Live Journal
Just had a 5 minute conversation with Ari where he informed me that he had read my livejournal. I was vaguely alarmed, especially when I asked how far he's gone and he said through "Most of it." I don't think I've ever flattered him in my LJ, so I knew what was coming would not be good. He then proceeded to critique my style and choice of words which was a bit of a surprise.
He said that I got the reason why he broke up with Jules wrong (the lack of drama) and that I should not have said in my LJ entry that if things don't work out with J we will just break up. I explained I didn't write the LJ for J or to influence others in any way--it's really a snap shot of my thinking at a particular moment and should be taken as such. I don't encourage J to read my LJ, nor do I read his (except when he dumped me, but now that we are together again I don't bother, even when he's still logged into the computer I am using, I just log him out). Ari found this baffling as he would read his lover's LJ without hesitation.
That's when I explained I didn't want it to be a substitute for in person communication, especially with my lover. It does help with maintaining contact with my friends on the east coast who, when they think of me, may check in and see how I'm doing or what my recent adventures are, but that's because in person contact is not as readily available. I could tell Ari thought I was being an idiot and it sort of offended me to have the recordings of my musings be evaluated in that way. I also hate being forced to defend my actions, about anything really.
I guess I assumed he would just accept this for what I think of it as, a dumping ground for random thoughts, instead of a tool to shape the way I want to be perceived. The former is a release, while the later would be too much work. I know, I should just make the posts private, but fuck that. I want my lazy ass east coast friends to read this (which they do, even though they refuse to join) and on some level, everything I'm saying is up for grabs. If it was really secret, you can bet it wouldn't even leave my brain, let alone my fingertips. For example I never said anything about ********** or *********. See, I may seem like I lay it all out there, but I can keep shit quiet if I want to.
He said that I got the reason why he broke up with Jules wrong (the lack of drama) and that I should not have said in my LJ entry that if things don't work out with J we will just break up. I explained I didn't write the LJ for J or to influence others in any way--it's really a snap shot of my thinking at a particular moment and should be taken as such. I don't encourage J to read my LJ, nor do I read his (except when he dumped me, but now that we are together again I don't bother, even when he's still logged into the computer I am using, I just log him out). Ari found this baffling as he would read his lover's LJ without hesitation.
That's when I explained I didn't want it to be a substitute for in person communication, especially with my lover. It does help with maintaining contact with my friends on the east coast who, when they think of me, may check in and see how I'm doing or what my recent adventures are, but that's because in person contact is not as readily available. I could tell Ari thought I was being an idiot and it sort of offended me to have the recordings of my musings be evaluated in that way. I also hate being forced to defend my actions, about anything really.
I guess I assumed he would just accept this for what I think of it as, a dumping ground for random thoughts, instead of a tool to shape the way I want to be perceived. The former is a release, while the later would be too much work. I know, I should just make the posts private, but fuck that. I want my lazy ass east coast friends to read this (which they do, even though they refuse to join) and on some level, everything I'm saying is up for grabs. If it was really secret, you can bet it wouldn't even leave my brain, let alone my fingertips. For example I never said anything about ********** or *********. See, I may seem like I lay it all out there, but I can keep shit quiet if I want to.