Something In Rain
Theres something about the rain that makes my brain run wild. Not the intelligent part of my brain, but the emotional, sensitive side. The side of me that made me and Alan stand in the rain for a good 10 minutes blowing faces on Julies window. And at that moment, I think I couldve kissed him. It's the same part of me that is so naiive about how two faced everyone is a coldstone. They pretend to be friends but never come right out and say "i'd lay it all down for you". The childish side of me splashed thru puddles and fogged up the windows of my truck while me and julie and Alan ate wendys chili ("hold the fingers, please!").And drew our names on the glass. That same side of me, the impulsive side sat at a stop light and watched the lightning unfold and rip the sky apart , just to be mended again in the darkness, and I thought of my chair. The chair with endless layers of paint on it. How mindblowing would it be to paint that stoplight on the rungs of that chair. How credible would it be to pull him aside and say everything that he's not picking up on. Would he understand? Could he walk away after that? Would I create an archetype in his mind?
Theres something in rain that makes me want to run outside and soak it all in. I want to be out there, doing what you're supposed to do in rain. Get wet. I want to be able to stare someone in the face, soaked to the bone and know that we're on the same page now, and not just in the same book. I want to not care about what I look like, or who might see that I look like a wet dog. i want to be there, and amazing the whole while.
Theres something in me that leaves me here. Im under my roof, dry and warm. And I'm unsettled. I'm living in this whole made up thing pretending to go along with it. I can see the whole plot, and I could ace it all. Instead I become the conflict instead of resolution.
Think of me when you feel cooped up and hopefully you'll see me running barefoot through the Tsunami parking lot, just glad to have the weather. Think of the stop light and how something everyday can suddenly become your muse. And when everything looks like its over, the flood has come and he still doesnt understand you, when you can see where you went astray, when you dont want to be treated like something you're not, think of me. Remember when your world is falling to pieces, because I'd lay it all down for you.