how are you
when someone asks, "how are you" i guess what they really want to hear is, "fine." having usually not discussed it when i was "not fine" i'm beginning to realize even my closest friends and the guy i'm dating really don't want to hear about it if i'm not. they only want the bubbling color child side of my personality. they're bored if i'm going to through something rough. they quickly assume that i'm "always in a pickle" if i have a series of rough patches or if i'm not thrilled in the mediocrity of this stupid place or if my relationships arent all giddy and serious.
having lived in Maui for a while and now i'm here. its dark and cold and i feel like a burden to everyone i know. i came here because i don't think anyone reads this. LOL. if i had the finacial freedom, i'd be living thousands of miles from here. or certainly hundreds. i feel horrible and deeply depressed. surely there must be a magical diamond somewhere that can cure this. why are people so scared of honesty? why am i cursed to always be the outsider in certain situations?
i miss the sun. i miss leaves. i miss freedom.
having lived in Maui for a while and now i'm here. its dark and cold and i feel like a burden to everyone i know. i came here because i don't think anyone reads this. LOL. if i had the finacial freedom, i'd be living thousands of miles from here. or certainly hundreds. i feel horrible and deeply depressed. surely there must be a magical diamond somewhere that can cure this. why are people so scared of honesty? why am i cursed to always be the outsider in certain situations?
i miss the sun. i miss leaves. i miss freedom.