If I Owned a Newspaper and the High School Lunchroom that is American Politics
At least six of the last ten headlines I have read simply, “Baby Killer.” So I did what anyone would do and excitedly dove into the story, anticipating news of a serial baby strangler. I was a little disappointed to find that this was just another account of congressional cocksmanship but then I read on about how Michigan’s own Bart Stupak may, in fact, be the infanticide lover I was initially looking for.
Stupak is a Democratic congressman who, until recently, opposed the healthcare bill because he did not want to support a movement that endorsed or advocated abortion in any way. Satisfied after months of discussion with the president and reviewing of the bill, Stupak make the hard choice to not assume something that wasn’t true in any way. This was a move that cost him his status as a person well known in Washington for not killing babies. While requesting that Republicans to reassess what the bill really meant and offered, several brave congressmen made loud unintelligible sounds which effectively stopped his speech for several seconds. Then the bomb was dropped and somebody yelled “Baby Killer!” Working under the guise of ensuring that the new healthcare bill included an executive order that ensured existing limits on federal funding for abortion remain exactly the same hadn’t worked at all. Stupak’s outing was undeniable- He was a baby killer and now everyone knew it.
I’m losing steam on politics. I’ve done my best to remain objective and informed but it’s just too frustrating. Too many people are just the right amount of ignorant and motivated to make a mess of things. Nobody wants to listen to each other and you are always being lied to. The news doesn’t help a thing either. You get celebrity drama, the weather, sports, more celebrity drama, natural disasters, the parade of unpleasant economic information and then the high school lunch room that is American politics.
I want to start making paper that just includes my daily musings, accounts of the mundane and random photos that I’ve taken that don’t seem to really fit any of the stories they are adjacent to. I want people to read my paper and say, “That was pretty good… uh… I think.” The weather would offer my best guess for that time of year and include a disclaimer. The sports page would have a rage of articles covering events from 1910 through 1990 and wouldn’t exclude things like lacrosse, chess and motorcycle racing. There would be a section that reviewed movies, music, art, literature, places, and one real life person chosen at not-so-random. I’d shoot for daily but, weekly is probably more doable. Honestly, it would likely just end up getting done whenever I felt like it and had some free-time.
That is, of course, unless it became a real money maker but I doubt it would. The average person isn’t going to want to read about how leaches have cell memory and, if humans did too, we could eat someone and gain their knowledge. Sure, that IS awesome journalism, but most people want to hear about what starlet Brad Pitt is making cry and the hip new way attractive lady celebrities are shaving their P'izone. My groundbreaking piece entitled, Whatever Happened to the Hamburgler? would pale in comparison to how addicted to sex some famous person could theoretically be.
He died of cancer in jail, by the way.
Stupak is a Democratic congressman who, until recently, opposed the healthcare bill because he did not want to support a movement that endorsed or advocated abortion in any way. Satisfied after months of discussion with the president and reviewing of the bill, Stupak make the hard choice to not assume something that wasn’t true in any way. This was a move that cost him his status as a person well known in Washington for not killing babies. While requesting that Republicans to reassess what the bill really meant and offered, several brave congressmen made loud unintelligible sounds which effectively stopped his speech for several seconds. Then the bomb was dropped and somebody yelled “Baby Killer!” Working under the guise of ensuring that the new healthcare bill included an executive order that ensured existing limits on federal funding for abortion remain exactly the same hadn’t worked at all. Stupak’s outing was undeniable- He was a baby killer and now everyone knew it.
I’m losing steam on politics. I’ve done my best to remain objective and informed but it’s just too frustrating. Too many people are just the right amount of ignorant and motivated to make a mess of things. Nobody wants to listen to each other and you are always being lied to. The news doesn’t help a thing either. You get celebrity drama, the weather, sports, more celebrity drama, natural disasters, the parade of unpleasant economic information and then the high school lunch room that is American politics.
I want to start making paper that just includes my daily musings, accounts of the mundane and random photos that I’ve taken that don’t seem to really fit any of the stories they are adjacent to. I want people to read my paper and say, “That was pretty good… uh… I think.” The weather would offer my best guess for that time of year and include a disclaimer. The sports page would have a rage of articles covering events from 1910 through 1990 and wouldn’t exclude things like lacrosse, chess and motorcycle racing. There would be a section that reviewed movies, music, art, literature, places, and one real life person chosen at not-so-random. I’d shoot for daily but, weekly is probably more doable. Honestly, it would likely just end up getting done whenever I felt like it and had some free-time.
That is, of course, unless it became a real money maker but I doubt it would. The average person isn’t going to want to read about how leaches have cell memory and, if humans did too, we could eat someone and gain their knowledge. Sure, that IS awesome journalism, but most people want to hear about what starlet Brad Pitt is making cry and the hip new way attractive lady celebrities are shaving their P'izone. My groundbreaking piece entitled, Whatever Happened to the Hamburgler? would pale in comparison to how addicted to sex some famous person could theoretically be.
He died of cancer in jail, by the way.