Commercial cluelessness

[polarbeast]

I'm almost getting used to the fucked-in-the-head robbery of culture in order to pander to consumerism. Almost. I hear the ghost of John Lennon endorses Nike, Chase credit cards and diapers. Robert Plant sings about Cadillacs. They don't, really, but it creates some kind of false connection for those American shoppers easily led by an "OMG I'm empowered because I remember this song" leash.

I was thinking about those Royal Caribbean cruise commercials and their usurping of the Iggy Pop song "Lust for Life" in order to sell imagery of pasty, vaguely Anglo-Saxon families (socially valid mommy, daddy, boy, girl unit) leaping into swimming pools, jet-skiing, climbing up fake mountain walls, exercising on stationary bikes, eating fun dinners.

Brrrrumm-bum bum, badum bah badum bum heeeah comes Johnny, yeeeah, looks so fine, wheeee look at us! Cruises are FUN! C'mon, kids! Parent-approved safe activity on a cruise line I used to think had a shred of repute.

Here, then, are the first few lyrics of "Lust for Life," as penned by Iggy Pop:

here comes johnny yen again
with the liquor and drugs
and the flesh machine
he's gonna do another striptease
hey man where'd you get
that lotion? i been hurting
since i bought the gimmick
about something called love
yeah something called love
that's like hypnotizing chickens
well i am just a modern guy
of course i've had it in the ear before
'cause of a lust for life

So, a garage-glam-infused song about survival after heroin, commandeered for white suburbia on vacation. Perfect Utopian logic.