My room mate needs a job more than I need mine
Too bad I can't give him the one I have. I have a strong support group of loyal friends and close family, as well as a rich girlfriend who owes me from when our roles were reversed and I was raking in overtime. Not that I don't need a job -- I definitely do -- but he needs one more.
The problem is his refusal to change. And I don't mean, to change something about his personality, but to change his hair and take off a few of his gaudier bracelets. He looks like an anime character. Once every two weeks he cuts his hair "to look more professional" but he always styles it the same way, with a lot of hairspray and careful twisting and shaping to give it just the right "I just got back from fighting an epic battle, and I was totally out of Mana the WHOLE TIME" look. He's 24, and has carried this look of an RPG-loving raver-punk with him since he was 14.
We talk about it sometimes. As with any remarkable difference between two people, it's a point of interest. I strive to change my appearance as often as feasible (I only shop when I can pay by the pound), and I feel a value in the versatility of being able to fit in anywhere as often as possible. He feels that the spiky shape of his hair is an aspect of his personality and that he looks terrible with a normal haircut. I think that most people view obvious elements of my appearance, such as my crutch, as little more than an ambivalent curiosity they are afraid to ask about. Trent thinks the tan-line that would be visible for a while if he removed his bracelets would be a glaring embarrassment.
There are jobs he's qualified for out there that wouldn't care how he looked, but over half of the food service and hospitality industry probably would care. Knowing this, he is afraid to look very hard. Assuming a place won't hire him, he will not apply, ensuring that he will not work there but sparing himself the feeling of being judged and rejected. Unwilling to change because he is afraid of how he will be seen, he hides from people that would want him to change and is getting ready to pay this months rent on credit. Afraid to call his grandfather because of what he thinks his grandfather will think if Trent doesn't bring good news, he is unable to get money to stay afloat, risking the generation of bad news.
It's tragic. It makes me angry because of the impending situation it puts me in, of having to arbitrate between my good friend and my girlfriend. I can't give him a loan because I am fiscally unable, and my girlfriend won't want to give him a loan because she'll be convinced he won't ever pay it. She COULD cover his rent, but she feels used and has financial obligations of her own that shouldn't include rescuing him and preventing him from controlling his own life.
Until the anarchist revolt against corporate slavery, we all have to make a sacrifice and do something we don't want to in order to live in this world. I have to hurt myself shaving and battle depression to get to work. Some people have to go through a lot more. Trent may have to go through a transformation himself if he wants to avoid disaster.
I can't stay angry, because we've all been there, or at least I have: a self destructive cycle that you can't change because you're afraid, and you're afraid because you need to change. For Trent, it's his hair, but it only seems trivial from my perspective. Such is the diversity of the human experience.
The problem is his refusal to change. And I don't mean, to change something about his personality, but to change his hair and take off a few of his gaudier bracelets. He looks like an anime character. Once every two weeks he cuts his hair "to look more professional" but he always styles it the same way, with a lot of hairspray and careful twisting and shaping to give it just the right "I just got back from fighting an epic battle, and I was totally out of Mana the WHOLE TIME" look. He's 24, and has carried this look of an RPG-loving raver-punk with him since he was 14.
We talk about it sometimes. As with any remarkable difference between two people, it's a point of interest. I strive to change my appearance as often as feasible (I only shop when I can pay by the pound), and I feel a value in the versatility of being able to fit in anywhere as often as possible. He feels that the spiky shape of his hair is an aspect of his personality and that he looks terrible with a normal haircut. I think that most people view obvious elements of my appearance, such as my crutch, as little more than an ambivalent curiosity they are afraid to ask about. Trent thinks the tan-line that would be visible for a while if he removed his bracelets would be a glaring embarrassment.
There are jobs he's qualified for out there that wouldn't care how he looked, but over half of the food service and hospitality industry probably would care. Knowing this, he is afraid to look very hard. Assuming a place won't hire him, he will not apply, ensuring that he will not work there but sparing himself the feeling of being judged and rejected. Unwilling to change because he is afraid of how he will be seen, he hides from people that would want him to change and is getting ready to pay this months rent on credit. Afraid to call his grandfather because of what he thinks his grandfather will think if Trent doesn't bring good news, he is unable to get money to stay afloat, risking the generation of bad news.
It's tragic. It makes me angry because of the impending situation it puts me in, of having to arbitrate between my good friend and my girlfriend. I can't give him a loan because I am fiscally unable, and my girlfriend won't want to give him a loan because she'll be convinced he won't ever pay it. She COULD cover his rent, but she feels used and has financial obligations of her own that shouldn't include rescuing him and preventing him from controlling his own life.
Until the anarchist revolt against corporate slavery, we all have to make a sacrifice and do something we don't want to in order to live in this world. I have to hurt myself shaving and battle depression to get to work. Some people have to go through a lot more. Trent may have to go through a transformation himself if he wants to avoid disaster.
I can't stay angry, because we've all been there, or at least I have: a self destructive cycle that you can't change because you're afraid, and you're afraid because you need to change. For Trent, it's his hair, but it only seems trivial from my perspective. Such is the diversity of the human experience.