hmm...
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?
Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic'?
If you mated a bulldog and a shiatsu, would it be called a bullshit?
Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?
Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for
centuries 'have a 'use by' date?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?
Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
What do people in China call their good plates?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong?
Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion
stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your ass?
Did you ever notice how pissed off a dog gets when you blow in his face but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your ass?
Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic'?
If you mated a bulldog and a shiatsu, would it be called a bullshit?
Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?
Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for
centuries 'have a 'use by' date?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?
Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
What do people in China call their good plates?
Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong?
Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion
stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your ass?
Did you ever notice how pissed off a dog gets when you blow in his face but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?