Lost In Translation
Here are some recent personals ads from the Washington Blade and what they really mean:
Ad #1:
SEEKING YOUNGER MAN Handsome GWM, 42, 6', 175#. Seeking 18-25, Czeck(sic), Slovak, Latino, Asian, Persian, Palestinian, Israeli for friendship & kindred pursuit of happiness. Movies, converesation (sic), & spending time together desired.
Translation:
MIDDLE AGED CHICKEN HAWK SEEKS exotic/Euro-looking twink to engage in banal activities until I can convince you to let me fuck you.
Ad #2:
BE MY BELATED BIRTHDAY PRESENT Nice Jewish guy seeks a slender to muscular GW/L/A/M, 20s - late 30s. I'm 33, 6'2", 180#, br/bl, fit & trim, affectionate, financially/emotionally stable, into travelling, cultural events, the gym, home improvement, family, friends and my dog. I'm looking for a guy who's creative, altruistic, romantic, communicates effectively and wants to settle down into a monogamous LTR, possibly with children.
Translation:
HIGH MAINTEANCE JEW ISO selfless jock to smother and breed.
Ad #3:
BALTIMORE GWM, 52, 5'10", 170# w/ black hair & moustache. Interests incl opera, symphony, theatre, travel, reading, movies. Looking to meet another GWM, 45-55 w/ same interests for dating, w/ LTR possible.
Translation:
MIDDLED AGED BALTIMORE ARTS BEAR seeks same.
Ad #4:
ISO ADULT WHO always finds pleasure in any/all things Fran Drescher; who digs Pee-wee Herman, loves Ethel Merman, boasts not of his physical measure. A mensch who knows what is classy; admits he adores Shirley Bassey; deems Ricky Martin erotic & Travolta hypnotic; behaves like a lad, not a lassie. If your IQ is more than your age & mention of Bush makes you rage, you're my kind of guy. Shy? So am I. Reply if we're on the same page.
Translation:
LEFT-WING JEW ISO similar hung (but modest) media-junkie, closets a +++.
Ad #1:
SEEKING YOUNGER MAN Handsome GWM, 42, 6', 175#. Seeking 18-25, Czeck(sic), Slovak, Latino, Asian, Persian, Palestinian, Israeli for friendship & kindred pursuit of happiness. Movies, converesation (sic), & spending time together desired.
Translation:
MIDDLE AGED CHICKEN HAWK SEEKS exotic/Euro-looking twink to engage in banal activities until I can convince you to let me fuck you.
Ad #2:
BE MY BELATED BIRTHDAY PRESENT Nice Jewish guy seeks a slender to muscular GW/L/A/M, 20s - late 30s. I'm 33, 6'2", 180#, br/bl, fit & trim, affectionate, financially/emotionally stable, into travelling, cultural events, the gym, home improvement, family, friends and my dog. I'm looking for a guy who's creative, altruistic, romantic, communicates effectively and wants to settle down into a monogamous LTR, possibly with children.
Translation:
HIGH MAINTEANCE JEW ISO selfless jock to smother and breed.
Ad #3:
BALTIMORE GWM, 52, 5'10", 170# w/ black hair & moustache. Interests incl opera, symphony, theatre, travel, reading, movies. Looking to meet another GWM, 45-55 w/ same interests for dating, w/ LTR possible.
Translation:
MIDDLED AGED BALTIMORE ARTS BEAR seeks same.
Ad #4:
ISO ADULT WHO always finds pleasure in any/all things Fran Drescher; who digs Pee-wee Herman, loves Ethel Merman, boasts not of his physical measure. A mensch who knows what is classy; admits he adores Shirley Bassey; deems Ricky Martin erotic & Travolta hypnotic; behaves like a lad, not a lassie. If your IQ is more than your age & mention of Bush makes you rage, you're my kind of guy. Shy? So am I. Reply if we're on the same page.
Translation:
LEFT-WING JEW ISO similar hung (but modest) media-junkie, closets a +++.