A Road I Doth Travel Thru
OK so here's the deal. I am making the turns now in this "road" that I doth travel thru. SO with only four months left I'll finally achieve a goal: I'm getting the fuck out of dodge and leaving Saginaw!! I know people don't want me to leave, they want me to go to SVSU with them so we can all be a happy family...or until they find what THEY want and leave me in the dust. What happened? What happened to us and staying together as friends? What YOUR future? What about mine? What if I gave it all up of haveing a scholarship and a future at Ferris? Would it be my fault that I let my friend make me stay? Yeah, so I'm taking the first step towards my future and going to Ferris. If you are really my friends, you'd be happy and you'd still talk to me.
But before I go, I've got some things to let off. Dude, you will get the girl. you always do and maybe this time she'll be the "ladie" you're looking for, but quick question. Haven't you ever thought that you really were in the middle, because since she became availible you did your typical thing: you would spend all your time hanging around them, building up something, and WEDGING other people so that it's just you and them. That's what you did to me. I could barely get a moment edgewise with my best friend without you coming up, flirting like you always do, and lets say using the same tactics you always use on "the ladies." Because of that, she barely talks to me, seems like we're fading away, because the best thing me and her once had, fell because YOU WANT TO GET WITH HER and cut me out of the equation and you know that even a little distance, causes people to stop talking. Thanks pal, you are the best. Plus it's not like she'd go for me. I'm too much of a good friend, you are more the friend that would try to hook up with someone. and you say you can read girls, that because the way you work, seduction makes it a whole lot easier.
I have this new best friend, she has a lot of problems in her life and they are more then I can even handle. She has her 1st bf, who i know she loved very much, it was her first boyfriend. I can relate. However, he's being a dick to her and giving her shit all over their off-and-on break up. To me the way she described it, he told her that he's all she got and she can't do any better then him. Now to me that isn't true, you know the odds of your first love being "the one?" NOT REAL LIKELY! And she wanted something better and her next bf didn't cut it as well as he should. And I've told her that he should be the kind of person that I've been to her the last couple of weeks. But he hasn't and now she's got it harder, and I fear that I am running out of resources that could help her out. I've done OK so far but bad things keep popping up in her life and I can't sit and watch and it's sucking that all I'm doing isnt helping her. I want her to be happy, I want her to find that one guy that will make her change her perspective. And moreover the truth is that I want to be that guy. I want to be the one guy who will make her happy and just give her all the love she needs and deserves. I dont know if she sees that at all. I've told her that I do want to go out with her but I don't want to push her to going out with me, she told me she did that once and it didnt turn out well.Right now she's taking some time to think, and YOU SHOULD THINK IT ALL THROUGH. And she might find what she's looking for. If she gave me a chance, I would show her what I got. So far I've made her feel better and I have shown importance in her life. I know that means a lot to both of us, and nothing anyone could do or say would make me look at her differently. She's grown to be a greater person then I thought. She just has that adversity that no one needs so young in life. I promised her that I would stop at nothing to show her that she's not what she thinks. All I want before I leave is that one chance to show her that there is someone out there for her, and what they say isn't empty in content at all. Will you let me have the chance, please? I hope you're not sick of hearing this becasue this has been a big base of the conversations we've had. And you know that I'm your friend first, and if you'd like to try something more [and better] that I'd be happy to try it next. Get back at me on that.....soon.
Well I'm done spilling my guts, and I think this is my longest journal log ever. Growing up give you a lot to think about. Now I'm going to bed. So those who aren't sleeping thru thins, thanks for reading. I promise the next one will be a lot shorter.
But before I go, I've got some things to let off. Dude, you will get the girl. you always do and maybe this time she'll be the "ladie" you're looking for, but quick question. Haven't you ever thought that you really were in the middle, because since she became availible you did your typical thing: you would spend all your time hanging around them, building up something, and WEDGING other people so that it's just you and them. That's what you did to me. I could barely get a moment edgewise with my best friend without you coming up, flirting like you always do, and lets say using the same tactics you always use on "the ladies." Because of that, she barely talks to me, seems like we're fading away, because the best thing me and her once had, fell because YOU WANT TO GET WITH HER and cut me out of the equation and you know that even a little distance, causes people to stop talking. Thanks pal, you are the best. Plus it's not like she'd go for me. I'm too much of a good friend, you are more the friend that would try to hook up with someone. and you say you can read girls, that because the way you work, seduction makes it a whole lot easier.
I have this new best friend, she has a lot of problems in her life and they are more then I can even handle. She has her 1st bf, who i know she loved very much, it was her first boyfriend. I can relate. However, he's being a dick to her and giving her shit all over their off-and-on break up. To me the way she described it, he told her that he's all she got and she can't do any better then him. Now to me that isn't true, you know the odds of your first love being "the one?" NOT REAL LIKELY! And she wanted something better and her next bf didn't cut it as well as he should. And I've told her that he should be the kind of person that I've been to her the last couple of weeks. But he hasn't and now she's got it harder, and I fear that I am running out of resources that could help her out. I've done OK so far but bad things keep popping up in her life and I can't sit and watch and it's sucking that all I'm doing isnt helping her. I want her to be happy, I want her to find that one guy that will make her change her perspective. And moreover the truth is that I want to be that guy. I want to be the one guy who will make her happy and just give her all the love she needs and deserves. I dont know if she sees that at all. I've told her that I do want to go out with her but I don't want to push her to going out with me, she told me she did that once and it didnt turn out well.Right now she's taking some time to think, and YOU SHOULD THINK IT ALL THROUGH. And she might find what she's looking for. If she gave me a chance, I would show her what I got. So far I've made her feel better and I have shown importance in her life. I know that means a lot to both of us, and nothing anyone could do or say would make me look at her differently. She's grown to be a greater person then I thought. She just has that adversity that no one needs so young in life. I promised her that I would stop at nothing to show her that she's not what she thinks. All I want before I leave is that one chance to show her that there is someone out there for her, and what they say isn't empty in content at all. Will you let me have the chance, please? I hope you're not sick of hearing this becasue this has been a big base of the conversations we've had. And you know that I'm your friend first, and if you'd like to try something more [and better] that I'd be happy to try it next. Get back at me on that.....soon.
Well I'm done spilling my guts, and I think this is my longest journal log ever. Growing up give you a lot to think about. Now I'm going to bed. So those who aren't sleeping thru thins, thanks for reading. I promise the next one will be a lot shorter.