confused
GOD FUCKIN DAMNIT finaly i figure out how to update this mo-fo lol
i missed out on church today second time deriks probley pissed at me i didnt know that there is church on thursdays *shurugs* today i talked to my moms bf (his name is ken ) about all the stuff thats been goin on (i told him that hes liek my lil theropist haha).. life ..life is hard in ways but easy in others i think differnt then most people ... i dunno how to explain it so ...yawww!
i dunno if i should go and see like a theropist or what cuz i used to be overly depressed WASNT GOOD what so ever.. i used to cut my arms the whole thang... glad im not all the same like i was ... if u went thro it u would be glad to i did it all by my self :D good job sharleen lol... but some times like today i think about some o the stuff i used to think about i dunno like i think i dont have any friends but the i didnt but now i have david, kerin ,marty,and derik my bf..
i dunno its just weird i dunno what to do .. i have to get a job this summer so i can take drivers training WOOOWEEE!!! i drive allready but not leagaly .. what can i say im a sinner i smoke cigs (shame shame on me) i kno i wanna guit well i mean im goin to + derik wants me to soo im goin to .. kinda for him ..and my health haha right ..i smoke pot thats bad 2 but im smater when im stoned i dunno y its fuckin wicked lol.. i havnt gone to school in a year . i dont know many people arround here so its hard and theres alot of blacks arround here i dont like but O well its better then vassar .. vassar is a shit town .. poser ass bitches that tell lies about people to make them feel better about there selves .. i hate vassar i lives there for like 12 years never again my dad stll lives there in my old house ... i dont wanna even get started on his ass ...no one even cares probley to read any of this so ... i guess its to my self maby so i guess i will talk about him .. i need to get it out ...but people used to take this shit all out on me every thang my perents did ..ok here i go ..well when i was 6 i got ran over by a lawn mower its got my knee and something else (dont wanna talk about taht part) i had 250 stiches 7 pins and i dunno how many staples not regular staples they were bigger ... that wasnt fun .. only ridin arround in the wheel chair.. i have arthritous if thats how u speel it now .. witch means that my knee hurts alot and i have to take meds for it when i get a lil older or maby when my mom takes me to see if i have to get some or not ...My dad started drinkin, well he was an alcohalic (i dont know how to spell very good) till i was 8 my mom was too but i dunno till when prolby arround the same time they stoped then my dad statred doin crack and pot and he would pressure my mom in to doin it with him *asshole* he beet my mom durring most of this time he had the most demestic violence abuse in tescola county ... for the longest time ... when my mom let him she stoped doin all thos things but now she takes alot of pills *sad* i wish she wouldnt do that it worries me *starts to cry* i mean were tryin to make our lives better and she tryin but she still take alot of pills an shit... my sister has helped me the most it doesnt really seem like it but she has (stacey) that and my friends and my new bf that i have now .. they've made this easyer on me they make me not think about all this shit and im lucky to have them .. if i didnt have them i would be all depressd again and have NO life be a looser (still kinda am) .. well im done with my sob story ... im goin to ride on lukes (isaacs dad) crotch rocket YAY!!!
cuz im watchin staceys kids for 2 hours while they go get the bike ... well im out of this bitch.. night
i missed out on church today second time deriks probley pissed at me i didnt know that there is church on thursdays *shurugs* today i talked to my moms bf (his name is ken ) about all the stuff thats been goin on (i told him that hes liek my lil theropist haha).. life ..life is hard in ways but easy in others i think differnt then most people ... i dunno how to explain it so ...yawww!
i dunno if i should go and see like a theropist or what cuz i used to be overly depressed WASNT GOOD what so ever.. i used to cut my arms the whole thang... glad im not all the same like i was ... if u went thro it u would be glad to i did it all by my self :D good job sharleen lol... but some times like today i think about some o the stuff i used to think about i dunno like i think i dont have any friends but the i didnt but now i have david, kerin ,marty,and derik my bf..
i dunno its just weird i dunno what to do .. i have to get a job this summer so i can take drivers training WOOOWEEE!!! i drive allready but not leagaly .. what can i say im a sinner i smoke cigs (shame shame on me) i kno i wanna guit well i mean im goin to + derik wants me to soo im goin to .. kinda for him ..and my health haha right ..i smoke pot thats bad 2 but im smater when im stoned i dunno y its fuckin wicked lol.. i havnt gone to school in a year . i dont know many people arround here so its hard and theres alot of blacks arround here i dont like but O well its better then vassar .. vassar is a shit town .. poser ass bitches that tell lies about people to make them feel better about there selves .. i hate vassar i lives there for like 12 years never again my dad stll lives there in my old house ... i dont wanna even get started on his ass ...no one even cares probley to read any of this so ... i guess its to my self maby so i guess i will talk about him .. i need to get it out ...but people used to take this shit all out on me every thang my perents did ..ok here i go ..well when i was 6 i got ran over by a lawn mower its got my knee and something else (dont wanna talk about taht part) i had 250 stiches 7 pins and i dunno how many staples not regular staples they were bigger ... that wasnt fun .. only ridin arround in the wheel chair.. i have arthritous if thats how u speel it now .. witch means that my knee hurts alot and i have to take meds for it when i get a lil older or maby when my mom takes me to see if i have to get some or not ...My dad started drinkin, well he was an alcohalic (i dont know how to spell very good) till i was 8 my mom was too but i dunno till when prolby arround the same time they stoped then my dad statred doin crack and pot and he would pressure my mom in to doin it with him *asshole* he beet my mom durring most of this time he had the most demestic violence abuse in tescola county ... for the longest time ... when my mom let him she stoped doin all thos things but now she takes alot of pills *sad* i wish she wouldnt do that it worries me *starts to cry* i mean were tryin to make our lives better and she tryin but she still take alot of pills an shit... my sister has helped me the most it doesnt really seem like it but she has (stacey) that and my friends and my new bf that i have now .. they've made this easyer on me they make me not think about all this shit and im lucky to have them .. if i didnt have them i would be all depressd again and have NO life be a looser (still kinda am) .. well im done with my sob story ... im goin to ride on lukes (isaacs dad) crotch rocket YAY!!!
cuz im watchin staceys kids for 2 hours while they go get the bike ... well im out of this bitch.. night