Social nightmare
I had another dream that I caused one disaster after another for someone, and everyone ended up hating and despising me. I sat on a hillside, thinking wistfully that what I wanted was to be gently euthanized while kind, caring people were with me, soothing me as I went out. I'm tired of being beaten up and hated in my dreams. I have no idea what it means, and don't care. I just want those dreams never to happen again. This is my own mind beating me up, night after night after night! If it isn't dreams of breaking or otherwise destroying everything around me that's worth anything and being hated and loathed by everyone because of it, it's those dreams of endlessly walking along the margins and verges of freeways, trying to find a way off and into the nearby suburbs, or something else that I really don't need to be dreaming. Why do I so rarely dream of anything good? Why is my own mind endlessly beating me up like this, grinding it in that it hates and depises me, that I'll forever remain homeless and without anything worth a damn, that nobody loves me, etc. etc. etc.?