I should be having an orange pineapple blast

[pokahot]

I spent two years unable to cry, recently. Me. The most emotional girl I've ever known. The girl who would cry anytime a sitcom dad's feelings were hurt because of their teenage daughter's harsh words. It was quite the dry spell, and while it was a nice vacation, I really started to miss it. Crying helps me clear my head. I would always get a good cry in before making any important decisions. I felt almost robotic..definitely not human and definitely not myself. Then, when my cat died, I finally got my touch back, and for 24 hours I did nothing but cry. He was my best friend in the world. He loved in the most subtle ways. He would pretend he was too busy to be bothered, but at all the right moments he was there. He never stood me up when I needed him. It should be sad when the only "person" you can depend on is your cat, but I was oddly content with it. I now understood why the crazy cat lady existed. Why my friends Caitlin and Micah spoke so often and highly of their feline friends. Why my best friend cried so much when she lost her cat, and why she loved her so much. I had never appreciated anyone so much, and had it returned in such a way that I was more than happy having nothing and no one else. I just miss my fucking cat. And now I'm making up for lost time and lost tears. I've been crying uncontrollably for twelve straight hours now. While I (with the exception of my recent drought) have always been very emotional, I have never had such a marathon of tears. I'm drained,I'm sick, I'm hallucinating, I'm driving my boyfriend crazy. All over a fucking cat.

I'm hoping to God that Darlene and Roseanne are nice to Dan, tonight. I couldn't handle a John Goodman breakdown in my current, fragile state.