damn it's cold... and nasty... (x-posted from deadjournal)
i thought that i never update enough for my livejournal friends... so here is a little real-life suspence story just for you. bear with me through the nasty parts. this story has been rated R, for restricted, because thinking about what your parents' sex smells like.... that... that's just fucking UNCALLED FOR
ok. something FUCKING REEKS outside...
maybe... maybe it's just me. i woke up in the middle of the night to smell something.. horrible.. it was thick.. like smoke... only.. it smelled like burning soap... only... worse... like burning soap and burning hair and day-old gym socks burning... with soap... with like... rotten milk with lime... all just.. fucking burning... i would rather smell 500 nasty, dirty old men in a small room than that fucking smell. it was FUCKING DISGUSTING. it was so fucking strong that it woke me up at about 3:45 in the morning, right when i'm at the heaviest of the sleep patterns.
i looked around. i have had this problem before.. only it was a cat that was spraying outside suring the spring... and i know what THAT smells like... i DID think about what my parents said about smoking in my room. it wasn't ciggie smell... it wasn't my dirty laundry... it wasn't sex or mastubation of any knd by anyone.
my second instinct was "holy shit. the dryer caught on fire. someone must have put too much soap in 9cough.. me..) and forgotten to change the filter (cough, dad) after a load.... no. it was fucking worse than that. and the chances of someone doing laundry at 3:00 am were slim.... very.
third instinct was "omg. my heater is on fire. all the stuff under my bed must have finally caught. omg. we're all going to die...." i freaked out a little im my half-awoken state, i felt around for heat, mentally placed where all the fire extinguishers in the house, just incase, and sniffed around.
i sniffed powercords, extention cordsm i shut off the power to everything buy my fan in the hall that was sucking the air from outside into my room......... outside....
i got up, and i went over to the window... i sniffed. i gagged. it was something outside. omg. wtf WAS THAT?! it smelled so fucking horrible.
mom got up. i heard the jingling of her neckalces, and a few moments later, i smelled her ciggie smoke from the kitchen. i went out. "mom.. wtf is that smell?" "what smell?" she asked. "come here..." i took her down the front stairs to outside. i opened the door, smelled around and gagged. omg. fucking gross. i gagged, and shivered. it was cold. it was the combination of being cold and that fucking raunchy smell that made me shiver. the nastiest smell in the fucking world. she went outside next. i stood in the doorway with the cold beeze and shivered and twitched more... she still didn't smell it.
what the fuck. what the hell could this fuckign mystery smell be?... some dead animal outside?... some kind of... weird animal mating smell?... it wasn't and isn't a skunk. i can deal with those. they aren't that bad if they are far away. no no no.. not a skunk.
it's definainetly not sex. no matter how old my parents are.. there is no way that se
*jumps up* my cat just growled. of couse, at the time, i din't know that it was my cat... i jumped up, screamed, and grabbed the nearest large object, thinking "omg.. whatever is making that fucking god-aweful smell is in my fucking house... just act calm.... if it's TOO big, it can't get in. the worst thing that can happen is a racoon, or... maybe a small fisher cat?... but nothing that i can't kill if i need to... so.. nothing insane like a fuckin moose or a bear.. or.. something..." i walked towards the door. i felt something rub against my leg and i screamed. it was that goddamned cat. she made that friendly "cooing" noise that she used to make when she was younger, to let me know that it was her in the dark, i assume.
i got to the kitchen about 2 mins after i had jumped up. Sophie, my cat, right at my heels. i turned on the light. she went just a little bit ahead of me.
her head was perked up. her tail was in the "formal" form. we both knew that something, or someone was out there. i picked up a shoe... i tried scaring whatever it was away by knocking down some stuff around me... all the time.... talking... loudly... "hello?.... HELLO!!!!!! WHO'S OUT THERE???!!! GO AWAY!!!! HELLO???!!!!!!" i finally got to the door to the back proch. my cat was a little more relaxed. i relaxed just a little, although i know that i can't trust this just yet.
i took down the boarding that we have against our door, for a "ghetto cat door" thing... made of cardboard. i threw it down, and called for milky, my other cat, because last thing i knew she was outside... i looked around. nothing out there... i shut the door fast and stood and just relaxed.
i placed the shoe back down on the floor... my heart still racing... and i came back here to tell you about it right away. see?.. a wonderful suspence story, real life, just for you. over some big stink about something that will amount to nothing... litterally.
so anyways. like i was saying.... no sex smells that bad.. i'd rather not think about it... but really if you do... there is no fuckign possible way that it could smell like THIS.
also, the smell is coming from outside.
as i am sitting next to a window in the living room, however, not as close to one and with much less air flow as in my bedroom... i can STILL get a whiff of the goddamed smell outside...
first thing i did after mum went to bed was open up my purse and spray parfume on myself, so i'm in this litty bubble of good-smelling.
i smell damn good!... sexy beast kinda good. *winks*... something out there doesn't... scary beast kinda bad. *frowns*...
potato_neko
Look out for the m
HOLE
From Go-Quiz.com
i can live with people hating me because i'm hot. xD i could definently deal if it were true. xD
ok. something FUCKING REEKS outside...
maybe... maybe it's just me. i woke up in the middle of the night to smell something.. horrible.. it was thick.. like smoke... only.. it smelled like burning soap... only... worse... like burning soap and burning hair and day-old gym socks burning... with soap... with like... rotten milk with lime... all just.. fucking burning... i would rather smell 500 nasty, dirty old men in a small room than that fucking smell. it was FUCKING DISGUSTING. it was so fucking strong that it woke me up at about 3:45 in the morning, right when i'm at the heaviest of the sleep patterns.
i looked around. i have had this problem before.. only it was a cat that was spraying outside suring the spring... and i know what THAT smells like... i DID think about what my parents said about smoking in my room. it wasn't ciggie smell... it wasn't my dirty laundry... it wasn't sex or mastubation of any knd by anyone.
my second instinct was "holy shit. the dryer caught on fire. someone must have put too much soap in 9cough.. me..) and forgotten to change the filter (cough, dad) after a load.... no. it was fucking worse than that. and the chances of someone doing laundry at 3:00 am were slim.... very.
third instinct was "omg. my heater is on fire. all the stuff under my bed must have finally caught. omg. we're all going to die...." i freaked out a little im my half-awoken state, i felt around for heat, mentally placed where all the fire extinguishers in the house, just incase, and sniffed around.
i sniffed powercords, extention cordsm i shut off the power to everything buy my fan in the hall that was sucking the air from outside into my room......... outside....
i got up, and i went over to the window... i sniffed. i gagged. it was something outside. omg. wtf WAS THAT?! it smelled so fucking horrible.
mom got up. i heard the jingling of her neckalces, and a few moments later, i smelled her ciggie smoke from the kitchen. i went out. "mom.. wtf is that smell?" "what smell?" she asked. "come here..." i took her down the front stairs to outside. i opened the door, smelled around and gagged. omg. fucking gross. i gagged, and shivered. it was cold. it was the combination of being cold and that fucking raunchy smell that made me shiver. the nastiest smell in the fucking world. she went outside next. i stood in the doorway with the cold beeze and shivered and twitched more... she still didn't smell it.
what the fuck. what the hell could this fuckign mystery smell be?... some dead animal outside?... some kind of... weird animal mating smell?... it wasn't and isn't a skunk. i can deal with those. they aren't that bad if they are far away. no no no.. not a skunk.
it's definainetly not sex. no matter how old my parents are.. there is no way that se
*jumps up* my cat just growled. of couse, at the time, i din't know that it was my cat... i jumped up, screamed, and grabbed the nearest large object, thinking "omg.. whatever is making that fucking god-aweful smell is in my fucking house... just act calm.... if it's TOO big, it can't get in. the worst thing that can happen is a racoon, or... maybe a small fisher cat?... but nothing that i can't kill if i need to... so.. nothing insane like a fuckin moose or a bear.. or.. something..." i walked towards the door. i felt something rub against my leg and i screamed. it was that goddamned cat. she made that friendly "cooing" noise that she used to make when she was younger, to let me know that it was her in the dark, i assume.
i got to the kitchen about 2 mins after i had jumped up. Sophie, my cat, right at my heels. i turned on the light. she went just a little bit ahead of me.
her head was perked up. her tail was in the "formal" form. we both knew that something, or someone was out there. i picked up a shoe... i tried scaring whatever it was away by knocking down some stuff around me... all the time.... talking... loudly... "hello?.... HELLO!!!!!! WHO'S OUT THERE???!!! GO AWAY!!!! HELLO???!!!!!!" i finally got to the door to the back proch. my cat was a little more relaxed. i relaxed just a little, although i know that i can't trust this just yet.
i took down the boarding that we have against our door, for a "ghetto cat door" thing... made of cardboard. i threw it down, and called for milky, my other cat, because last thing i knew she was outside... i looked around. nothing out there... i shut the door fast and stood and just relaxed.
i placed the shoe back down on the floor... my heart still racing... and i came back here to tell you about it right away. see?.. a wonderful suspence story, real life, just for you. over some big stink about something that will amount to nothing... litterally.
so anyways. like i was saying.... no sex smells that bad.. i'd rather not think about it... but really if you do... there is no fuckign possible way that it could smell like THIS.
also, the smell is coming from outside.
as i am sitting next to a window in the living room, however, not as close to one and with much less air flow as in my bedroom... i can STILL get a whiff of the goddamed smell outside...
first thing i did after mum went to bed was open up my purse and spray parfume on myself, so i'm in this litty bubble of good-smelling.
i smell damn good!... sexy beast kinda good. *winks*... something out there doesn't... scary beast kinda bad. *frowns*...
potato_neko
Look out for the m
HOLE
From Go-Quiz.com
i can live with people hating me because i'm hot. xD i could definently deal if it were true. xD