For You, Always [5]
Pairings: JaeMin
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: boyxboy, and if you're really strict about the definition of incest then... incest.
Summary: Jaejoong is the oldest son but not the heir. Changmin wants nothing but his older brother’s approval. A bond stronger than blood binds them together and brotherly love develops into something more.
A/N: short chapter this time, but better than nothing. I had to cut some scenes because my brain refused to make them work. Don't worry they were not important and did not change much of the actual plot. Sorry for the long wait!
Dedicated to almightyflame
Jaejoong found himself staring at the ceiling of Yoochun’s room. The light-colored plaster provided some entertainment when he tried to make out shapes among the lumps and the valleys between them. Yoochun was obnoxiously throwing a tennis ball up in the air, only to catch it moments later and then repeat. There was a heavy rainstorm raging outside and the incessant plummeting of water against the glass window was the only sound they could hear.
That morning Jaejoong had woken up feeling refreshed. The spot where Changmin’s fist had collided with his jaw was still tender to the touch, and when he looked in the mirror it was still purple, but he was glad there were no hard feelings between his brother and he.
Deciding it would be a good idea to spend some time together to forget about the experience, he decided he would take Changmin with him to the stream a few minutes away from their house to fish. It was early enough for it, and with some luck it would not rain that day.
However, when he went to knock on Changmin’s door, he found one of the maids inside, tidying up the room. His brother was nowhere to be found.
He cleared his throat to get the maid’s attention. “Minji, have you seen my brother?”
Minji gave a bow of acknowledgement before answering. “He left with his father and grandmother earlier today, Young Master.”
Jaejoong made a face, his mood darkening immediately. He wanted to ask his mother what was up with them but she was gone as well, to an early breakfast gathering at one of her friends’ house.
He ate breakfast alone, stabbing angrily at the extra strawberries Cook had placed on his plate in hopes of cheering him up. It did not work, though he ate them all, appreciative of Cook’s efforts.
After eating he went into the library, hoping to find any clues about where half his family had gone but found nothing. Bored, he tried to go through one of Changmin’s precious books but he did not get through one page before dropping the book altogether with a huff.
There was nothing to do around the house with everyone gone so he went to get his bike from the shed and told Cook he was going to the Park’s house and that he would return for dinner.
He was almost at Yoochun’s house when the sky began to rumble, mirroring his mood. A second later a couple droplets landed on his hands and face and continued to fall over him with increasing force. By the time he arrived at his destination he was all drenched, much to his best friend’s delight.
“You look like a drowned rat,” Yoochun had said between laughing fits while Jaejoong attempted to fry him with his glare.
Thankfully, Yoochun’s mom was a little more understanding of his predicament and after lending him some of her son’s clothing, she sent the sodden clothes with a maid to dry.
“Could you stop that?” Jaejoong said, annoyed.
“Well, someone’s moody,” Yoochun replied, but mercifully stopped throwing the ball around. “There’s nothing else to do though.”
“Where do you think they went?” Jaejoong asked, still looking up at the ceiling.
Yoochun groaned. “Are you still worrying over that? Who cares! If they took only your brother then it must have been a very boring place.”
Jaejoong rolled his eyes.
“He’s not so boring,” he muttered, before something hit the side of his head. “Ow! What was that for?!?!”
He rubbed the spot where the ball had hit him while Yoochun grinned cheekily.
“I thought you needed someone to fix your brain for you if you think your brother is not the most boring person in the world.”
“I’ll fix YOUR brain…” Jaejoong mumbled as he got up to retrieve the ball. He did not have very good aim but he could at least try to get Yoochun back. He crouched in front of Yoochun’s bookcase, wondering if the ball had rolled under it. He groped under it with hand; however, his fingers did not close around a round shape, but a rectangular one.
“Huh?” He brought out a deck of cards and smiled. “Hey, Yoochun!”
His best friend grinned back, making space on the bed for them to play.
It poured all throughout the afternoon and well into the night. Jaejoong had to borrow the telephone in Yoochun’s house to call home so their driver could pick him up.
The drive was a silent affair, the only soundtrack being the pitter-patter of the raindrops against the car’s windows, and the soft rumbling of the engine. From what the driver had told him, his brother was back home, along with Appa and Halmoni. He did not say anything else, and Jaejoong did not ask either, preferring to get the juicy details from his dongsaeng.
By the time Jaejoong walked through the front door, everybody was preparing to enter the diner, but Jaejoong was sent upstairs to wash up. He spotted his brother in between Appa and Halmoni, looking exhausted. He was about to approach him when Eomma told him to go wash up again. Wanting no trouble, he hurried upstairs. He could talk with his brother after dinner.
He changed out of Yoochun’s clothes and washed his face and hands under the running water of the faucet. He hurried out; jumping when he passed Halmoni’s room and Charles barked and growled at him from the closed door. He kicked the door for good measure, smirking when the dog went hysterical inside.
Jaejoong skipped every two steps down the stairs and was seated as soon as the food was brought inside the dining room by the servants. Halmoni frowned as soon as she saw his unkempt hair and Jaejoong had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling.
Provoking his grandmother proved to be akin to playing with fire, as soon Jaejoong found out. Halfway through the meal a smile drew itself on her face and it only took a glance at Jaejoong from her for him to know he was in for some pain.
“What did you think of your Father’s company, Changmin-ah?” she asked, almost kindly.
“Um, it’s nice Halmoni,” Changmin replied, shifting in his chair. Sensing his brother’s discomfort, Jaejoong turned towards him but Changmin avoided his eyes.
Curiosity was eating at him, wondering why his father would take Changmin to the company but leave Jaejoong home to entertain himself. He was the eldest and thus the company would be inherited to him when Appa retired.
“Why didn’t you take me too, though?” Jaejoong asked, feeling slightly betrayed.
Halmoni was about to reply when Appa beat her to it.
“Actually, Jaejoong, we were thinking of sending you to study abroad in England,” Appa said, busying himself with his food.
Both brothers turned to look at their father, eyes big as plates. Even Eomma seemed surprised and Halmoni covered a small shriek behind her hand.
“Dongsik!” she exclaimed, dropping her chopsticks on the plate with a resounding clank.
“What?” Jaejoong asked, utterly confused.
“We think it would be best for you to finish school there so that you will perfect the language. Then you can attend a prestigious English college,” Appa continued.
“Why?” Jaejoong asked, voice small. He turned to look at Changmin who shook his head, and then at his mother who had gotten over the shock of her husband’s words. She threw him a remorseful look, and Jaejoong had never felt more betrayed in his life. So she knew.
The fact that Halmoni was still shocked could have been counted as a small victory, though Jaejoong did not notice, too focused on swallowing around the knot in his throat.
“What do you mean ‘why?’ Anyone would jump at an opportunity like this, Jaejoong.”
“W-when,” Jaejoong paused, trying to get some moisture on suddenly dry tongue. “When am I to leave?”
“At the end of the summer,” his father dead-panned. “That’s why we thought it best to leave you to enjoy your time here with your friends.”
This time they were Jaejoong’s chopsticks that clattered against the plate, falling awkwardly and landing on the floor with a splatter of left-over sauce. A maid hurried to pick them up but stopped when Jaejoong slid his chair backwards, standing up suddenly. His eyes were hidden from sight by his long bangs, but Changmin could see his hands were shaking at his sides.
“I am not going,” Jaejoong whispered without looking up.
His father did not even bat an eyelash at his words; he merely set his chopsticks down, wiping his mouth with the napkin placed on his knees.
“It is not a negotiable matter,” he reminded his son.
“I SAID I AM NOT GOING!” Jaejoong yelled, his fingers curling into firsts as he turned away from the table, exiting the dining room in long strides.
“That is no way to speak to your father, young man!” Halmoni hollered after him just before he disappears around the corner.
To everyone’s surprise it was Eomma who placed a hand on top of Halmoni’s to stop her from chasing after Jaejoong, probably to hit him over the head with her cane.
“That’s enough, Eomeoni,” she scolded her mother-in-law, rendering her speechless.
Changmin made to stand and follow his hyung, but his father’s sharp words stopped him.
“Sit down, Changmin. You are not going anywhere until we all finish our dinner.”
Changmin obeyed, still fearful of his father’s authority. He stole looks into the corridor, almost hoping Jaejoong would come back; to apologize for his outburst, to yell some more… anything. Anything would have been better than the silence that permeated the house after that.
He was eventually allowed to stand and he rushed upstairs in seconds. When he tried his brother’s door he noted it was not locked. It almost seemed like an act of open rebellion; as if daring Appa to scold him or beat him because he was not afraid.
Changmin almost expected Jaejoong to be sitting on his bed, arms crossed and frown on his face while he waited for his punishment, but what greeted him when he pushed the door open was darkness. All the lights were off and his hyung was on his bed, tucked into the sheets and facing away from the door, asleep (or at least pretending to be).
Changmin went into his own room and nervously changed into his pajamas. Any exhaustion he felt from the busy day Halmoni and Appa had prepared for him was all but forgotten and a jittery feeling took its place. Even though he turned off all the lights and climbed into his bed he refused to sleep, straining his ear in hopes of catching either one of his parents going into his hyung’s bedroom.
But neither did. He heard them climb the stairs after Halmoni who made tremendous noise with her cane and then later when she greeted her yapping dog in the guest bedroom. They retired to the master bedroom and even though Changmin waited for another hour or so they did not come back out again.
Years later, when Changmin thought back on the incident, he would pinpoint Appa’s lack of response towards Jaejoong’s behavior as guilt.
Sometimes Changmin would wish Appa had scolded his hyung, keeping pretences for a little while longer if only for Jaejoong’s sake.
Because that night marked the moment in which Jaejoong’s life as he knew it began to crumble into dust.