3146: If Only If Only - Kiara Rabeau
Here is day eighteen. Kiara is the daughter of Simba and Nala from the Lion King.
TITLE: If Only If Only (I believe the title is missing a comma...)
PERPETRATOR: The Dork Lord
SUE-O-METER:
(bad)
COVER/BANNER ART: None. Right now it is a clip of her avatar. The piece is Harry Potter fanwork done in Anime style by Cloud-07. I believe it is supposed to be of Luna.
FULL NAME: Kiara Rabeau (The Rambo movies unfortunately come to mind.) We also have Albus Potter, Andreas Nota
SPECIES: She is the daughter of Eloise Midgen.
HAIR: n/a
EYES: n/a
MARKINGS: n/a
POSSESSIONS: n/a
CONNECTION TO CANON: The first chapter is used to introduce Kiara and her best friend and her brother. Nothing really special occurs other then the fact Kiara is mooning over Albus. We switch half way through to Andreas point of view and we find out Rose and Scorpius are together. I'm not sure if she is meant to be a rival for Kiara or a new friend.
ORIGIN: It's a next generation fic.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Kiara talks about Albus in great length. You can find what she says in the sample, but to summerize I'm going to say this. We have a first year drooling over a boy and a boy who is supposed to be able to go unnoticed but Kiara's description contradicts this greatly. “To top it all off, the professors seem to love me. I don't know what I ever did, but they all tend to go a little bit easier on me than everybody else. I mean, sure, I'm smart (the Sorting Hat almost put me in Ravenclaw for my 'sharp wit, cleverness, and academic interests'), but I don't really talk to them; I'm that kid who sits quietly in the back of the classroom trying to take as many notes as possible without drawing too much attention to myself. But, unfortunately, the professors call me out as much as possible, which calls more attention to me, and, by default, my face. I'm the 'nerd' of the school, or at least my grade, even though I'm a Hufflepuff. Not that it bothers me, I like being the nerd, but sometimes I want to be known as someone other than "that Hufflepuff nerd".” And... “For some reason, McGonagall thought I had 'potential as a prefect, and might be in the running for Head Girl'.”
NOTES: I have a rule of thumb for writers. It is annoying when the only point to a story is to pair two characters together. There are plenty of stories out there like this in a multitude of fanfiction.
SAMPLE:
"Kiara, over here!" I looked around for the source of the voice, finding my best friend waving at me from the other side of Platform 9 3/4. I ran over to her and gave her a squishing hug. Clara looked up at me, her gray eyes twinkling with excitement. Clara was five-foot-one, making the two of us a strange pair to see walking down the hallway, especially with me being five-foot-eight. Clara Flicker was one of those girls that you meet and just can't NOT like, with her big gray eyes, strawberry-blond hair, and friendly smile. Every student and teacher in Hogwarts loved her.
"I've missed you!" I sighed, and Clara nodded in agreement. I, on the other hand, am the exact opposite. I had blond hair and blue eyes, sure, but my hair was an out-of control frizzy-curl, and my eyes were just normal. They didn't even twinkle, like Clara's did, or pop out like my other friend Madeline, but they were just a plain, old, normal dark blue. Did I mention my face? Yeah, aside from having a baby face still (I'm fifteen, for Merlin's sake!), I have really bad acne in red blotches all over my face. Curse genetics.
"Have you greeted your brother and his friends yet?" Clara asked suggestively, wiggling her eyebrows as my brother passed, laughing with his posse of friends. I quickly smacked her arm as soon as they blended back into the crowd of students and parents. My brother, Joseph Rambeau, a Gryffindor sixth year, was the lucky one and got the good half of the genes. He had brown hair, chocolate eyes, very mild acne, was muscular, and, to top it all off, he was nearly six foot. It wasn't fair, really, how he got mostly my dad's looks. Not that my mom wasn't pretty, no, not in the slightest. She was absolutely beautiful, with long blond hair that fell in soft curls, quite unlike my wavy mess, and a smile that reached her vivid blue-green eyes when she laughed. My dad wasn't half bad either, you know, for a dad. Dad, or Nicholas Rambeau, was from France, so naturally he got the good looks. He has black hair (with little streaks of gray I won't let him forget) and chocolate eyes also, but if you look behind the innocent mask you will see the mischievous prankster within. My brother's friends were all the same way: good-looking, smart, kind, pranksters. They were popular too, but how could they not be?
"Oh who cares, Joseph wouldn't have heard me anyway," Clara said, rubbing her arm where I had punched her. "But of course, we both know you didn't care about Joseph-" She trailed off suggestively. I punched her again.
I guess I should probably explain more about my brother. He is VERY protective. I don't think he even realizes that he is, but I have never had a boyfriend (partly because I've never been asked out), though it might help if I weren't so afraid of my dad's judgment. This poses a problem when I am completely obsessed with his best friend, Albus Potter. It has nothing to do with the fact that he is Harry Potter's son either, as I had no idea who the hero was until my first year when I opened my first chocolate frog card. However, it has everything to do with those eyes; a deep emerald, they captivate me every time our eyes happen to meet (which is quite a lot). His deep voice never ceases to give me chills, either. But, by far, what first got my attention in first year was the way he seemed to fade into the crowd-or attempt to I guess. He IS Harry Potter's son, after all. I always wondered why someone so incredibly good looking and talented would want to go unnoticed, but he seemed to run from all the attention. That, and his eyes, drew my attention all the way back when I was eleven and sitting in Joseph's compartment. He was just so...mysterious. Normally I can figure out a person well enough to be able to know what they will laugh at, or what to say in an awkward situation, but he's so different. I guess it helps that those stupid eyes get me tongue-tied every time I look at him.
TITLE: If Only If Only (I believe the title is missing a comma...)
PERPETRATOR: The Dork Lord
SUE-O-METER:
(bad)
COVER/BANNER ART: None. Right now it is a clip of her avatar. The piece is Harry Potter fanwork done in Anime style by Cloud-07. I believe it is supposed to be of Luna.
FULL NAME: Kiara Rabeau (The Rambo movies unfortunately come to mind.) We also have Albus Potter, Andreas Nota
SPECIES: She is the daughter of Eloise Midgen.
HAIR: n/a
EYES: n/a
MARKINGS: n/a
POSSESSIONS: n/a
CONNECTION TO CANON: The first chapter is used to introduce Kiara and her best friend and her brother. Nothing really special occurs other then the fact Kiara is mooning over Albus. We switch half way through to Andreas point of view and we find out Rose and Scorpius are together. I'm not sure if she is meant to be a rival for Kiara or a new friend.
ORIGIN: It's a next generation fic.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Kiara talks about Albus in great length. You can find what she says in the sample, but to summerize I'm going to say this. We have a first year drooling over a boy and a boy who is supposed to be able to go unnoticed but Kiara's description contradicts this greatly. “To top it all off, the professors seem to love me. I don't know what I ever did, but they all tend to go a little bit easier on me than everybody else. I mean, sure, I'm smart (the Sorting Hat almost put me in Ravenclaw for my 'sharp wit, cleverness, and academic interests'), but I don't really talk to them; I'm that kid who sits quietly in the back of the classroom trying to take as many notes as possible without drawing too much attention to myself. But, unfortunately, the professors call me out as much as possible, which calls more attention to me, and, by default, my face. I'm the 'nerd' of the school, or at least my grade, even though I'm a Hufflepuff. Not that it bothers me, I like being the nerd, but sometimes I want to be known as someone other than "that Hufflepuff nerd".” And... “For some reason, McGonagall thought I had 'potential as a prefect, and might be in the running for Head Girl'.”
NOTES: I have a rule of thumb for writers. It is annoying when the only point to a story is to pair two characters together. There are plenty of stories out there like this in a multitude of fanfiction.
SAMPLE:
"Kiara, over here!" I looked around for the source of the voice, finding my best friend waving at me from the other side of Platform 9 3/4. I ran over to her and gave her a squishing hug. Clara looked up at me, her gray eyes twinkling with excitement. Clara was five-foot-one, making the two of us a strange pair to see walking down the hallway, especially with me being five-foot-eight. Clara Flicker was one of those girls that you meet and just can't NOT like, with her big gray eyes, strawberry-blond hair, and friendly smile. Every student and teacher in Hogwarts loved her.
"I've missed you!" I sighed, and Clara nodded in agreement. I, on the other hand, am the exact opposite. I had blond hair and blue eyes, sure, but my hair was an out-of control frizzy-curl, and my eyes were just normal. They didn't even twinkle, like Clara's did, or pop out like my other friend Madeline, but they were just a plain, old, normal dark blue. Did I mention my face? Yeah, aside from having a baby face still (I'm fifteen, for Merlin's sake!), I have really bad acne in red blotches all over my face. Curse genetics.
"Have you greeted your brother and his friends yet?" Clara asked suggestively, wiggling her eyebrows as my brother passed, laughing with his posse of friends. I quickly smacked her arm as soon as they blended back into the crowd of students and parents. My brother, Joseph Rambeau, a Gryffindor sixth year, was the lucky one and got the good half of the genes. He had brown hair, chocolate eyes, very mild acne, was muscular, and, to top it all off, he was nearly six foot. It wasn't fair, really, how he got mostly my dad's looks. Not that my mom wasn't pretty, no, not in the slightest. She was absolutely beautiful, with long blond hair that fell in soft curls, quite unlike my wavy mess, and a smile that reached her vivid blue-green eyes when she laughed. My dad wasn't half bad either, you know, for a dad. Dad, or Nicholas Rambeau, was from France, so naturally he got the good looks. He has black hair (with little streaks of gray I won't let him forget) and chocolate eyes also, but if you look behind the innocent mask you will see the mischievous prankster within. My brother's friends were all the same way: good-looking, smart, kind, pranksters. They were popular too, but how could they not be?
"Oh who cares, Joseph wouldn't have heard me anyway," Clara said, rubbing her arm where I had punched her. "But of course, we both know you didn't care about Joseph-" She trailed off suggestively. I punched her again.
I guess I should probably explain more about my brother. He is VERY protective. I don't think he even realizes that he is, but I have never had a boyfriend (partly because I've never been asked out), though it might help if I weren't so afraid of my dad's judgment. This poses a problem when I am completely obsessed with his best friend, Albus Potter. It has nothing to do with the fact that he is Harry Potter's son either, as I had no idea who the hero was until my first year when I opened my first chocolate frog card. However, it has everything to do with those eyes; a deep emerald, they captivate me every time our eyes happen to meet (which is quite a lot). His deep voice never ceases to give me chills, either. But, by far, what first got my attention in first year was the way he seemed to fade into the crowd-or attempt to I guess. He IS Harry Potter's son, after all. I always wondered why someone so incredibly good looking and talented would want to go unnoticed, but he seemed to run from all the attention. That, and his eyes, drew my attention all the way back when I was eleven and sitting in Joseph's compartment. He was just so...mysterious. Normally I can figure out a person well enough to be able to know what they will laugh at, or what to say in an awkward situation, but he's so different. I guess it helps that those stupid eyes get me tongue-tied every time I look at him.