(no subject)
I feel as though this is the longest break I've taken from this blog. Has it been a month? I think it has. In my defense, I have two jobs, both of which are incredibly stressful in their own right. And there's been a lot of drama and fear about the first one, due to mismanagement of the city. I haven't felt a lick of inspiration in a while and this is entirely due to my personality, where I want to work as hard as possible, even if it means stifling myself in the process. Interacting with people is still quite difficult for me as well.
I haven't written except for small bits here and there. I've tried to focus on sewing more, simply because I keep buying fabric with big dreams and have a stash that is starting to pile up. But I've been discussing it and I'm trying to get back into the groove of writing an hour a day without judging myself too harshly. That's part of the stifling issue as well. Judging my work before its even finished.
I've been really hard on myself lately. I tell myself that I can't even come up with a good idea anymore, why couldn't I be like the me of a few years back? Why can't I think creatively about books? I must have grown stupider over time. But the reality is that I'm always going to be that person - it's just difficult to think with a clear head when you're exhausted and constantly belittling yourself.
I've finished so many books that I haven't had any time to talk about. A couple of memorable favorites were Vanessa Veselka's Zazen and Daniel Clowes' Patience. Maybe I just need some rest. A break. This weekend, in particular, has been very good for me. I've had the past couple of days off and I'll have Sunday off as well, which is time enough for me to recharge.
Until then.
I haven't written except for small bits here and there. I've tried to focus on sewing more, simply because I keep buying fabric with big dreams and have a stash that is starting to pile up. But I've been discussing it and I'm trying to get back into the groove of writing an hour a day without judging myself too harshly. That's part of the stifling issue as well. Judging my work before its even finished.
I've been really hard on myself lately. I tell myself that I can't even come up with a good idea anymore, why couldn't I be like the me of a few years back? Why can't I think creatively about books? I must have grown stupider over time. But the reality is that I'm always going to be that person - it's just difficult to think with a clear head when you're exhausted and constantly belittling yourself.
I've finished so many books that I haven't had any time to talk about. A couple of memorable favorites were Vanessa Veselka's Zazen and Daniel Clowes' Patience. Maybe I just need some rest. A break. This weekend, in particular, has been very good for me. I've had the past couple of days off and I'll have Sunday off as well, which is time enough for me to recharge.
Until then.