the day before today was totally different

[poo_on_yo0_]

soo i guess me and tom are going out now. im really excited about it but really really really scared about it.. cuz after he left yesterday i cried.. and i kno exactly why.. i cant put myself through the same thing that i did b4.. i cant even do it. and i dont kno theres something about tom that reminds me of billy which scares me cuz i dont want to get hurt as bad as i did b4. like after tom left yesterday i sat there with my hand on my head saying to myself "forget about tom forget about tom" over and over again i dont kno im just scared.. and i reallllyyyy dont think that tom would do that. but i also didnt think that billy would do that.. and i kno its crappy of me to bring all this up cuz its shit for me and him both.. i mean im not holding a grudge or ne thing.. it may seem like it but im not.. its just weird.. id ont kno if ne one has ne clue what im talking about but i do.. i dont kno. basically im pissing my pants cuz im so scared.. and i want to talk to tom about it but im also scared to talk to him too. so maybe all in all im just a big pussy. whatever

so last night was ALOT of fun.. im so happy that i finally hung out with cheryl i missed that girl like crazy.. i dont kno what i would do without that girl.. she made me realize alot about alot last night.. and it was great. shes a really good advice giver and i needed that. she talked me out of everything. i love that girl

i miss mark! i mean yeah we never really hung out a whole lot.. but i mean cmon its been like 393457 years since weve hung out. ( mark by the way you lost sooooo much weight.. i looked at you and like shitmylself. a plus kiddo).

well i gotta go now me and jerras family gotta go to church for a lil bit.

<333
Steph