ugh
the internet makes me sad ... i hadn't logged into myspace in ... months, and i just did and well, yeah, it made me sad and i now wish that i hadn't.
my internet grammar confuses me. i use proper punctuation with only some words and sentences. and then theres "..." ... i just do it. its a stream of consciousness type of thing. thats just ... how the words come out of my mind. little breaks and pauses and then i throw it into my typing.
i used to write a lot and i started to write a script. but not working and having so much goddamn time - in an environment where i'm virtually never alone - makes me break down mentally. i can't actually think or create anything worthwhile or ... creative. i'm so sick of all the shit i've been doing day in and day out i'm sick of it. i wanted to be dedicated to this script so badly, but now i have about 2 scenes that are actually OK after probably 4 months of having the idea for the "story" ... and i don't even have a story or an outline, i just have a topic and a few general ideas. it's a nightmare.
wow is a joy and a curse. i want to get to 70 so badly and start playing with my friends. i'm stuck at 57 because i'm waiting for matt, because it'd be cool to ride into outlands together and have y'know, a mutual enjoyment. since that's what that type of game is really supposed to be about, friendship and community. where it's really not that at all. it's just a solo effort to make yourself better than the person standing next to you however you can. basically, its real life ... people cause drama, stab each other in the back, they are loyal and kind and cruel and nasty. i've gotten to 57 without really ever having a party. actually, yeah, i've never done a dungeon with a full party the way it's meant to be done. i'm going to suck @ 70 ...
do people read LJ anymore? i know it's more supposed to be for myself than anyone else, but then, i can always write things down or type it and just save it on my comptor for myself to reflect upon if i wish it. the point of this is to share your life and feelings with those you care about yea? myspace ruined the internet ... and people. seriously, i remember LJ being this big popular thing because you could keep up on people's lives and what was important. but myspace? it's just where people can spam their minute to minute updates on random bull shit. i have yet to see anything meaningful to come out of myspace. its just stalker type shit and being "friends" with people you don't give a fuck about to see if theres anything juicy going on in their life or any drama or other some such bull shit so that you can ignore your own life. unless i'm wrong and it's this wonderful tool of communication. but there would have to be a really compelling argument for my view to change on what myspace is and is not. FUCK myspace.
i'm lacking people that care about me and i think it's how i've dealt with those closest to me in the last 6 years. maybe it's when i get all firey and rant about bull shit. maybe its my stubbornness and my lack of foresight. i'm a shitty person and i feel bad about the things i've done - or the lack of things that i should've done. yea, more the lack of things that i know i should've done.
i wanted this post to actually be a little bit light spirited ... heh ... i'm rad at doing the things i wanted to do, or should do.
/sarcasm
fuck the internet
my internet grammar confuses me. i use proper punctuation with only some words and sentences. and then theres "..." ... i just do it. its a stream of consciousness type of thing. thats just ... how the words come out of my mind. little breaks and pauses and then i throw it into my typing.
i used to write a lot and i started to write a script. but not working and having so much goddamn time - in an environment where i'm virtually never alone - makes me break down mentally. i can't actually think or create anything worthwhile or ... creative. i'm so sick of all the shit i've been doing day in and day out i'm sick of it. i wanted to be dedicated to this script so badly, but now i have about 2 scenes that are actually OK after probably 4 months of having the idea for the "story" ... and i don't even have a story or an outline, i just have a topic and a few general ideas. it's a nightmare.
wow is a joy and a curse. i want to get to 70 so badly and start playing with my friends. i'm stuck at 57 because i'm waiting for matt, because it'd be cool to ride into outlands together and have y'know, a mutual enjoyment. since that's what that type of game is really supposed to be about, friendship and community. where it's really not that at all. it's just a solo effort to make yourself better than the person standing next to you however you can. basically, its real life ... people cause drama, stab each other in the back, they are loyal and kind and cruel and nasty. i've gotten to 57 without really ever having a party. actually, yeah, i've never done a dungeon with a full party the way it's meant to be done. i'm going to suck @ 70 ...
do people read LJ anymore? i know it's more supposed to be for myself than anyone else, but then, i can always write things down or type it and just save it on my comptor for myself to reflect upon if i wish it. the point of this is to share your life and feelings with those you care about yea? myspace ruined the internet ... and people. seriously, i remember LJ being this big popular thing because you could keep up on people's lives and what was important. but myspace? it's just where people can spam their minute to minute updates on random bull shit. i have yet to see anything meaningful to come out of myspace. its just stalker type shit and being "friends" with people you don't give a fuck about to see if theres anything juicy going on in their life or any drama or other some such bull shit so that you can ignore your own life. unless i'm wrong and it's this wonderful tool of communication. but there would have to be a really compelling argument for my view to change on what myspace is and is not. FUCK myspace.
i'm lacking people that care about me and i think it's how i've dealt with those closest to me in the last 6 years. maybe it's when i get all firey and rant about bull shit. maybe its my stubbornness and my lack of foresight. i'm a shitty person and i feel bad about the things i've done - or the lack of things that i should've done. yea, more the lack of things that i know i should've done.
i wanted this post to actually be a little bit light spirited ... heh ... i'm rad at doing the things i wanted to do, or should do.
/sarcasm
fuck the internet