(no subject)
Rolling over, my eyes opened suddenly when I realized the sun was coming straight in and blinding me. What the hell? I sat up and quickly got out of the bed, holding onto my head as I got up and closed the blinds. My head was pounding and gee, that could be because I drank myself into a beer induced coma last night? Probably. Wiping my eyes, I stared around the room and wondered where Spike went off too, of course that was until I heard movement in the closet. Eh, just leave him there. Sat back down on the bed and tried to figure out what I should do. I wondered how Faith was at the moment and I wanted to call, but I wasn't going to. I didn't want to hear that her and Wes are going to raise this baby and now it was bye bye Xander. Just because that baby is technically Wes' ... I ... I don't know what I should do.
Things are changing too fast for me, I'm more of a sticking kind of guy but this? This was mind blowing and I didn't know what I should do. Should I go home, beg her to take me back for even leaving? No, of course not. For once they should be begging me back! Faith should anyway, I'm tired of being the one to beg. But, all I knew was that we were married and all I wanted was her. Even if the baby wasn't mine.
I saw the way she looked at Wes and now I'm kicking myself in the ass. I should have stayed. Should have stayed with her. Glanced over at the phone before laying back on the bed. I'd wait. Until tonight so I could see her. And besides, Spike couldn't go anywhere right now. Daylight.
*******
"So are we goin' then?" Spike asked and I looked at myself in the mirror. Right now it was now or never and besides, if I had Spike there with me? She'd take it all out on him and not me. I could do this. I wanted her back and this was how it was going to be.
"Yeah," I said and then grabbed my keys and wallet before we both walked out of the door and back down to the car.
The ride didn't take too long. I parked outside of the apartment building and took a few deep breaths.
"Oh please, Harris. Just get this over with. Sure everythin' will work out in the end, yes?" He asked and got out of the car so he could light up a smoke. I just shook my head and got out before going inside the apartment building. I walked slowly up the stairs and wondered what was about to happen. Would she even want me back? I wasn't sure. I knew I wanted her back no matter what. She ... she knew what she was to me and I just wanted that feeling back. When I opened the door and walked inside, I frowned though. It was so quiet. Moving from room to room, I stopped in the hallway and then it all sank in. She left.
I heard footsteps and then Spike walked in, looking around. We shared a look and I kicked the wall before walking back to the living room and sitting down.
"She's gone," I said quietly and held my head down. What the hell was I going to do now?
Things are changing too fast for me, I'm more of a sticking kind of guy but this? This was mind blowing and I didn't know what I should do. Should I go home, beg her to take me back for even leaving? No, of course not. For once they should be begging me back! Faith should anyway, I'm tired of being the one to beg. But, all I knew was that we were married and all I wanted was her. Even if the baby wasn't mine.
I saw the way she looked at Wes and now I'm kicking myself in the ass. I should have stayed. Should have stayed with her. Glanced over at the phone before laying back on the bed. I'd wait. Until tonight so I could see her. And besides, Spike couldn't go anywhere right now. Daylight.
*******
"So are we goin' then?" Spike asked and I looked at myself in the mirror. Right now it was now or never and besides, if I had Spike there with me? She'd take it all out on him and not me. I could do this. I wanted her back and this was how it was going to be.
"Yeah," I said and then grabbed my keys and wallet before we both walked out of the door and back down to the car.
The ride didn't take too long. I parked outside of the apartment building and took a few deep breaths.
"Oh please, Harris. Just get this over with. Sure everythin' will work out in the end, yes?" He asked and got out of the car so he could light up a smoke. I just shook my head and got out before going inside the apartment building. I walked slowly up the stairs and wondered what was about to happen. Would she even want me back? I wasn't sure. I knew I wanted her back no matter what. She ... she knew what she was to me and I just wanted that feeling back. When I opened the door and walked inside, I frowned though. It was so quiet. Moving from room to room, I stopped in the hallway and then it all sank in. She left.
I heard footsteps and then Spike walked in, looking around. We shared a look and I kicked the wall before walking back to the living room and sitting down.
"She's gone," I said quietly and held my head down. What the hell was I going to do now?