Start me up
So it hasn’t really been going as planned. now shacked up between nowhere and nothin. Hate writing on a computer. Hate writing on a computer running Microsoft. Hate writing at the moment so just going to do more. Squiggly green lines beneath everything I consider, red undermining my spontinanity. I’ve given up most punctuation, spelling, grammar. People know what you fucking well mean and anything else is an unwanted pedant crawing about knowing more about nothing. It isn’t laziness, I used to hate butchers too but I truly gave up caring after the hundredth eat, shoots and shits parody. This spell-check on word does not help either, I could go into it but I’m sure people less funny and less original than me have already levelled a sub-below-ordinate-par piece about it. Like most columns, even in the mighty times newspaper (sistercompanyofthattwatmurdockskyskyskybuybuybuy), I feel as soon as I have read the by-line that 1) not only could I have done better but 2) it is WEAK WEAK WEAK. I thought newspapers were meant to by dying?! Caitlyn Moran?! Whatever the fuck A.A.GILL actually is?! By the way was that 1) and 2) thing above easier and more straight-forward than maybe if I’d done one of those ; things in a half-arsed attempt to get it right, before I consult google with an ashamed-rouged cheek check….”how do I write like a pedantic moron about pedantic morons while lampooning awful sub-editors and their awful piece-meal writers?”. Anyway, bits and bobs may find a way on here as i'm clearing lots of stuff out and half-formed things may have to find an slightly more etheral home.