbid he has opinions of his own that arent the same as mine. i cant just get scared because he is his own person and isnt just faking what i wanna see
i love that person that he is. that he is his own person and he is real
and he loves me
holy crap i found him he loves me! the way i love him. yeah this is gonna be hard so yeah i get to work on a relationship that is actually fucking worth it. amazing. i was scared but i read my last 40 or so posts. and i remembered what they did to me. how they hurt me how they fucked me up.
so i dont know how to make him happy so its work bring it on
as long as he says i love you i still want you at the end of the day
i love him but i saw today how this could fail if i dont do my part. it is a choice and yes there are options
lisa today was like you should come to fremont and have slumber party and go clubbing and blah blah blah
and i was like no i cant i have a boyfriend.. but the thing is i could. but i dont want to. those things never made me happy like he does. they entertained me but it always felt empty and fake and like i wasnt good enough.. when i love him when i look in his eyes and see how he sees me. i dont feel empty i dont feel not good enough i feel amazing i feel gorgeous i feel perfect
thats not a choice
im choosing perfection, perfection at the cost of real work, over friendships that are almost (almost is a very important word here i have a couple that i have very much under valued that are true) completely shallow and fake
you. i dont even like you anymore... looking back im not sure i ever did. you are selfish and judgmental and just too much damn work. and i dont get shit and what i get i have to fight and degrade myself for.. fuck that but mostly just fuck you
i guess today i just saw our fallibility
but i not sure thats a bad thing. unless i see it i cant stop it
as long as its just a fairytale i cant trust it.
now that its a choice to say i trust you knowing we might fuck this up.
its real
its has more value
i love him