Love is just a spell away
Are you too shy to approach the object of your affection? Do you fear rejection and ridicule? Does your "D" in potions prevent you from brewing a proper love potion? Despair not! You are but a spell away from true love.
Have your defense teachers against the dark arts warned you of those who want to bend you to their will? Have your parents told you that only dark wizards want to subjugate your mind? Have you learned that Imperio is an unforgiveable curse?
Not so!
Imperio is the single most reliable matchmaking spell in the history of wizardkind. Imperio will help you find your soulmate. Hundreds of success stories prove our claim. (for independent studies see Fanfiction, source of reliable information about the Wizarding World since 1995)
Just follow these easy steps:
- Find a ruthless individual.
- Ask the ruthless individual to cast Imperio on you whilst in the vicinity of the object of your affection (Ooya) and command you to engage in sexual intercourse with the Ooya. (You and the ruthless individual will need to negotiate all terms prior to the actual casting of the spell.)
- Upon release from Imperio display signs of guilt. Do not, under any circumstance, comfort the Ooya.
The Ooya will soon overcome silly notions and misgivings and understand that you are the injured party. Love will ensue. Your souls will meet just as your bodies have already met.
Romance will be had.