I think it's about time I start blogging again.
I don't know why, I just feel it's something I need to start doing again. I guess it's just that time of year. It seems that the last couple of years this has been around the time I start to blog. I think it may just be the only real coping mechanism that I've actually managed to perfect and this is the time of year that's just bad for me. The insomnia has started...it started about a month ago...but that didn't really bother me. I suppose it's because of the times zone difference (more on that later.) I don't know. I'm just holding my breath waiting for the voices to come. Hopefully they are quieter than usual this year. Summer was pretty good for me looking at current standards so I'm hoping I don't get to sick this winter.
I guess I'll throw in dazzling tale of Jenissa's Adventures in Boyland! And do I ever have a good one this time. We're going to start our tale off in the summer because that's when this particular tale starts. Now by this time I'm not doing so good. I was still fairly crushed about Brian and his return to his ex, which he informed me of over the phone after I told him not to contact me if he didn't have anything good to say (not still bitter about that by any means,)so I started internet dating. I decided to go by the quantity over quality rule of the internet and thus I had three guys that I was regularly talking to. All of these guys were strictly internet fellas and thus we never met in real life because I'm not that stupid (anymore.) So I`m going to Cole`s Notes these guys because you know what they weren`t really important and well if I told their stories, this post for me would end up a thousand page novel (a little bit of hyperbole but this is my post so shut it!) There was Drinks Too Much who liked to get really drunk and call my up at three in the morning for sex, (read: drive out to Rapeville to meet at Rape Alley,)which I wouldn`t do because as much as I like the idea of being raped and left for dead in a ditch I don`t and I`m not that stupid. The one I suspect is actually a women. He called me up one day crying asking me if I could please just be there in his dreams that night...right. He also said that he thought that he loved me and that this was “for real this time” after like twenty minutes of talking on msn. So yeah. And then there was The Creeper. I really should have known better about this one because I replied to a craigslist post about wanting to kill himself because everything sucks, people and friends suck and how girls are all bitches and whores. Yeah...I said the usual you know, “things look bad now but you’ll get through and in the end things will work out for the best” type crap thinking I`m saying a nice thing so a guy who`s emotionally retarded wouldn`t kill himself because the pretty girl in class pointed and laughed at him. We start talking and have quite a few things in common good times...that`s like 90% of the internet. Five minutes into the conversation he tells me he loves me. Ten minutes in the asks me to marry him. Two days later he demands that I marry him because he told his mother about me and she approves. About two weeks after that I mention something about my mom saving me money for school and he tells me that as my husband it`s really his that I should give it too him right away. Fuck! No wonder he`s complaining about never touching a boob. Delusional is all I have to say. Someone might argue this guy just has a misunderstood sense of humour...but from what I could tell he was dead serious about all this and I was freaked the fuck out.
So yeah by the summer I most definitely had my share of stupid boys. Totally wasn`t looking at all even by this point so when my best friend Robin said that her cousin was coming to visit and that she`d love it for me to hang out with them while he was here totally didn`t put any stock in it. So yeah the first time we hang out I notice that he`s pretty much my type from head to toe and to add to things he`s British so yeah sexy accent and all. But I shrug things off because he was only suppose to be here a month and Britain is fucking far away and lastly I really wanted nothing to do with boys at that time. Boys were the enemy and I wasn`t in the best place to start anything even just a no-strings fling with a guy from another country. This is what I wanted...but this is not how things worked out. This is how things worked out: (and I`m going to cole`s notes this one because it`s already late and yeah...sleep probably should be a priority but it isn`t.) Robin introduces me to Chris when we all go to Playland together. Good times are had. Robin and I are too much in our Robin and Jenissa world for anything to come out of it. Chris isn`t even on my radar. Robin, Chris and I go to Oliver because it`s sunny there and they have beaches. Little known to me...Chris and Robin start getting really close leading to them getting super drunk in Oliver and having sex. Chris and I start to hit it off there...but neither of us really "notice" it. We come back. Robin and Chris continue what ever it is that they were doing. Chris and I hang out a few more times. I chalk it all up to him being British; Chris writes it off to him only being here a month. Chris goes to Seattle. Chris comes back for a day or two, we hang out some more and then he leaves again for Victoria. Robin thinks their in love. I tell Robin I may like Chris. She tells Chris I like him. He tells her to keep her mouth shut about them because he likes me too. Robin tells me he`s leaving soon and to forget about him. I shrug it off to him being British and agree that he is leaving soon. Robin sets up a date for Chris and I because she knows he likes me. I invite my roommate because I don`t know it`s a date. Robin decides to crash the date because it`s technically already being crashed because I don`t know it`s a date. Chris comes back from Victoria. We all (Chris, Robin, my roommate and I) hang out for the evening because that`s the plan or so I think. Chris decides to lay to moves on. *Insert happy dance* Robin freaks out. Robin freaks out harder! ROBIN IS TOTALLY FUCKING FREAKING OUT! I try to figure out what`s happening. Shit hits the fan and everything comes out (they were sleeping together, she lied to me about everything, she told him I like him, she knew that he liked me and didn`t tell me, she told me to forget about him because she loves him, she threatens to kick him out of her house because he likes me.) I offer to take him home with me because she doesn`t want him in her home. She declines because she hopes to work things out with him. They work things out somewhat. I talk to him and he admits he did a stupid thing and really regrets loosing his chance with me. I offer to drive him to the Airport. He agrees but has to throw it past Robin. Robin decides that if I`m going to drive him to the airport she`s not going to be there. I tell her she`s being stupid. They have sex again (but I don`t know about this) and so she agrees she`s being stupid and to let me drive to the airport. All of us are Awkward with a capital A! Chris and I drop hits to each other about interest in each other. Chris leaves. Robin freaks out at me for being a bad friend I sling it back because it`s bullshit we fight but ultimately things are okay...not great but okay. I send Chris a text inquiring as to whether he got home alright. He replies he did and that he already misses me. Chris and I start emailing because I`m lame and sent him a message about love being worth it and how I thought we had some pretty awesome potential. Chris and I keep this up for about a week. A Horrible (with a capital H) thing happens to Robin. Robin freaks out at Chris even though it couldn`t have been his fault. Chris is freaked and informs me of it. Robin and I hang out for the first time since shit went down. Robin tells me that Chris and her continued to sleep together up until he left that they are in love. I freak out on Chris. Robin and I make up entirely because she knows I`m pissed and never want to talk to Chris again. She is satisfied by this out come. Chris manages to get a hold of me and explains everything so they make sense. Chris and I are okay. Robin finds out Chris and I are now okay and she isn`t okay. Robin breaks up with both of us because she feels we should have put her above our feelings and didn`t making us horrible people.
Now to sum up where I am right now. Robin is still not really talking to me because she`s still mad and she can`t deal with this right now. Chris and I email on a regular basis and I`ve made plans to go visit him at the end of March staying in Europe for at least five months. So yeah now I`m in a long distance relationship with a British Accountant. Robin and I are slowly working things out but I don`t know if she`ll ever trust or care about me again. I didn`t deserve to loose her trust...and I`m pretty sure I`ve never going to get it back. So yeah really looking forward to England and seeing Chris again. I just have to make it threw Christmas.
I guess I'll throw in dazzling tale of Jenissa's Adventures in Boyland! And do I ever have a good one this time. We're going to start our tale off in the summer because that's when this particular tale starts. Now by this time I'm not doing so good. I was still fairly crushed about Brian and his return to his ex, which he informed me of over the phone after I told him not to contact me if he didn't have anything good to say (not still bitter about that by any means,)so I started internet dating. I decided to go by the quantity over quality rule of the internet and thus I had three guys that I was regularly talking to. All of these guys were strictly internet fellas and thus we never met in real life because I'm not that stupid (anymore.) So I`m going to Cole`s Notes these guys because you know what they weren`t really important and well if I told their stories, this post for me would end up a thousand page novel (a little bit of hyperbole but this is my post so shut it!) There was Drinks Too Much who liked to get really drunk and call my up at three in the morning for sex, (read: drive out to Rapeville to meet at Rape Alley,)which I wouldn`t do because as much as I like the idea of being raped and left for dead in a ditch I don`t and I`m not that stupid. The one I suspect is actually a women. He called me up one day crying asking me if I could please just be there in his dreams that night...right. He also said that he thought that he loved me and that this was “for real this time” after like twenty minutes of talking on msn. So yeah. And then there was The Creeper. I really should have known better about this one because I replied to a craigslist post about wanting to kill himself because everything sucks, people and friends suck and how girls are all bitches and whores. Yeah...I said the usual you know, “things look bad now but you’ll get through and in the end things will work out for the best” type crap thinking I`m saying a nice thing so a guy who`s emotionally retarded wouldn`t kill himself because the pretty girl in class pointed and laughed at him. We start talking and have quite a few things in common good times...that`s like 90% of the internet. Five minutes into the conversation he tells me he loves me. Ten minutes in the asks me to marry him. Two days later he demands that I marry him because he told his mother about me and she approves. About two weeks after that I mention something about my mom saving me money for school and he tells me that as my husband it`s really his that I should give it too him right away. Fuck! No wonder he`s complaining about never touching a boob. Delusional is all I have to say. Someone might argue this guy just has a misunderstood sense of humour...but from what I could tell he was dead serious about all this and I was freaked the fuck out.
So yeah by the summer I most definitely had my share of stupid boys. Totally wasn`t looking at all even by this point so when my best friend Robin said that her cousin was coming to visit and that she`d love it for me to hang out with them while he was here totally didn`t put any stock in it. So yeah the first time we hang out I notice that he`s pretty much my type from head to toe and to add to things he`s British so yeah sexy accent and all. But I shrug things off because he was only suppose to be here a month and Britain is fucking far away and lastly I really wanted nothing to do with boys at that time. Boys were the enemy and I wasn`t in the best place to start anything even just a no-strings fling with a guy from another country. This is what I wanted...but this is not how things worked out. This is how things worked out: (and I`m going to cole`s notes this one because it`s already late and yeah...sleep probably should be a priority but it isn`t.) Robin introduces me to Chris when we all go to Playland together. Good times are had. Robin and I are too much in our Robin and Jenissa world for anything to come out of it. Chris isn`t even on my radar. Robin, Chris and I go to Oliver because it`s sunny there and they have beaches. Little known to me...Chris and Robin start getting really close leading to them getting super drunk in Oliver and having sex. Chris and I start to hit it off there...but neither of us really "notice" it. We come back. Robin and Chris continue what ever it is that they were doing. Chris and I hang out a few more times. I chalk it all up to him being British; Chris writes it off to him only being here a month. Chris goes to Seattle. Chris comes back for a day or two, we hang out some more and then he leaves again for Victoria. Robin thinks their in love. I tell Robin I may like Chris. She tells Chris I like him. He tells her to keep her mouth shut about them because he likes me too. Robin tells me he`s leaving soon and to forget about him. I shrug it off to him being British and agree that he is leaving soon. Robin sets up a date for Chris and I because she knows he likes me. I invite my roommate because I don`t know it`s a date. Robin decides to crash the date because it`s technically already being crashed because I don`t know it`s a date. Chris comes back from Victoria. We all (Chris, Robin, my roommate and I) hang out for the evening because that`s the plan or so I think. Chris decides to lay to moves on. *Insert happy dance* Robin freaks out. Robin freaks out harder! ROBIN IS TOTALLY FUCKING FREAKING OUT! I try to figure out what`s happening. Shit hits the fan and everything comes out (they were sleeping together, she lied to me about everything, she told him I like him, she knew that he liked me and didn`t tell me, she told me to forget about him because she loves him, she threatens to kick him out of her house because he likes me.) I offer to take him home with me because she doesn`t want him in her home. She declines because she hopes to work things out with him. They work things out somewhat. I talk to him and he admits he did a stupid thing and really regrets loosing his chance with me. I offer to drive him to the Airport. He agrees but has to throw it past Robin. Robin decides that if I`m going to drive him to the airport she`s not going to be there. I tell her she`s being stupid. They have sex again (but I don`t know about this) and so she agrees she`s being stupid and to let me drive to the airport. All of us are Awkward with a capital A! Chris and I drop hits to each other about interest in each other. Chris leaves. Robin freaks out at me for being a bad friend I sling it back because it`s bullshit we fight but ultimately things are okay...not great but okay. I send Chris a text inquiring as to whether he got home alright. He replies he did and that he already misses me. Chris and I start emailing because I`m lame and sent him a message about love being worth it and how I thought we had some pretty awesome potential. Chris and I keep this up for about a week. A Horrible (with a capital H) thing happens to Robin. Robin freaks out at Chris even though it couldn`t have been his fault. Chris is freaked and informs me of it. Robin and I hang out for the first time since shit went down. Robin tells me that Chris and her continued to sleep together up until he left that they are in love. I freak out on Chris. Robin and I make up entirely because she knows I`m pissed and never want to talk to Chris again. She is satisfied by this out come. Chris manages to get a hold of me and explains everything so they make sense. Chris and I are okay. Robin finds out Chris and I are now okay and she isn`t okay. Robin breaks up with both of us because she feels we should have put her above our feelings and didn`t making us horrible people.
Now to sum up where I am right now. Robin is still not really talking to me because she`s still mad and she can`t deal with this right now. Chris and I email on a regular basis and I`ve made plans to go visit him at the end of March staying in Europe for at least five months. So yeah now I`m in a long distance relationship with a British Accountant. Robin and I are slowly working things out but I don`t know if she`ll ever trust or care about me again. I didn`t deserve to loose her trust...and I`m pretty sure I`ve never going to get it back. So yeah really looking forward to England and seeing Chris again. I just have to make it threw Christmas.